Latitudes

When I drive I point the car in the general direction I want to go and then I just... drive there. When Steve is behind the wheel it is somehow much more complicated and involves near constant calculations concerning not only his own speed but the velocity of every car around him, possible lane changes for the next three miles, law enforcement probabilities and minute mirror adjustments with topographic shifts. I don't know if any of this makes him a better driver than I am, but it certainly makes him a lot less chatty. The drive to Chicago was pretty boring, what with Steve silently playing Le Mans and Patrick noting each and every mile marker. Finally I said, "This is boring" and Steve obliged me by offering what can only be described as a gambit, an honest-to-goodness conversational gambit: if we had to live anywhere other than Minnesota where would I want to live?

I have probably told you this story before but what the hell, we are growing old together aren't we? No reason we can't start repeating ourselves. Steve and I originally moved here because I wanted to leave Chicago. Nothing against Chicago, you understand, I was just at that stage of life when I was convinced that true and ever-lasting happiness was waiting for me. Somewhere else. So we went to a bar one night (this was back when I used to drink white wine. go figure) and we made two lists on two cocktail napkins of places to which we would be willing to move. Since Steve and I have nothing in common beyond this fierce, almost mystical, love we share; it took about seven or eight cities on both our lists before we had a match: Mpls-St. Paul. So here we are and there is no real reason why we couldn't move somewhere else tomorrow, apart from the fact that it will take us at least six months just to pack the garage.

As I considered Steve's question I was surprised to discover that my original seven cities were no longer very appealing to me. San Francisco is beautiful and I still love it muchly, but yesterday I watched a gray fox chase a squirrel up a tree while a turkey and fawn arranged themselves artistically in the foreground. That tree right there, actually, but it is just one of the many you can find here in the Northwoods. And when we want to drive from the Minnesotan equivalent of Union Square to Marin (work with me) at four o'clock on a Friday we just hop into our car and go, secure in the fact that any traffic will be comparatively light and we will probably know all of the other drivers anyway. Nice chance to wave to old friends when the interstate slows to 50. It is very pleasant here.

However, when pressed, I decided I could be happy in Baltimore (home of my alma mater, forever dear to my heart), Seattle (rainy and close-ish to my brother and an ocean) or possibly Denver. I waffled on Denver and I am waffling still. I like the city and the mountains but it is so damned sunny all the time. Steve pointed out it would be good for my hair, though, so it's still on the list.

And would you like to know where Steve would be willing to move?

Jackson, Wyoming.

I don't know why I found this so amusing but I really did. I'm over there in Baltimore and Steve is finding himself in a town in Wyoming.

However, this was not where I was going with this. Steve's mention of Wyoming elicited the fact that I have never been to Wyoming. Or Idaho. Or Montana for that matter. So I suggested that we might want to pack up the car later this summer and do a little back-of-the-car camping trip. Steve doubted my sincerity (just because I have never gone camping with him it does not mean I have never gone camping) but I managed to assure him that I think it sounds delightful. We broke out the atlas when we got home and I started looking at possible routes West. I was only able to look for about two seconds before Patrick commandeered it (Patrick. he likes maps. a lot) and began to plan his own route: "So what we'll need to do is drop down 35 here to 14 and then cut over to Pierre... ."

Detailed trip logistics aside (Patrick's route would take us through every small town in the West and would last about four months) we had decided that we would do this.

So I mentioned it to my mother. And she laughed. "You're going to be pregnant with twins and go camping?" she asked.

I said, "Certainly! Why not? It will be fine. I might be pregnant, not incapacitated by two broken legs" in that peevish tone women reserve from adolescence for just such conversations with their mothers. And actually it would be fine and we don't hold with all that cotton-wool molly-coddling over here. Sure I threw up in Target yesterday but did I quail? Did I falter? No! I finished shopping for the blasted birthday party goodie bags, weak and trembling though I might have been.   

Where the hell was I?

Oh right. The POINT (at last) is that prior to my mother mentioning it, I had completely forgotten that I was, in fact, pregnant. At no moment during the days Steve and I talked about this little jaunt did it ever cross my mind that I may be X weeks pregnant at the time and anxious for middle-of-the-night bathroom access, if nothing else. Not once. As many times as I have gotten annoyed with Steve over the years for forgetting that I was pregnant (which is many) I am suitably chastened to discover that I am capable of forgetting, too. Apparently I am perfectly aware of the morning sickness, the number of hours since my last ultrasound (250) and the number of hours remaining until my next one (108) but I have not synthesized this information into any real concept of the future. Who knew?

New REDBOOK post up.

Oh, and where would you live if you had to move?

Comments

[Jackie]

I'm pleasantly surprised to see all the Baltimore love in this post, as I am a happy Baltimorean!

As for moving, my range is limited-- has to be East Coast, has to be mild-to-moderate winters, has to be urban. Really, we're talking Philadelphia, possibly DC, possibly NYC. Atlanta was a top contender for a few years awhile back, but has dropped since.

[Megan]

HATE where I live now - even though I was born here and (mostly) raised here. Came back with teeth gritted and they're down to the roots now so I've been trying desperately to move for the last year or so. So Trish, glad you found happiness here, but good lord woman, you are aware it's going to be 97 degrees this weekend, right? Where do I want to go? Places I've lived - Moss Beach, CA; Eagle River, AK; London, England. Places I haven't - Oregon and Washington (state). Cold, clammy, foggy, rainy and right at sea level please. Basically the polar opposite to what I have now.

[liz]

You can certainly go to Jackson, WY without ever camping one night. I drove my two children out there by myself from Illinois because my husband did not want to go and it was fabulous. (I was not pregnant however.) We did Yellowstone too and put 4000 miles on the car and stayed in hotels and lodges. I would have gone up to Glacier NP too but we had to get back for school to start.

[Molly Chase]

My husband wanted Baltimore and I wanted D.C., so we compromised and moved to Prince George's County, MD, which we both hate. However, if we were going to pick up and move (which we aren't) I would like Portland, Salt Lake City, or Austin; my husband would like Seattle, Denver, or someplace where he could take up hunting and fishing again.

[Sadie]

Not a lot of Easterners represented here...I am a born-and-bred New England girl and while I have loved visits to the South (Nashville, Louisville, Atlanta), I don't think I'd ever feel at home in a place without distinct changes of season and more specifically, cold snowy Christmases. That rules a lot of the country out altogether. I second the suggestions for Portland Maine, which is a surprisingly cosmopolitan city and yet so accessible and laid-back.

Although I could totally rock Paris, too. And all the walking I'd do there would negate the effects of the croissants.

[Whitney]

I would like to move to Boulder, CO. Of course, I'm not really used to the cold- or the snow... it hasn't snowed here in 5 years. But I don't want to move there for the snow... they have bike roads everywhere... so when I wasn't freezing my durn tail off, I could just throw the babe in the Burley, hop on the bike and go wherever.

[Denise]

My husband and I met in Chicago and we had the same conversation there (hey, probably in some bar in Bucktown two tables down from you). We ended up near Boston.

If money were no object, I would choose NYC.

But since money is, sadly, a consideration, if we were to move, we would go back to Chicago. I loved it there.

[bethany1023]

I lived in Missoula, Montana for some time, and LOVED it. I would love to have a ranch out there, and work from home. Because I'm sure they have WiFi if you live on a ranch in MT.

I would winter in South Carolina or Florida, that way I could have both the mountains and the ocean with no commute.

sigh.

[JB]

Camping Smamping. I love Jackson Hole and you will too. The Tetons, Yellowstone, Jenny Lake -- just about the most beautiful places on the planet. And there is so much to do. From hiking to biking to rafting to horse-back to fancy dining and shopping.

But you are pregnant and camping amidst a gabillion other people is only exciting when someone thinks they've seen a grizzly bear. Also, that drive is gruesome and ALWAYS ALWAYS EVERYTIME a windshield gets cracked. So, fly. (Or take the train!! Right from MN) Directly into Jackson. And rent a car and stay at one of these absolutely FABULOUS places. If these are too fabulous for your pocket book there are 800 million other options, that all give you access to your very own bathroom in the middle of the night...and a shower of your own too!

http://www.gtlc.com/lodging.aspx

http://www.nationalparkreservations.com/yellowstone.htm?gclid=CK2J5JPv74wCFRe4Igod5hmIAw

http://www.fourseasons.com/jacksonhole/?source=gawjhw02a&kw=yellowstone+lodge&adgroup=Destination_Yellowstone_Lodge&creative=885389372&_s_ksid=j402eamdaiqMjzEE

One of my most magical memories is taking the chair lift up to the top of Jackson Hill resort, on a July moonlit night and walking down the mountain, in that blazing moonlight, with the flowers and the fireflies and MOOSE!! It was breathtaking.
--J

[lynn]

Jujubee - I live in Boston, too, and spent 5 years in Ann Arbor for grad school. I loved it - very fun town, lots to do, the climate isn't bad, really (less snow than Boston, but colder maybe, and more overcast days).

I feel pretty well anchored in Boston, but I've played the what-if fantasy game too. I would hate to live too far away from family/friends, but if I could take those considerations out of the mix (say, if I were only moving for a year or two), I'd pick one of:
- Provence
- Holland (near, but maybe not in, Amsterdam)
- Albuquerque
- Hawaii
- Australia/New Zealand (somewhere out there, anyway, never been but looks awesome)
- Vancouver

[Becky]

Union Square to Marin is a lovely way to spend a few hours on a Friday afternoon!

I'd live in Mill Valley. Or Sausalito, except on weekends in the summer.

[lynn]

Oh - I should add, I am not the outdoors-y type but I did go canoeing/camping when I was 4 months pregnant. Not a problem at that stage, though I didn't have to help when it turned out we needed to carry our canoes over a dam.

[Anne]

Un-lurking to reply to:
"Is there anything good in Iowa?"

We lived in Iowa City (home of the Univ of Iowa) and loved it...a liberal enclave in a mostly rural state...few town/gown issues that we noticed...3 hrs from Chicago, 5 from the cities, and 2ish (depending on how fast we drove) to Madison.

We have a geographical area set for when I'm done w/ school, but since it covers the area from Minnesota/Iowa to Maine (but no further south than MD), it's a pretty big area. :)

[katie]

Paris. Don't even have to think twice about that one.

I guess in the states, NYC if I could afford it, or else out west, Seattle, Portland, someplace like that where there is urban life and you're near a beach. My husband, however, wants to move to Texas. Please somebody kill me if I ever find myself living there. If only for the fact that I would be in the same state as my mother-in-law.

[Elaina]

If you actually do take a trip to Wyoming, please let me know if you'd be interested in meeting! I never in my wildest dreams thought that you would ever come to Wyoming and I find it somewhat ironic that there is a For Sale sign in front of my house as I am planning my move to California.

Congrats on the continuing happy twin pregnancy. Off to check REDBOOK for the latest. :)

[Kristen]

I moved to Brooklyn from DC last summer, and I wanted to move back almost immediately! Ideally, though, I would live in Santa Fe, New Mexico (also amazing for one's hair). I've always had a thing for the twin cities, too, because of the music scene there in my youth--and Paul Westerberg still lives there. Your description of the fauna in the area makes it even more appealing. I also like Baltimore, which I affectionately term "Bommer."

[Trish]

Durango, Co.

[Jackie]

I love the upper midwest with all my heart. We live in Ann Arbor, MI right now, and it's so nice but could easily see us back in Madison, WI (where I lived throughout college and grad school) or in Chicago or Min/St. Paul.

[Natalee]

The Carolinas. I've never been there, but am in love with them from afar. If I had to choose cities, I'd say Charleston, SC or Wilmington, NC. The ocean and southern charm-I couldn't ask for more!

[runnerwoman]

I wouldn't move, since I have a probably unhealthy desire to live near my family.

I have to say, though, that Idaho is lovely. Especially Boise. I was drug there somewhat against my will a few years ago for a wedding. But I had a lovely time. The scenery is nice, there are tons of things to do, and some great food.

[Jenn (dish)]

Hmmm, good question. Hubby and I both love San Diego, but it's way too far from family at the moment. But we won't eliminate it from a longer term list. I also love New Mexico (Santa Fe and Taos area) and have enjoyed time spent in Maine (but that is a non option for us as a couple because hubby hates cold weather). And I have vetoed anywhere with exceptionally large bugs (Florida through Texas along the southern coast).

[Nancy]

DK and I always talk about moving back to San Francisco some day (though now that we are proud apartment owners in NYC as of three days ago, the "go west" refrain has dissapated somewhat). But on that note, Carmel Valley, CA is visually stunning with a great community of interesting people. Portland, ME has always made me want to move to a town. Improbably, Seattle croons a little bit of a siren song for me though I base that feeling entirely on rumors of good, clean living in a manageable city. I certainly wouldn't throw London or Paris out of bed, though part of me calls, Madrid! Madrid! Ah well. Nice to daydream. I think we need a city or at least close proximity to one, despite my occasional declaration that we should buy a converted farmhouse and live off the fat of the land. Can you imagine how long we'd last with my gardening skills? Not long, is what I'm saying.

[Lucy]

As an Aussie who spent 6 years in mid-Michigan before moving to Denver just over a year ago, I can confirm that this fabulous climate (so much sun!) does amazing things for ones hair! I absolutely love it here. I'd move back to Melbourne in a second for the right price, but for right now, Denver is home and I couldn't be happier about it!

[Kim]

Am living in southern California currently, for the summer, but am from Louisville, KY. I might actually be living in Chicago come August, and it is at the top of my list. I could definitely live in California, for sure, but it's the same as Denver - it's so damn sunny all the time! I need a good thunderstorm now and then!

[Jennifer]

Currently living in the NYC-area. If money was no object? Then I would live in Hawaii. It is so beautiful there and the slower-paced, happier lifestyle so appealing.

I also love San Diego for its perfect weather.

[Michele]

When my husband and I talk about moving we tend to keep our options within the state of Minnesota since our families are here. We've been looking toward St. Cloud and the cities as it would be very easy for my husband to transfer. His mother, on the other hand, is the hardest part of it all as she still hasn't cut the cord and would have a fit if we were more than a half hour from her.

When we daydream we look west to Seattle and Portland or to Madison, Wisconsin. Having friends and family in all of those places who keep telling us how much they love it.

I still miss the places I've lived like Wilmington, Delaware and Dallas, Texas - but only when it's -40F and the snow drifts are starting to block the exits. ;)

[Heidi]

I moved from Seattle to Montana 15 years ago and ain't nobody gonna get me to leave...

[GirlSeven]

I presently live in Seattle, spent many years in Montana, and have also visited Jackson, WY a few times. I think all of them are fabulous.

[Katie]

I used to live in Boston - I liked it there. I also like it where I live now, and I loved living in London. I am a bit of a city girl, though.

Comment on the Redbook post (still can't be bothered to register) - actually there is plenty of evidence that repeated first trimester scans improve your chances if you are a recurrent miscarrier. I can point you to the articles if you like.

[ErikaMSN]

Northern New England, western MA, or RI. For some reason I have a prejudice against CT--not visiting there, but something about the idea of living there. I have no idea why.

Portland (if I could live in the city) or Seattle, but not the burbs of either. Corvallis or Eugene would be great.

Or Italy.

We moved to Madison for my job 7 yrs ago, and I never figured we'd stay here very long. For the first few years after our daughter was born, I was actively looking for jobs in NE or the PNW--closer to grandparents, on both sides. But suddenly I've realized that we're pretty content here. Reasonably short commute (30-40 min on the bus), amenities of the city w/o being too big, good schools, job lets me be mostly a free agent, etc. I was in Philadelphia last month, and while I liked it, after a while the NOISE!! was way too much. I realized I've become quite the small-town girl...

Actually, I think (oddly) I'd like rural North Dakota, except for the rampant Christian Nationalism, but I can't see that happening for us...

[Anne]

My husband and I live in Denver now. I'm a native Chicagoan and so is my husband(well, from the suburbs), but since I lived in the city during college and he never did, he hates, hates, hates Illinois (he's also a road bike racer, and of course Colorado is like Mecca for cyclists). I would like to move back to IL because my mother is there, and it would be great to have grandma babysitting services. I also like the city, but probably wouldn't want to live there with a wee one. I like Denver ok, but am not thrilled with it. I actually went to graduate school in Salt Lake, and despite the Mormons, I would put my money there for the whole "western lifestyle" thing--MUCH closer to the mountains (and ski areas) than Denver is, and it's smaller, cheaper, and friendlier. And I miss a couple of the restaurants there like nobody's business--Fresco and Bangkok Thai, yum...

My "wish list" of places to move? Portland OR. (I must be weird, but I love the humidity. No, it's not great for your hair, but it's soooo good for your skin--everyone out here in the west is all dried up and wrinkly by their 40s because of the dryness and incessant sunshine.) Or Kyoto, Japan (lived in Japan before and loved it, but this would mean we would have to sell the house and find a home for the dog, neither of which I want to do right now).

Yikes, sorry for the rambly post!

Good luck on your continuing pregnancy!

[cherylc]

You also have a lot of readers who have lived in Seattle. I live in Seattle, was raised here, and never want to leave. I'd live in other parts of the world temporarily, but if I was moving in this area, I'd go someplace less urban. Probably Issaquah, where my sisters live. I notice no one else has suggested this small town in the foothills of the Cascades! But it's beautiful.

[Melissa]

I'm in Baltimore, probably near your alma mater in that I live in Charles Village.

I miss Boston quite terribly. I miss the accent, the walkable beach so close, the easy access (by ferry) to water, the local music scene and the proper change of seasons. Although I like Baltimore/DC, I am not fan of the blink-or-you'll-miss-it spring and fall. After six years in the mid-Atlantic, I still can't get used to the humidity in the summer.

[Becky]

The only place my DH and I have ever even mentioned living outside of our state is Florida...more specifically Orlando...more specifically employed as Disney entertainment lawyers. So, yeah, unlikely. Also, I hate the heat. Especially wet heat. Especially wet heat with bright beating sun. But I'd do it to make him happy.

[megan]

jackson? wyoming? hmmm.
maybe you should just stick with the seattle idea and then drive further north to vancouver, bc....o canada. . .

[sheilah]

For me, I would move back to Seattle anytime. It is my home and where my family is. Or the Portland area where we lived for a few years. I also liked living in Colorado Springs and Reno.

Reno is conveniently located to the Sierra Nevada mtns and Lake Tahoe which are gorgeous. Yet it is a city that never sleeps so if you wake up and 3AM and want to get around some strangers smoking cigarettes while sitting in front of a slot machine for hours, you can.

And as for Colorado Springs...it is just pretty there; again close to mountains and close enough to Denver if there is anything culturally that you are acravin' and can't find in Colo Spgs you can probably find it.

[Molly]

Skip Denver. You're a long ways from the mountains and the air is terrible. If you want mountains and sun-bleached hair, go for Salt Lake City instead.
Almost everyone in Seattle is originally from, or their parents or grandparents are from, Minnesota or the Dakotas. That should tell you something about the place. It doesn't rain in July or August, and anyways, you don't have to shovel rain. But your house payments will double or triple, and you will spend a good chunk of your life sitting in traffic, and not waving at your friends, either.

[Anne Glamore]

Jackson is awesome and you can drive up to see Old Faithful which would tickle Patrick, I think.

As for moving, Charlottesville Virginia would be way up there for us.

[Ellen]

One time I thought it would be just dandy to go camping with friends while I was five months pregnant. Worst. Mistake. EVER. In addition to the physical discomfort, I was stone sober laying in my tent listening to someone nearby sing "Comfortably Numb" in an off-key-very-drunk manner and playing their guitar in an also off-key-very drunk manner and it nearly drove me to the edge.

[Celeste]

Pregnant camping...not fun. Did it last summer at 7 mnths. and was miserable. I hated everything about pregnancy though and am not the trooper that you seem to be in dealing with such things.

I have to say, I never thought I'd end up here in Asheville, NC. I love it. You get the four equal seasons, the mountains, the arts as well as small town charm. We moved here by way of San Francisco and before that LA, Atlanta, and NYC. We've lived all over the map. This is definitely the place I want our children to grow up.

Greenville, SC is another neat and beautiful city close by I wouldn't mind living. Portland would be my third.

[Scheherazade]

Edinburgh or somewhere down in the West Country.

[cursingmama]

holy crap thats a lot of comments

Up North - on the big lake preferably. It would be best if we were independently wealthy since the job options aren't really that lucrative - or retired.

Actually, thats where we intend on retiring.

[anne nahm]

Thinking good thoughts for you and if life gets me down, I can snicker into my collar that you are pregnant and camping.

Excuse me. *snerk*

Ahem. La Jolla, Ca. Or possibly Avila Beach, Ca.

[Anna]

Lived in Atlanta with the hubs before we were married and loved it. I like Albuquerque, too; never been to Seattle, but "I hear things." Maybe North or South Carolina. I love the south...

Glad to hear your trip was pleasant and NBHHY. :)

[Annika]

Our dream is to move to Pioneer Town, but barring that I think I'd move to Chicago. I lived there for almost two years and loved it. (For reference, I live in L.A. now. I like it here. I grew up in New York, which I love, and I've lived in Pittsburgh and assorted smaller towns.)

[Julie M]

The mention of Steve's fondness for the West reminded me that he and my husband have the love of bow hunting big game in common. He may be interested in this new invention that appeared in Pop. Science last month: http://www.popsci.com/popsci/technology/0721e8ee82c82110vgnvcm1000004eecbccdrcrd.html

Also, I am done with family building, after 5 years and 2 med tx's, we have two healthy, non-carrier boys (neither has my 20/21 bt), the last of which was born 2 weeks ago. I am thrilled to be done with this stage of life and I hope this pregnancy does the same for you. Best of luck.

[Catherine]

Live in the Denver burbs now. It is soul-less, fields and fields of beige houses. What's over that yonder hill? More beige houses.

I'd go to New Orleans, Chicago, Portland. I think growing up here, I crave humidity. Husband would go anywhere with great public transportation (which Denver also doesn't have).

[Mandy]

If you were to split the difference between Denver and Jackson, you'd likely find yourself very near me - think the home of Colorado State University. The traffic isn't bad, the weather is gorgeous and it isn't as busy as Denver - which is still only an hour away.

I'm just saying.

[Leslie]

Yet another Chicagoan checking in - perhaps we should have a party?

I have lived in Central IL, Tampa, Denver, France and Chicago and have visited a trillion places in-between. I'd go back to Denver in a second! The old part of the city is gorgeous! Full of character and lovely people and tall trees - unlike the suburban sprawl that has consumed the outskirts (yes beige beige beige)

Austin, TX is a wonderful place too. Nice people, WONDERFUL music, and the best pancakes I've ever had. Not as humid as Houston (blech) not soul-less like Dallas.

And if we can leave the continent, the Midi region in France was equally lovely. Great pace for living too.

[Leslie]

Yet another Chicagoan checking in - perhaps we should have a party?

I have lived in Central IL, Tampa, Denver, France and Chicago and have visited a trillion places in-between. I'd go back to Denver in a second! The old part of the city is gorgeous! Full of character and lovely people and tall trees - unlike the suburban sprawl that has consumed the outskirts (yes beige beige beige)

Austin, TX is a wonderful place too. Nice people, WONDERFUL music, and the best pancakes I've ever had. Not as humid as Houston (blech) not soul-less like Dallas.

And if we can leave the continent, the Midi region in France was equally lovely. Great pace for living too.