Snippet

"Mommy! I'm not being careful!"

Patrick just yelled this at me from the bedroom in an attempt to get me to go back in there. It reminded me of when he was little-er and he would carefully arrange himself on a soft, carpeted area before throwing a tantrum. Without actually hurting himself (which would bring me, running) he is playing upon my fears that such a hurting is imminent. Like a sweepstakes contest he MAY HAVE ALREADY INJURED HIMSELF by the time I enter the bedroom. He is threatening to... make unwise choices! Unless I act now he might... put himself in a situation that could possibly result in future bodily harm!

You will note that I am still sitting here. I just spent an hour playing some game with him that seemed to possess only the loosest of rules and involved equal parts: Me Getting Kneed in the Head and Me Getting Slobbered Upon. As icy as is the hand that now rests upon my heart (knowing as I do that my beloved child is not being careful) I'm not going back in there again unless there is an actual contusion, sorry. Loving, yes. Masochist, no. Also I hate being slimed by anything and Patrick has recently created something he calls Harmonica Kisses... blech.

Not to make this a live-feed or anything but in the time it has taken me to write this Patrick has abandoned his attempts to cajole me back into the bedroom and has moved to the hallway overlooking the first floor. He just hollered down for a three-letter word that starts with H.

"Hat!" I yelled.

"How about a different one?"

"Ham!"

"How about a different one?"

"Her!"

"Different one!"

"His!"

"How about a..."

"Patrick, what are you looking for here?"

"Hot!" he replied.

"Um, Hot?"

"Thanks!" And he raced off.

I have no idea what that was about.

The injectible IUI cycle continues despite my certainty that I was going to be summarily dismissed yesterday. I have... some follicles. My e2 levels are... something. I will probably trigger (or not)... sometime in the future. This clinic is not very forthcoming with the information. In fact, you go for the labwork and ultrasound and then check a voicemail system after 3:30 to see if there have been any changes to the protocol. If you do not have a message you are to assume that everything is the same until further notice. I have heard that some people dislike this place for this reason but it is suiting my current state of detachment perfectly. Next appointment tomorrow morning, at which time I expect they really will cancel me, but we'll see. If they don't cancel me I will start getting excited again but for now it is barely registering as an event.   

I need to go find out what Patrick is doing (crossword puzzles?) and then we are all going to go swimming in the river. It is Mars-hot around here today.   

Comments

[Just Linda]

Well, I'll wait for you to get excited before I get excited, but can I say I do hope you get to get excited soon?

I love the comfortable tantrum visual. It reminds me of my very favorite clip from Americas Funniest Home Videos (yeah, I watch it - you people have something to say about that??) -- the toddler was throwing a tantrum and the mother was filming. She would walk into another room where the child could not see her, and he would stop crying, get up, walk into the room where she was, and then throw himself down into full tantrum mode again. They played this game for several minutes, her moving to different rooms, him stopping and resuming his tantrum. I was laughing so hard I may have given myself a harmonica on my chin.

[Tine]

Harmonica Kisses...hilarious!

[Lyss]

So much personality packed into a four year old. How do you stand it? My heart would explode. I would send a thousand text messages to my husband every day, entitled "Guess what he said now?"

Thank goodness you write these down so you never, ever forget.

[Her Bad Mother]

Sounds like Patrick knows from hot (hot enough for random spelling? That's hot.) And - does he know that HURT is a four-letter word?

Can't believe that I'm only just delurking and commenting now, over spelling, but there you have it.

[Adrienne]

[Said in an "I want a pony" voice:]

I want one, and I want it to be just like Patrick.

I want another one for you before one for me, though.

[Isn't that a nice, sandboxy sentiment?]

But he's so clever and funny already that I wish I could have babysat a child like that. I hope that his attempts at manipulation stay this transparent for quite some time, for your sake :). Have you looked into whether or not they have crosswords for preschoolers? ("Four down: Five-letter word for animal that goes 'neigh.'")

I'm crossing my fingers for you.

[Chookooloonks]

Harmonica kisses ... lovely. Alex has taken to licking me. She moves toward me like she's going to kiss me, and like a Pavlovian lap dog, I similarly move toward her, eagerly, and then right before the point of contact, she opens her mouth wide, and ... NAAASTY.

We must never get our children together.

Crossing my fingers for you,

K.

[Julie]

"...my current state of detachment". Hear you loud and clear.
Patrick sounds so undeniably awesome, I can barely stand it!

[Toni]

I get "That's it - I'm going to get a time out. Two minutes on the timer please" as she walks to the stairs. I'm starting to think that she's actually getting a time out away from me.

[Miz S]

It's cool and cloudy here in Fenwick Island, Delaware. Bet you've been here before in your previous life as a wild and crazy DC girl. Yes?

Hope you don't get cancelled, darling Julia. All fingers crossed.

[Pieces]

You are doing a great job of not responding to terrorist threats. ("Mommy! I'm not being careful!")

How do they know EXACTLY what to say to get our attention? Proof that our kids are actually smarter than we are.

[Katie Kat]

Oh God, I remember the days of the shots, the numbers, the cc's and Gonadatropin-whatchamacallit stuff, and calling my doctor's office after 3:00 to find out what my personal voicemail thingy said I was supposed to do next. It's aggravating!

I hope your numbers are up (down?) and you have many (few?) follicles... I've erased all memory of the process from my mind! But I do hope it works out.

[julia]

fingers crossed ...

Hope swimming was fun!

[Frankie]

Soooo...Patrick is really smart? Got it.