Things My Child Does Badly v.1

As you may recall, Patrick's final preschool assessment last year touched on his inability to competently wield a pair of scissors. The teacher asked him to cut along the dotted line and he proceeded to hack away with both hands flailing until nothing remained but a few shreds of confetti. When she covered this shortcoming of his I believe the conversation went thusly:

"Now as you can see from his scissor work..."

"MY GOD! You gave him SCISSORS? Where is he? Is he ok? Did he cut himself, how badly did he cut himself? What about the couch? Did you let him anywhere near my couch with these demon scissors of yours?"

She gave me a sedative and suggested we try practicing with scissors at home.

And I thought about it, honest I did, but SCISSORS! You can cut something, something like a duvet or a cat's ear, with a pair of scissors. Scissors make me nervous. Playdough, now, there is a past time that is fun educational and completely unsharp. Lots of great, safe, small-motor skill building to be accomplished with a nice lump of play dough, says I.

So Patrick and my precious precious stuff survived the summer but he returned to preschool in September as incompetent with a blade as he had left it in June.

Which is why I was dismayed when he insisted today that he needed a pair of scissors and some paper because he wanted to cut out letters (free hand) and paint them. I doubted that he was going to go from garden weasel to kirigami master in less than five seconds with virtually no practice, and while I am as willing as the next parent to watch my child try and fail, Patrick tends to try, fail, and have a complete fucking meltdown while repeatedly trying and failing again. And it is LOUD. The psychologist who tested him the other week suggested the mot juste for Patrick is "meticulous". Which is all very good and well and I hope his biology lab partner appreciates this fine quality, but a small meticulous child is mostly a pain in the ass. Seriously. I remember when he decided to learn how to write two years ago but he lacked the basic skills to hold a pen upright. It was such an hallucinogenic, tantrum filled, days on end, nightmare that I finally confiscated all of his writing materials and refused to give them back. Then I walked into his room one morning and found him sitting on the floor tracing letters in the air with his finger. I felt like Mao or something. 

Today I wound up giving him both the paper and the scissors, although I did my damnedest to sell alternatives like "coloring with markers" and "eating an entire package of Sweet*tarts". To his credit, he was actually better with the scissors than I had anticipated. Yes he cuts upside-down. Yes he occasionally uses both hands to cut which necessitates the use of his FOOT as a paper holder. Yes I had to help with the curves which was totally how I wanted to spend my afternoon. Yes he cried and threw the scissors (he THREW the SCISSORS. see? how unsafe does that sound? and you were just blaming me for stunting his development with my neuroses) a few times when the cut zigged instead of zagged. But in the end he had produced 12 reasonable looking letters, A through L.

Then he went and got a small jar of paint. He fetched a little brush. He placed the 'A' just so on the dining room table. He unscrewed the paint cap. He studied his wafer-thin, copier paper canvas with a critical eye. At which point he upended the paint jar and deliberately poured 6 fluid ounces of red paint into a puddle over the center of the 'A', which he then slashed at with the brush for about ten seconds.

"Perfect!"

I suspect that the next preschool conference very well may cover painting. 

PS I am still sad. I am going to be 35 in a few weeks and although I usually love my birthday the way Louis XIV loved, oh I don't know, himself, I am approaching this one with a slight feeling of hysteria. Like, "I am turning 35 and I will never have another baby and that makes me feel sad." OK. Maybe not hysteria. Despondency! Better. One of the preschool mothers asked yesterday how my weekend was and I just stared at her. She laughed and said, "That exciting, huh?" And I said, "Well every day is exactly like every other day and has been for years, right?" Which has got to be the most Eeyore-esque thing I have ever uttered. I am also still bleeding, faintly. You may make a note of that: post D&C bleeding 14 days and counting. I have said it before but absolutely everything may be considered normal after a miscarriage. Up to and including locusts.      

PPS In continued fairness, Patrick now has great penmanship, the despotic moratorium on quills notwithstanding. His writing is more legible than mine, and fifty times more legible than Steve's.

PPPS But he cannot catch a ball.

Comments

[SheilaC]

Scissor work is a difficult preschool task for most kids. Starting with the alphabet is definitely doing it the hard way! Yay Patrick for having so much success with that. In our 3 and 4 year old preschool classes the kids got quite frustrated trying to cut out shapes. By 4 years old, straight lines were okay but curves could easily bring on tears. My kids got it eventually, but it was especially frustrating for my son.
Yes, it is good to practise cutting paper at home, under supervision. He'll get it eventually.
You are a much braver woman than I with the paint. Eeek! Most kids get to paint at home, but the only stuff we did was water colours. I couldn't face the potential mess with triplet preschoolers and tempera paint on my wood floors, clothing, walls, etc. They got lots of chances at preschool and kindergarten.
My sympathies re. the losses and the approaching birthday. Best wishes,

[b]

It is SO nice to know that someone else also has a "meticulous" child to deal with. Thank you for giving me a glimpe into the future. I am still dealing with a two year old shouting "I DO IT!" when we are dressing in the morning, for example. And when the shoe doesn't slip on just right (she likes to do the velcro on each shoe twice, which brings us to the OCD portion of this segment) her complete fucking meltdown ensues. Argh.

[b]

Ah, *glimpse*

You can see the meticulousness did not come from her mother.

[Annie]

Yeah, you've got a gifted kid all right! My sympathies. :) (That was a joke! But meticulousness is indeed a common part of the very-high-IQ package, so whattaya gonna do?)

If you haven't already, can you get Patrick some of those blunt-nose scissors for kids? It's almost impossible to hurt anyone with those, even if you throw them. Also, to give you moral courage, I'll tell you that I learned to hand-sew when I was five. With sharp, pointy needles, AND scissors. I knew that my mom would take it all away if I did naughty things with them, and I took that seriously. Never sewed the cat's ears together. (I did once "trim" the cat's whiskers, and am still hearing about that at the age of 44. Sigh.)

As for Patrick getting overly upset about failures ... have you thought about teaching Patrick how to meditate? Seriously. Not that I'm trying to turn him into a mini-Zen master or anything, but once you learn how to access that feeling that you get when you meditate, you can then access it in other situations too. Such as when the damned scissors are out to get you. I have not tried teaching meditation to a child myself, but I have been told that quite young children can learn to meditate.

My sympathies on the despondent feeling creeping up along with your birthday... don't know what to say about that. I hope that a path that you can live with is revealed to you. In the meantime, I hope it helps to hear that you are obviously a kick-ass mom. :)

[patty]

Guess what!? Cutting playdough with scissors is an excellent small motor exercise! Do you think the meticulous Patrick would be happy with making those playdough ropes, cutting them to size with scissors, and forming letters?

Good luck...with everything.

PS. We moved 25 days ago. We still don't have internet. I'm using my husband's laptop and one of my new neighbor's intermittent wireless signal to peek at your site.

[Ms. Once]

I flunked scissors in nursery school. But, oddly enought, it doesn't seem the predeterminant of life failure one might otherwise think. I'm now proudly a college professor.
Of course, I do stay far away from scissors as often as possible. But I'm a whiz and a half with the paper cutter--a _truly_ dangerous contraption.

[EverestGirl]

Balls are much more dangerous than scissors or paint, so count yourself lucky. I'm missing one gorgeous lamp out of a pair in my living room. The Ball.
I'm sorry seems like such a lame thing to say...the things you have endured and how you come out on the other side continue to amaze me.
You are thought of.
As a future blogger ... maybe Patrick should consider the name:
Patrick Runs With Scissors

[Erica77777]

My parents like to tell a story about one day when I went to preschool and the class was using scissors (blunt-edged, of course) to cut out geometric shapes out of construction paper to hang on a pipe cleaner mobile.

My mother apparently got a call from my teacher, who told her that I apparently had a serious motor skill deficit that needed to be investigated by the special ed teacher. My mother looked at my pitiful art project in which I had clearly abandoned my scissors in favor of attempting to rip construction paper into the proper shapes (which never works). She asked my teacher, "Did you give her lefty scissors? She is left handed, after all."

Smart mom, dumb teacher.

[FlippyO]

I'm 42. I still can't cut in a straight line, much less shapes.

[e]

My son had awful fine motor skills until he was oooh...ten. He is otherwise very bright, but *luckily* (ha!) is not meticulous. He's more of a "that'll do!" type. Whch is worrying enough since he never does anything to the best of his ability, but means that he is very unstressed generally, which is probably better for him. Havign watched my children and others evolve over the last thirteen years, it strikes me that very bright children often have a motor lag- I reckon they spend so much time learning stuff and growing their brains, that they neglect basic motor skills.

There are ways to hone his fine motor skills, and basically it involves practice. Do you have one of those peg boards with plastic colored pegs, to build up picture mosaics? If you can get him interestedin that kind of thing, it might help.

His painting style sounds idiosyncratic and delightful if a little expensive. My four-year olds all went through a phase of obliterating beautiful drawings, either with paint or with black crayon. I think it's a power thing rather than quality control.

[Bonnie]

Oh, god, I can relate. When my son (now 14) was 3, he had his own White-Out pen after a particularly spectacular meltdown over the accidental miscoloring of Baby Bop ("But she should be GREEN! Not BLUE! GREEN!"). And then there was that time my mother had to rubberband a banana peel back onto the banana to stop the hysteria.

[Michelle]

My husband, when he was about Patrick's age, got hold of a pair of scissors and cut every single curtain in his entire house. To this day, his mother still does not let him "play" with scissors.
I guess it's too early to wish you a happy birthday?

[Vanessa]

Scissors are an ongoing issue with kids, it seems. I helped with my daughter's Brownie troop last year, and when we did craft projects, girls as old as 10 were throwing down their scissors in frustration and saying to me, "You cut this! I can't do it!" Little did they know that my scissor skills were only marginally better than theirs.

I'm also turning 35 in a few weeks (Nov. 10) and recently had the same "I will never have another baby" thought, although in my case it's because my husband died this summer. I'm trying to squash that thought down whenever it pops up, along with a lot of other thoughts in a similar "I will never" vein, but thoughts are persistent little buggers.

Lots and lots of hugs to you.

[Sally]

Oh my gosh - 35. I went through a "thing" because 35 fell right in the middle of our slew of loss and despair.
The only power I felt like had in the whole baby thing was that I would be the one to say "again?" or "not." and I felt like my age was going to rob me of that power and end it for me. Not fair.

Not to worry, mouse. As far as trying to have this baby is concerned, you do have many years left, although it's going to be a bit different because now they're going to encourage you to have genetic testing.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ha.
...

[Lisa V]

I can't cut in a straight line. That's why I became a hairdresser. I was a good one too, except when ears kept getting in the way. Now I'm in education. I wish Patrick was coming to our school. The stories would be so great.

[Kelly]

My son failed cutting. For what I thought was the same reason, who the hell gives a 3 or 4 year old scissors? And because I didn't doesn't that automatically prove the greatness in my parenting skill.

Of course a year later what we found out was that do to an abruption my child's brain was filled with lesions and that suddenly all of these things seemed out of reach. But proving that children, all of them, Patrick and my T, are amazing, my kid seemed to get every single one of those things in reach.

I have no idea why I shared that but it sort of made me weepy. Patrick reminds me of 6 1/2 year old so much at that age (albeit his obsession was music not letters) and for that I love your journal.

[Anita]

I freaked out after bleeding for 7 days after my last D&E. I know this is a stupid question, but are you doing ok emotionally? Are you thinking of calling the doc? WHen is your post op follow up?

[Bethany]

Oh yes, meticulous. I get that. Though mine manifests hers by just not trying something she may not be "perfect" at. We've done a lot of work and though she's still a perfectionist, she gets tha practice is part of the equation as well.

As a former preschool teacher I'm an advocate of getting the materials (including scissors) into kids hands as often as needed, but I myself have a very high shelf for things that I can't handle some days, so I'm offering you some alternatives to build scissor-using muscles sans scissors:

-transferring small beads or pom poms with tweezers (like from one bowl to another, you can make a game out of it if it bores Patrick.)
-ditto cotton balls with salad tongs. The idea here is that you want him to build dexterity in the muscles that will eventually handle scissors.
-those teeny, tiny little water droppers, like we used in high school biology and chemistry. Again he can transfer water from one cup to another or you can color the water and he can make designs (or letters!) on paper (coffee fliters work great.)

Ultimately, none of these are as dangerous as actual cutting, so he'll tire of them soon enough, but they may help on days you're not up to seeing flying scissors in your living room.

Taking off my teacher hat now. But by the way, I think Patrick is pretty special :).

[tasha]

I have never commented before, but i wanted to tell you how much i love your posts about Patrick. what a wonderful child you have. I sincerely hope that you get what you desire and am extremely happy you have what you do (if that makes sense?).

[bj]

Oh Julia: "Everything has been the same for 4 years" It hasn't right? That was always my fear about being childless -- I could see that 6 years after starting a new job, moving to a new city (I always had a the same guy, so meeting a new guy wasn't part of my change), I would start to feel like there was nothing new in my life.

But, it feels totally different with children. They are always changing; they're new, if not every day, at least every few months, and eventually, I guess it'll slow down to every year.

Keep us informed about Patricks learning curve with scisors :-).

bj

[Jenny]

I believe that infertility makes birthdays more sensitive. I've never cared about my age -- just a number, doesn't define me, etc. -- until last year's birthday, #38. Suddenly, I had reached the upper "38-40" category on all the infertility charts, and it hit me hard. (I have never cried on my birthday before, or at least not about the age I was turning.) After four useless IVFs, we know we will probably never get pregnant, even with treatment -- but somehow, 38 still hurt.

[robin]

"...but a small meticulous child is mostly a pain in the ass." i remember when my daughter was not yet two, and insisted on playing a counting game on a road trip from massachusetts to chicago. we would count in a round, but god forbid somebody screwed up the rules (rules known only to her, of course). there was hysteria, fury, rage, and a lunatic insistence that we start again...from the beginning, where it invariably happened again. we thenceforth referred to this game as "counting with a madman." i feel your pain.

[Chickenpig]

At the school I taught last there were two GREAT pairs of scissors that we purchased in case we had children with special needs. We couldn't leave them out with the rest of the safety scissors because fights would ensue. They had a large rounded top handle and a flat bottomed bottom handle so they could be pushed along a table, like fabric cutting scissors. The cutting end was very short so they could corner like a dream, and they were very sharp, but they were spring loaded and the blades were totally encased in plastic, nothing wider than a piece of paper or fabric could get anywhere near the blade. They worked for either left or right handed, or both handed if need be, and were large enough for me to use..which I did frequently while decorating bulletin boards. Patrick would not need to throw these babies, but if he did, they were all rounded and wouldn't do any damage. I wish I could remember the manufacturer, but I'm sure a search for "safety scissors" would work. A lot of the problems with kid scissors is that they aren't sharp enough to cut through the construction paper they use in school, especially gummed up with paint, glitter, and glue. The right tools make a WORLD of difference to a 3 year old. Also, an easel would help with your paint issues.

35 huh? I spent my 35 birthday opening up baby stuff because my mom threw me a combined baby shower/birthday party. I was big as a HOUSE :) I just turned 36 a couple of months ago, and now my babies are 10 1/2 months and cruising and talking...*sigh* how fast time flies....

[katie]

sorry about the sadness. i can't imagine how blue you must be feeling.

on a lighter note, your pps cracks me up...i, too, could not catch a ball. still can't. i was so bad, in 2nd grade, i got to go to remedial gym class for throwing and catching. still managed to graduate high school 5th in my class with a metric ton of AP credits and 2 years of calculus under my belt. but thank god that remedial gym class was there to up my catching abilitys from "sucks ass" to "eh, at least she's trying."

[pinkpoppies]

Umm -- you do know there are safety scissors for righties and lefties? Fiskars makes quite nice ones.

What you really have to worry about is when they start emphasizing their opinions with a pencil -- that brings one the heebie jeebies and all your mother's warnings about someone losing an eye.

Or eyeballing your rotary cutter -- sigh.

[Meli]

I just love your Patrick updates. He's so wonderful and funny.

Sorry about the sad. Hope it subsides soon so that you can enjoy your birthday.

[spacemom]

Soleil flunks scissors too, but Luna loves them. Apparently daycare has had to stop her. She will get frustrated when other kids can't use them correctly and she takes them away from the kid, cuts the thing out for the kid, hand the child the paper and then walks off with the scissors. Scary or what?

[Katy]

Sometimes when I talk about my bright 5yo w/ other moms, I feel like I have to qualify her talents by pointing out the things that she does not do well, which include (surprise!): scissors, pencil grasp, and ANYTHING involving a ball or monkey bars or just, um, coordination. It's fun but challenging to have a quirky kid.

[runnerwoman]

When I started kindergarten I knew how to read, but couldn't operate scissors. The teacher didn't know what to do with me. I think it's pretty common, and I'd rather have the kid who can read.

[Tiffany]

The thing I love is that he made a plan and executed it. This makes him more skilled than a lot of the art students I went to college with.

I know these tantrums. He's trying to teach himself how to write right now actually. I'm kind of losing my mind. Nicolaus reminds me of that guy from Sesame Street who used to slam his head on the piano, "OHHH I'LL NEVER GET IT RIGHT."

I'm so sorry about the sadness.

[Janis]

Can you send Patrick over to teach my 7 year old perfect penmanship b/c he has the exact opposite of perfect!!! (but he can catch a ball) : )

[Leggy]

My son also has perfectionist (oops, I mean meticulous) tendancies and he gets very down on himself when he can't do things just sooo. I can't figure out where he got that from, because I'm just so laid back, you know?
I'm sorry things are still rough, both physically and mentally. I hear you on the 35 thing- did that in July. And its just a number, but its "that" number- you know, that whole "advanced maternal age" thing. I just can't believe how long this has dragged on and here I am (you are) still searching for kid #2. So I hear you, believe me I do.
FWIW, I'm glad you are talking about it. I only know you from inside the computer, but I get the sense from your writing that you are somewhat reserved in expressing emotions. But it just comes back to bite you (or in my experience, me) in the ass later on.
Assvice now over.

Oh, my GOD, Chickenpig, this is without a doubt the MOST tone-deaf thing I have ever, EVER read on the blog of a woman struggling to have a child:

"35 huh? I spent my 35 birthday opening up baby stuff because my mom threw me a combined baby shower/birthday party. I was big as a HOUSE :) I just turned 36 a couple of months ago, and now my babies are 10 1/2 months and cruising and talking...*sigh* how fast time flies...."

Julia TOLD US she is SAD. SAD about facing her 35th birthday without another child. Can you see ANYTHING just the TINIEST bit WRONG with what you said above?

This blog is not about YOU. It's about Julia, who is kind enough to share her life and feelings with us. So maybe it would be better if you didn't repay her generosity by taking a dump on it like the above.

[Vanessa]

I love your child. Thanks for the Patrick stories. It's a great way to start my morning.

[Denise]

Hi Julia,

I'm so sorry you are sad over your birthday and I really can't blame you. It's a hard time your going through right now and that I'm sure complicates how you feel. But, if you remember, the note you sent me a few months ago when I was so despondent over my 3rd mc and the fact that I was 36. You gently reminded me and reassured me that I still had plenty of time and 36 was not the end of the world. And you are right, it's not. One day at a time, one step at a time.

As for bleeding after your D&C.. with my last D&E I had it done on 8/9 I bled medium to heavy flow until 8/29 when I hemmoraged, after that was under control I continued to bleed heavily. On 9/15 my doctor wanted to hospitalize me for severe anemia (I refused) and the bleeding FINALLY stopped on 9/21. So, 6 weeks. And joy of joys, I just started CD 1 yesterday, 10/10.

Hang in there!!!

I absolutely LOVE Patrick stories!!!

Denise

[DebbieS]

Patrick is such a pip! He's not a lefty by chance, is he? I second the brilliant motion of having him cut letters out of Play-Do =)

I'm sorry that you have to feel so crummy right before a major birthday. That definitely rubs salt in the wound. I just turned 35, too, and for the first time was dreading my birthday. It was my first without my mom. And I normally love my birthday like a 5 year-old loves their birthday. Well, I don't quite know what happened, but it ended up being one of the nicest birthdays I've had. So I hope that happens for you, too.

[elsimom]

Gifted and coordinated sometimes do not go together - that's for sure. You know this, I'm sure, but gifted kids tend to have a low frustration threshold - they are used to "getting it" the first time, and struggle is really, well, a struggle! He cracks me up with this letter love.
Sorry about the sad - will be thinking of you.

[The Aitch]

Love you and that kid:)

[Diane]

I turned 35 in July and I just want to say that it is not that old. At least that's what I keep telling myself. I cannot have kids right at this time for other reasons (money/school), but plan to start trying next fall (when I'll be 36). Then I hope to fit in a couple before I turn 40, if I'm lucky. I try really hard not to dwell on what the future holds. Or, you know, how old I'll be when I finally have grandkids. If my kids get knocked up in high school....well that's just a bonus! My mom had kids until she was 42. I still feel really young and keep holding on to that. I hope you keep trying until you really truly can't anymore. There are other "oldies" out there who will be right there with you. We can write to each other about our issues with juggling pushing a baby stroller and walker at the same time!

[Ollie]

I'm STILL not trusted with scissors. They are just so pointy and erratic and make you do things like cut your own bangs and attempt sewing.

...and 35 was the hardest one for me, too. I've been here for a month now and it's not feeling much better, although I can now tell people how old I am without breaking down. I'm hoping yours passes with far more grace than mine did. May 35 be your most glorious year (see how old I am? I use the word "glorious" now...)

[Audrey]

Yeah, as a pediatric nurse, I agree, a small meticulous person can be a pain in the ass, but damn, they do some cute things. (Though please remind me of this when I'm sitting there doing a vision screening and a four year old who does not know his letters the way Patrick does insists on deciding if I'm pointing to a ball or circle before moving on.)

Tracing letters in the air at two? This kid is a genius, I swear.

*hugs and hope you feel better*

[Annie]

Turning 35 was bad, but 40 is much worse. I still can't bring myself to say it. Also, start preparing yourself to hear these words from medical personel, "Advanced Maternal Age." I thought, "Hey, I'm 35 not 70! My sister had a baby at 41. Give me a break people!"

[luolin]

It occurs to me that I may have been a meticulous child at times (no, mother, you may not help, I have to do it myself, and it has to be perfect...).

My high school AP Biology lab partner was meticulous. Now he is a well-off (and as far as I know, happy) opthalmologist.

[Bihari]

Oh, I do love meticulous men. Patrick takes the proverbial cake--lovely child!--but my husband is close behind. One day he was about to tackle some grim problem in the clinic where we both work, and when I asked him what he was doing he said, "What I do best: I'm going to nail down the details and surround them with micrographic handwriting."

But Patrick is still the best.

[amanda]

what about those all plastic safty scissors? they won't cut cloth or cats ears or whatnot but they can cut paper with them
http://www.discountschoolsupply.com/Product/ProductDetail.aspx?es=526ALIZPOHS&product=17179
might work?
he gets to cut you get to keep all the pets and table cloths in one peice. it's win win!

[Meramoo]

I'm going off on a tangent here, but Patrick might enjoy sewing on plastic canvas with yarn. You can get plastic needles so it's quite safe, and make all sorts of fun geometric patterns and things.

Hope you feel better soon.

[Sparklykatt]

Ah yes, scissors. I clearly remember about a year ago telling one of Noah's teachers that I thought she was insame when she expressed concern about Noah's lack of scissor skills. He was 2 1/2 for gods sake. Every teacher and therapist since then has been concerned. I just laugh at them.

For god sakes, they know my son, what makes them think I would be crazy enough to let him loose in my house with scissors. That is insanity.

On that note however, yesterday I walked in to the living room to find him holding a pair of kitchen scissors (damn, when did he get tall enough to reach the back of that drawer) and trying to cut open a bag of cookies. He doesn't lack in the problem solving skills. He happily handed them to me and let me cut open the bag.

Damn, not only are they showing him how to use them but teaching him what they are good for too.

damn, damn, damn

[Emily Drew]

I'm so glad to read today's post. I was very worried about you and actually came to your website today to get your e-mail so see how you were doing. Imagine my delight (muted, I'm at work) when I saw your post! I know you're not as well as could be, but you are blogging again, and that is a relief, at the very least.

Do you have safety scissors for Patrick? They don't cut things that shouldn't be cut (oh like, the cat's tail) as easily and when flung across the room, only make a dent rather than a slash.

Painting... hmmm. Was he going for cubism or immpressionism?

[Kel]

I'm sorry you are sad and know it doesn't do any good to remind you that your IF issues are not age related, but I've done it anyway. Praise be to the older parent in my book and you are just a pup, really. None of that written to dismiss how you are feeling which is, hello, completely appropriate. This is a bad time (whatever your age) and I hope it ends for you soon.

My rather meticulous 4 year old will now state that he won't do something because it would be "boring". I now (finally) understand that this is his code word for "I won't do it perfectly, so instead of getting into it with you about trying... I'll dismiss the whole thing as unworthy of an attempt." Good times.

Hang in there.

Kel

[FishyGirl]

When my oldest was about 2 my babysitter told me she needed to work on scissor skills (the babysitter specialized in infants/toddlers). I looked at her like she was insane - scissors for a 2 year old? Right. So she bought my little one a pair of plastic safety scissors that won't cut anything but paper - not even hair. Those might be worth a try.

I am so sorry about the sadness - but you are entitled to feel sad as long as you want. You are a lot stronger than I am. Do consider that circumstances can cause clinical depression to develop, which of course would only compound things for you. I wish you peace.