January 19th

I have a due date. Of course, it is a due date with an asterisk because they do not let twin pregnancies go to 40 weeks, or even 39 weeks. So we are actually due right around Christmas. When you are overjoyed to be having a baby there is really no BAD time to have one; unless, of course, that time is Christmas. And it is not BAD so much as less than ideal. Just because... well you know. You were seven once. Remember your birthday? And remember Christmas? Wasn't it nice how they weren't at the exact same time (unless of course they were, in which case, how did that work out for you?)

One of my best coping mechanisms during the last, um, [quantity] pregnancies was to ignore them. I took whatever I was prescribed, scheduled my next whatever, worried more or less constantly just under the surface but as far as I was able I went about my day. I would tell my mom and my brother and maybe a couple of close friends (and you, of course) but apart from my online updates I never mentioned it. It was as if we hoped we had conceived but it was too soon to be sure if we had. For, like, three months.

The only thing that could not be ignored on a daily basis was the morning sickness, which varied by pregnancy from irritating to debilitating. I can remember lying in bed one night during the last pregnancy, WILLING myself to thing of something that would not nauseate me. Think of a meadow, think of a nice calm meadow, I kept repeating, but my mind produced seascapes - heaving, storm-tossed waves - and scenes from a busy restaurant kitchen - have you ever worked in a restaurant? then you know - until I had to bolt to the bathroom. DISgusting. Between realizing I was pregnant with twins (which quite honestly, for me, was the day it became obvious that the home pregnancy line failed to go away after the trigger shot) and week six when the vomiting usually kicks in I was really, really worried that the reportedly increased morning sickness would kill me. I was afraid that I would actually expire, just like poor Charlotte Bronte.

I was surprised to discover that the nausea really has been quite manageable. Every day (including today) I wake up, brush my teeth, start to make a nice cup of tea, and then race to the bathroom with a glass of water to throw up. This lasts for about ten minutes and then I have breakfast. For about a month (maybe 6 weeks) I repeated this routine before lunch, dinner and bedtime, which sounds kinda awful but in the interim I felt fine. Now I am down to throwing up before breakfast and dinner. I have had pregnancies where every second of every day was a misery, so to get hours in which I feel normal and can eat a sandwich is a blessing indeed. You would think all those sandwiches would have added up by now but somehow I have this one pound I keep gaining and losing and that's it. Sometimes I am -1, sometimes 0, sometimes +1. I have recently augmented my already sugar, protein, vegetable and butter-filled diet with: grilled cheese at bedtime, fried eggs and bacon at breakfast, and mint chocolate chip ice cream both mid-morning and mid-afternoon. I switched to whole milk and it's not like you burn all that many calories sitting on the floor racing Matchbox cars. So I am optimistic that I should start gaining weight soon. Which is good because I read that book you recommended (well, I read the first book I could find by Dr. Luke, which was specifically about avoiding preterm labor but the one about multiples is coming via Interlibrary Loan) and as far as I can tell the only thing standing between the fetbabies and certain death is my ability to 1) drink water, 2) lie on my left side all day and 3) gain 35 pounds before 30 weeks. Since I can already do 1 & 2 like a pro I am concentrating on the latter.    

The (what was it?) 28, 29 mature follicles I had during the last IVF cycle increased my ovaries to monstrous proportions. As recently as two weeks ago the nice Mayo technician said, "Whoa! Look at those things!" During the early ultrasounds I sometimes had trouble getting Doreen to focus on the good stuff because she was fascinated by measuring the ovaries, which as best as I recall averaged a rather impressive 10 cm apiece. When you add that to all the fluid that leaked out of 'em and loitered in my abdomen like so many allied tradespeople at a wharf, you would not be far off in describing me as instantly rotund. But fluid and ovaries are not uteruses and embryos so I did not look sweetly pregnant so much as unpleasantly bloated. I put on elastic waisted skirts, drank all the blue Gatorade Patrick did not steal (Patrick would walk through fire for just one drop of delicious electrolytes) and ignored it. In the past two weeks, however, it has become impossible to ignore the fact that my abdomen starts swelling right where my bra strap would be if I had not accidentally detonated all of my bras within seconds of the positive pregnancy test; and I can no longer blame my ovaries as they have finally admitted defeat. I look like I am about 16 weeks pregnant, a fact which my OB graciously confirmed during my first OB on Friday (first! OB! appointment! huzzah!) I felt better about this (not that I ever felt bad about it, to be honest) when they gave me my bonus ultrasound (my doctor says it is too unreliable to check the heartbeats with twins via Doppler so she just popped me in with Doreen for five minutes) and I finally realized that the fetii are RIGHT THERE. Like, here is my belly button and just below it are 13a and 13b, stacked and separated like a split-level ranch house.

This is as far as I have gotten with accepting the fact that we are having babies: how I feel physically and how I look. The whole twin thing freakout, what we'll call them (now and later), where we will put them, when and how we'll tell Patrick (soon! soonish. actually, that is the subject of my first REDBOOK mom post that I have not yet written but I should get up tomorrow or Wednesday - I'll let you know)... I'm not quite there yet. And, since I am just squeaking into the second trimester at 13w2d, I have time. Steve has reacted by telling everyone he knows and getting out the book of weird Celtic names to see if he still favors Aourgwenn for a girl. He is... he is so relieved and excited and giddy. He has been pro-twin since forever so he is also a little smug.

Oh and when I called my brother at the office to say that the CVS results were good, he (my brother) started crying.

Ah. The genders. Sorry, the sexes (words have gender; people have sex, ho ho ho). We really don't want to know until they are delivered. We did not find out with Patrick and we do not want to find out with these two. What can I say? We like to draw out our suspense. Prolong the surprise. Irritate Steve's stepmother. I honestly have no preference one way or another. My mother has already decided it is a boy and a girl and is knitting accordingly. I always paint everything a neutral color anyway. I have saved every article of clothing Patrick ever wore in purple plastic shrines/bins in the basement so, boys or girls, they are wearing a lot of hand-me-downs regardless. Oh. Actually, I just realized that after lovingly saving every sock for Patrick's presidential museum or Future Baby we have gone ahead and conceived at the apex of the Patrick equinox. So even if we have boys it is unlikely that they will appreciate the tiny blue sunsuits in which newborn Patrick first greeted summer's warming rays. I mean, unless we put all the summer clothes on simultaneously and then throw a parka on top. And a bear skin. You might not know this but Minnesota? In January? Gets cold.

Someone once asked (actually many people over the years have asked this) when I get to relax and just enjoy being pregnant. The answer is now, apparently. Good genetic results were all I needed. We still have the two vessel cord on B and the 7 D&Cs = vastly increased risk for an incompetent cervix and the 50% of twin pregnancies deliver early and my trips to L&D with managed preterm labor with Patrick... but all I can do about that is just take care of myself and be vigilant and hope everything goes well. Without the translocation looming over me I can be happy, truly deliriously happy, to just be pregnant with a reasonable expectation of a good outcome.

And I am.                

PS I have always welcomed advice on pretty much every topic and this is most definitely no exception. So if you want to suggest anything that worked for you with... anything, by all means feel free. No apologies necessary. I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to hear from you, too.

Comments

[Queenie]

And you deserve to just be happy, for once. You really do.

[Kara]

Wow, Julia. Beautiful, beautiful post. I've been reading for a couple of years but never commented, and I just wanted to say that I too am "deliriously happy" for you, that you finally get to feel that way. Best wishes, in the most sincere sense of the words.

Kara

[Melissa]

I'm sure you are going to get tons of these 'I did this' comments, but I'm offering mine in the spirit of knowing I devoured any info I could get as to what others did while they were pregnant with twins...I drank TONS of water - like 100 to 120 oz a day. I ate and ate and ate - and I lost weight the first trimester and didn't really start packing it on until after about 18 weeks or so - between 18 weeks and 24 weeks, I gained alot! I really think that gaining the weight early helped us have two really healthy, sizable ones (6lb5oz and 6lb3oz), even though they were 4 weeks early. Soooo, I'm quite verbose this evening but there you have it. Good luck and keep eating ;-).

[Amber]

Being happy. it sounds wonderful. YOU sound wonderful. what a fight girl. so glad you stayed in it to win it.

[julia]

Julia! I haven't visited for a while, and here I am and ... there you are, and ... *weep* ... congratulations!!

[Sarah]

I have a Dec 28th boy...yes, it is less than ideal..I dreaded the DATE although I was ecstatic that I was finally able to have a DATE...2 1/2 years later, I still get the jokes, the pitying looks...

So having a Christmas baby? Not as horrible as everyone makes it out to be, makes for a very hectic December and an exhausted January. We've either done his birthday parties 2 weeks before or 2 weeks after, he still racks up a crap load of presents. I'm contemplating celebrating half-birthday in June, just so he can have a non-Christmasy good time...but it's really not that bad. We made it VERY clear to everyone involved that there would be no "combo" parties/celebrations. We make a big hooplah over his birthday and try to keep the 2 mega-gift-giving events as seperately as possible.

I am soooooooooooooooo ecstatic for you and can NOT wait to see these two bubs. I've told everyone I know about your and your story, even though you don't know me from Jane.

Many, many, many congratulations and may the nausea soon come to an end so you can REALLY enjoy eating...at least until the heartburn kicks in. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

[Carrie]

My birthday is January 2, my father's January 1, and his father's on Christmas Day. My family gets bored in early spring, apparently. Anyway, make sure the kids get seperate birthday presents and parties (no combo Christmas/birthday presents) and consider half-birthday summer parties while they're young, and it won't be a big deal.

Peanut butter/banana/milk smoothies really help pack on the pounds. Or blend peanut butter into chocolate milk. There was a time, long ago, when I needed help keeping on weight, though I have made up for it and then some since. Also, you're pregnant! Eat ice cream!

Glad you are able to relax a bit now. Congratulations.

[Gina]

Julia, I am so happy for you! I do not have any twin-pregnancy advice for you, but my husband was born on Dec. 30th and so I've heard all about the "Christmas" birthdays. He has always told me that he got cheated out of birthday gifts (he got combo gifts) and he resented the hell out of that. I like what Sarah said about just keeping it seperate and not allowing any combo-parties/gifts. After everything you've been through, I'm sure the least of your worries is the babies being born too close to Christmas. :) Even though I have a one year old daughter, and a couple of other kids and I am not wanting to have any more children, I have to admit I am a tad jealous of you having such a wonderful thing to look forward to. I really am so happy for you!!!

[Heather]

Long time lurker coming out for two reasons. One to congratulate you! And two, to let you know that my son had a two-vessel cord and he came out on time (39w4d) and completely perfect. :)

I wish you a happy, healthy, stress-free pregnancy.

[Kate]

I'm so glad your nausea has relented somewhat! While I never was pregnant with twins, I did find that the one thing that seemed to help with my morning (all-day) sickness was citrus fruit, specifically grapefruit. I swear I ate 3 of them a day. And if I couldn't get them, I squeezed lemons in water and drank that. I don't know if the pregnancy made me hyperalkaline or something, but the acid made me feel much, much better. Now whenever I see grapefruit I feel this fond nostalgia for it, like "oh, hello old friend."

[Cam]

My brother's birthday is the 23rd, and Mom made sure he was never shortchanged. Birthday gifts were always wrapped in birthday paper, and it was requested that he always have at least a special birthday card from family. Family has always been v. understanding and accommodating.
It really started to pay off for him when he reached adolescence. That was when he got "combined" gifts too expensive for just one holiday- game systems, guitars, all kinds of electronics. Every boy's dream.
As for parties, attendance was low if scheduled too close to holidays, so they were usually celebrated before school let out. There was the one year we suggested a summer party instead, but he just couldn't comprehend that he wouldn't ALSO get one in December! He has always been a bit of a stickler about the family celebrating (cake and presents) on the ACTUAL DAY rather than whenever the party was.
Looking forward to the adorable first Christmas photos of the twins snuggled up in stockings next to Patrick in a Santa hat!

[Michelle in NYC]

Aaahhh... Well, first of all, congratulations again! I am thrilled for you. But completely empathize with the expected Christmas arrival of the babies.

My due date with my daughter (now 4 years old) was January 1st. I spent the entire preceding Christmas Day on the couch, in my pajamas, willing myself not to go into labor. Around 11:00 P.M. that night I went to bed thrilled that I would not be having a Christmas baby after all... only to wake up 2 hours later in labor.

So, December 26th it was. A Boxing Day baby. And with a British husband and annual commitment to spend Christmas in England, she really is a Boxing Day baby.

The only advice I have to offer after 4 years of day-after-Christmas birthday parties: make the best of it. At 12:01 A.M. every December 26th, we turn off Christmas and turn on Birthday. We whoop it up from start to finish, discourage "double-duty" gifts, and make it the best Boxing Day birthday a girl could ever want.

Then she has to wait 364 days for the whole gift-giving extravaganza to start all over again.

[Geohde]

I have no helpful advice since my only pregnancy to date ended at the end of the first trimester.

But I did want to stop by and again offer my heartfelt congratulations that you are getting to enjoy a wonderful, NORMAL pregnancy.

I hope it all goes incredibly smoothly.

[MelissaC]

I'm a December 10th baby, and my son's birthday is January 1st, so I just have to chime in on the birthday/Christmas discussion. I'm in total agreement about the "no combo gifts" rule. Another pet peeve when I was a kid was to get a birthday gift wrapped in Christmas paper. Just...no. Don't. My son (who is 6 now) seems to think it's a huge bonus. So many gifts in such a short time span. Woo!!!
Oh, and congratulations again. As a long-time lurker and very infrequent poster, I just want to say I am absolutely THRILLED for you!

[SarcastiCarrie]

I have a question for others....those who have had premature infants/pre-term labor or were pregnant with twins. Is there any reason (say, a bad side effect or unknown long-term effects) not to take the steroids for lung maturation when you are at high risk of delivering prematurely? If there is no bad effect, it would seem that twin pregnancies (or higher order multiples) would have this most of the time, but that doesn't appear to be the case.

And congratulations on getting good genetic results. I was out-of-the-loop with Taste of Chicago salmonella poisoning and didn't get to comment earlier. For salmonella vomiting, I found a nice warm shower to be comforting...probably not a help for morning sickness.

[amy]

I'm still nearly dizzy with happiness for you all.
My mom's birthday is the 26th, and her biggest complaint has always been the combo gifts or parties. She did not have a birthday cake of her own (one that was not also a Christmas dessert) until she was in college, a point she drives home every. fricking. year. So please. For your children's children's sakes - make them non-Christmas birthday cake.

[Kim]

I have a friend whose husband's birthday is like the 23rd or something (22nd, 23rd). Anyway, she bakes him his own separate birthday cake every year while she does her Christmas baking. He gets presents wrapped in birthday paper, not Christmas paper, etc. etc. My cousins also both married people born on Christmas day, and it was the same thing - no combo presents, wrap in birthday paper, be sure to have a cake.

Congrats again - I am so, so very happy for you. Do we get to see pictures of the fetbabies? (And I still love righty/lefty as a nickname.)

[Jenn]

Personally, I think Dr. Luke is full of it. Advocating weight gain by eating hamburgers and milkshakes just doesn't make sense to me. Empty calories are empty calories and aren't helping the babies any. She makes it seem like if you don't gain the appropriate amount of weight you are DOOMED. BTW she is not a medical doctor. And since one is obviously statistically significant , I gained 18 pounds with my twins, was induced at 37 weeks and they weighed 6 and 7 pounds. Take that Dr. Luke!

Also, my sister's birthday is three days after Christmas and she loves it.

[Midsummer Night]

Congratulations on the twins! No great advice here, but I will ask my sister-in-law when I get a chance. But I just had to tell you again I am so excited for you! I am expecting a little one December 10th. If I manage to get to December I don't think I will care one iota if the little one wants to hang out till the day of Christmas. My mothers B-day is the 12-24, and while I know she hated it I think keeping things separate would make all the difference.

[Rose]

I am a Christmas baby and it didn't suck much. True, birthday parties with friends were non-existent in December, but my wonderful mother always made sure to hose a 1/2 birthday party for me in June. She still sends me cards and brings me gifts on my half birthday. It has always made me feel very special. I got 2 birthdays while the rest of you suckers had to make due with 1.

Best wishes!
Rose

[Abby]

I have no advice except you must name them Star and Noel, or Merry and Holly.

I am SO TOTALLY KIDDING. In fact, you maybe can promise us that you WON'T do that? Right? Maybe?

My college roommate's b-day is New Year's Eve. She's always liked it. If it was me, I'd play it up as special - it IS a special time of the year to be born, afterall!

Congrats and good luck. After reading you for so long I don't at all feel weird to be happy for a complete stranger!

[Emily]

I'm still overcome with happiness for you. I'm due about four days ahead of you and have felt an intense kinship and investment in your 13s from the get-go; hearing good news about them makes me as happy as hearing good news about our own fetus, which looks rather like a pigeon. Sisters in arms, we are.

I have a good friend with a 12/24 birthday and here is what they always did: she had something called a "new school birthday," which was a birthday celebration on some other day during the year, and every year it took place on a different day, and every year it was...a surprise! We still do this for her and it is still awesome. She's Jewish, so Christmas didn't really rain on her parade as it might have if she were competing for attention with JC, but all the same, her friends were never available to celebrate with her on the actual day. So the new school birthday was just a stroke of mad brilliance.

I also have twin friends from childhood whose birthday is 12/23 and they always had rockin' birthday parties on the weekend before school let out for vacation and I still remember them as being a blast. Bowling, scavenger hunts, etc. NEVER Christmas-themed but always festive nonetheless.

Feliz navidad!

[nate]

You sound so happy. And normal. And happily normal. It's hard to know what advice you could possibly need right now!

But I love to give baby advice (not that I really remember much at this point), and you just gave me an opening, so here goes.

C was born in March--which in WI, is not so warm--and for the first month we had a few hand-me-down fleece bunting bags/sleep sacks and we just rotated them. So easy--their little legs like to stay curled up, and sleepers w/ separate legs are a big pain. You just drop them in, put the arms through, zip them up, e voila! Baby in a bag!

Also, if you end up w/ heartburn, I heard (after the fact) that papaya enzyme is supposed to be good for it. Oh, and if you end up nursing (or I guess the mother breastfeeds, babies nurse) the Mother's Milk tea is a bit odd at first--but I found that when I stopped drinking it I missed it.

So there you go.
Steve sounds like T--when I was pregnant, he was coming up w/ names like Amenhotep, or Melanippus. Not entirely in jest, either. Thank goodness we had a girl and I could insiste on a family name...

[chris]

Just plan for everything. I didn't go on bedrest and went to term, but I had everything done for Christmas by November and all the baby stuff done shortly thereafter. I also went with a high risk OB (which I assume you would do anyway, just in case?) even though I didn't need it. I didn't want to be surprised. Of course, in the end you can't avoid some surprises (like the fact that my husband absolutely couldn't manage the house when I was in the hospital), but at least I knew I was covered for most of them. Oh, and hire help. Lots of it. Oh, and get ready to be a travelling freak show when you go out with your twins--people ask the dumbest questions and, something I rarely got with my first, seem to want to touch them. It's freaky.

Oh, congrats, too.

[Jo in Utah]

Awww! Happy giddy folks. Nice to hear after all you guys have been through. Giddy with you.

I can't offer much in the way of advice on having Christmas babies, but I do have twins and I made it through a LONG, uncomfortable pregnancy relatively unscathed. Well, there is the twin skin..... ugh...

My main advice is to drink lots of water and as much milk as you can. It is possible to drink too much milk, though, so keep it in check. But I always say when I'm asked for my secret to growing such big babies, that I drank two big glasses of chocolate milk every day.

Stay positive, read the Dr. Luke books and enjoy this time. Life as you know it will change in ways you can't even imagine! It's ALL good, though.

Congrats!
Anne

[Jaime]

I had premature twins. Fortunately, I had about 2 weeks (I went into labor at 27 weeks and stayed nearly 4 cm dilated) in the high risk maternity wing to get the steroid shots and incubate some more. I would definitely say they are worth it. The girls were 31 weeks at delivery and are perfectly healthy now!

Congrats again,Julia!

[Alison]

Hi Julia!

I am due January 20, so I have really been enjoying sharing in all of this with you. I lost my last pregnancy at 18 weeks in March, so this one still seems so surreal to me.

Also, I was born Dec. 30 and I LOVED my birthday. As many people have already said, keeping the celebrations separate is key. I always viewed it as a blessing having a another party to look forward to after the Christmas let-down. Very self-absorbed was I... Anyway, best of luck and joy with everything!!

-Alison

[nate]

Oh, and by the way--what specifically helped w/ nausea (after the first trimester) was protein and fat. Specifically ice cream. And I worked 2 blocks from the campus dairy store, so took in a LOT of chocolate-peanut butter ice cream. Man, I miss that...

[jonniker]

My birthday is Dec. 27, and honestly, it's not that bad. Yes, yes, fine, it kind of blows that I never got to bring cupcakes into school, and I could never have real parties, but in a weird way, it's more celebratory, because the whole week is delightful and special and hooray!

The thing is that you just have to make sure to make the occasion special, which of course you will. Plus, they'll have each other. And never, ever wrap their birthday presents in Christmas paper. Never!

[Alex]

Long time lurker, first time commenter...

Congratulations!! So, so happy for you. Let the good times roll!

I'm a 12/21 birthday girl, and I've always loved it. Christmas has always been my favorite time of year, and having my birthday at the same time made it even more of a celebration (of course, the more birthdays that go by, the more that part of it sucks...). My parents always made sure that I had my own party, separate gifts, etc. (even now that I'm close to 40 - it's funny).

Anyway, just my .02. Much love and blessings to you, Steve, and Patrick!

[Kirsten]

My birthday is December 22nd, and I used to get one corner of under-the-tree just for my birthday presents! Mostly, I'd agree with what everybody said about keeping it separate.

One note: as an adult, my birthday is awesome. Everyone is in a holiday mood and there are parties left and right. (I feel certain that everyone is celebrating on my behalf.... right?) I have only occasionally had school or work on my birthday. In the years that I've lived far away from my parents, I often get to be home in time for a big family birthday (my sister was born in October, and her birthday is relatively ignored).

Ultimately, when people say things like "oh, that birthday must suck", the only answer I have is that it's the only birthday I've got, so I don't have any comparison, but it's really really not as bad as people think.

[Anne Glamore]

My oldest son was 2 when my twins were born. I love surprises also, and there are mighty few in life (okay, of the good kind) so we didn't find out what the twins were either. I covered a chair in pink FOR ME and we thought up a bunch of names and then BAM: two more peckers.

Now that everyone's 9 and 11 things are REALLY getting interesting, pre-puberty wise.

Best of luck to you.

A great hint for us, because people always ooh and aah over twins, and we didn't want the oldest to feel left out-- my doc suggested we let HIM introduce them to people: These are my brothers-- and that made him feel included and important.

[Ashley]

So happy to hear that you're so happy!

I'm working on my Master's in Physician Assistant sciences (almost done!) and we learned, especially with multiples, diet is SO UNBELIEVABLY IMPORTANT! Protein especially. My only advice would be to research twin pregnancy diets and concentrate on getting enough protein every day. A good diet will help prevent preterm labor and built healthy babies. Sorry, I don't know of any books/sites specifically.

Protein! Protein! Protein!

[Lauren]

I read your first paragraph and haven't read the rest, but wanted to give my two cents about Christmas birthdays. Mine is the 18th...exactly a week before Christmas. I LOVE it. My mom always did a fabulous job of keeping the events separate. Birthday wrapping paper is not Christmas-y and I've never had a "combined" party. One cool thing she has done is to buy me a Christmas ornament every year for my birthday that corresponds to an event that happened during the year. Now that I'm 23, I have a lovely little collection that is quite special.

I think the issue with Christmas birthdays is effort. If you make the distinction, the child(ren) will know that they are special despite the holiday insanity. It's a festive time of year to have a birthday and that can be used to add to instead of detract from the day. If you want it to be special, it will be.

And...Congratulations!!! My thoughts are with all of you.
L

[julia]

My birthday is in the middle of freakin' NOVEMBER and I STILL get combination gifts.

Maybe you could do half-birthday parties for them, during the summer. Call them Unbirthdays. Or maybe that's too geeky...it's totally something I'd do. But I'm a geek.

I have no advice or assvice on twin pregnancies, never having had twins. I just wanted to comment on how how honest-to-pete happy you sound. I don't comment much because I've only had one miscarriage and have not had fertility problems and I don't want to step on any toes, even inadvertently, but I have been reading you for a long time and I had to de-lurk to say how thrilled I am for you and Steve and Patrick. (Wow. Run on sentence, anyone?) It's so wonderful - words can't begin to say.

[Lucy]

They won't "let" you go to 40 weeks? That's bullshit.

[throwingutah]

I have a feeling that your pregnancies have been so intervention-intensive that the idea of letting the pregnancy play itself out seems weird. So.
Oh, and about the birthdays. I'm a couple days off from your due date, and my son's a month earlier. It's definitely better to have a birthday before Christmas than once the credit card bills start coming in. He's coming up on four, and he loves the idea of December, because as far as he's concerned, it's *all* about him. When he gets older, we may do the mid-year celebration so the poor child can have a pool party.

[Beth]

Well, my son was born on Christmas Day, but he's not quite 2 yet, so I can't really tell you how that's working out for us.

I did post a question about people's opinions of their close-to-Christmas birthdays on Ask Metafilter, and people were fairly non-bitter about it.

After his birth, it was just one more thing causing me crippling anxiety. ("oh my god, I ruined his life! by giving birth to him on Christmas!!") I had to let it go, and quickly.

Congratulations, and I'm just one more person feeling so happy for you.

[PeggyP]

I am so happy for you and Steve and Patrick.

My birthday is 12/12. The rule growing up was no decorating for Christmas until after my birthday. And no combo presents.

My twins were due Dec 20 but were born Oct 14 so they missed the December birthday .

They spent 44 days in the NICU but now are healthy guys of almost 27.

[Amanda]

Looking for calories?
Try these:

Avocados
Nuts
Chocolate
Eggs
Bananas
Yogurt
Pasta
Fruit juices

Let the eating begin!

[wavybrains]

I come from a family of Christmas babies. My two brothers and I all have birthdays between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Two uncles have birthdays around Thanksgiving. An Aunt was born ON Christmas, and a cousin has a birthday 2 days later, and another aunt has one 3 days after. Um yeah. Spooky fertility waters in my family aside, I can say that holiday birthdays all come down to how the parent treats it. My Aunt loved having a Christmas birthday (and still does) b/c her family had a routine: Christmas eve for church and extended family, Christmas day for immediate family, and then Christmas night was her birthday--she got to pick the dinner and got a special non-Christmas gift as her parents recounted the story of her dramatic Christmas arrival. When she was little, her parents would make sure that she had a chance later to celebrate with friends. My cousin hates her birthday (even though it's the day after) b/c her parents never made an attempt to make it special, she always got dual presents, and never got to celebrate with friends. My other aunt with the birthday on the 28th HATES her birthday with a passion b/c her parents gave her a holiday-themed name, and every present they give her always has a holiday theme and she got holiday themed parties. Even with 3 birthdays in 2 weeks, my mom made sure that each of us got our special day, our own cake and celebration, rather than have one joint birthday party for all 3 of us. Accordingly, I don't hate my December birthday. Now that I'm an adult, my husband often celebrates my half birthday in the summer b/c December is usually so much about spending $$ on other people. I know that some parents have also used the half-birthday celebration too. The key is that you make it special and unique for your child(ren). I'm relieved to be having a Sept. baby, but just b/c it separates it from the whole slew of family birthdays.

This is my first pregnancy, but I was five when my brother was born, and my mother waited until she was about 5 months along to really "tell" me. I think I kinda knew, but she told me and I got to go to an appointment with her to hear the heartbeat which was cool. At five, even 4 months can seem like forever. I remember feeling like she'd been pregnant forever. IMHO, there would be nothing wrong with waiting to tell Patrick until much later along if that was what you wanted to do.

Also, we're not finding out the sex. We're taking a huge amount of flak for wanting to be surprised, so stand firm! surprise is good! You'll be so glad that you waited!

[Whitney]

ginger snaps.... if you can tolerate them do wonderful things for nausea. In the same way as ginger ale, but better- and with more calories. You sound so wonderful- it's like that pregnancy glow just warms up my computer screen.

[Evy]

I have had nineteen years of Dec 28th birthdays, but added to the chaos of another family member with a 23rd birthday and my father's on the 27th, it can get easily overwhelmed.

When I was a kid, my mom put together the best Half-Birthday summer parties that really only doubled the happiness. That way, I had a party, cake, presents, etc with my friends in June, but come December 28th, I had the family's presents to unwrap and the typical "you choose dinner and dessert" birthday privilege.

I think what it comes down to is how dedicated you are to making the birthday special and distinct. There will always be people who give combined gifts (which, later in life, sometimes pays off, if you believe one fantastic present is better than two okay ones) and there will always be people treating it like a Big Giant Deal, but you're the one who's going to set the standard for birthdays.

Congratulations. Add me to the list of people wishing you and your family all the best.

[Susan]

Sigh. I'm going to cry through every post of this pregnancy. I read "I have a due date" and teared up ...

going to try to read the rest of it now.

[BrooklynGirl]

Hooray, hooray, hooray.

[Liz]

My first was born on December 16th 2003 (in Minneapolis!) and long awaited #2 is due December 26th! (Sorry. I know 3 1/2 years is nothing for most everyone, but the trouble and the miscarriages were tough for me) Poor #1 has to share a birthday with Jesus and a sibling now.

But, I gotta say, even though he's only 3 1/2, he's dealt with the whole Christmas birthday thing really well. The only real problem is January. The kid gets so used to Presents! All! The! Time! that January can be a bit of a let down.

I couldn't be more thrilled for you. My only advice is to be prepared for a December birth in Minnesota. They won't let you leave the house with these two until March at the earliest. Seriously. And you're gonna have to sneak some really nasty, nasty Vitamin D drops into pumped milk or formula so they don't get Rickets. I'm not making that up. Our guy handled it like a champ and I'm sure yours will as well.

Looking forward to counting down the days with you.

[kari]

Drink Ensure for weight gain. The drink ain't gonna help your nausea, but it helped me gain weight when I was pregnant, even when Big Macs didn't. I suggest chocolate flavor, so cold it's almost frozen.

[Beth]

That was one thing I loved about being pregnant with twins--I always got a quick ultrasound to verify the two heartbeats rather than the Doppler thing on my tummy. I thought that was so cool!

I lost weight in the first trimester because of all the nausea and vomiting. My doctor finally just told me to eat whatever sounded good, even if it was a Snickers bar or whatever. I will agree with the poster who mentioned protein; get a lot of it! I craved cheese throughout my pregnancy, so that was one way I got some extra protein.

Again, I am so happy for you! You deserve this!

[Wendy Noel]

I am one of those Christmas babies. Dec. 26th. It's not that bad. I felt like a "present" as a kid. It's a very magical time of the year - and I think your children will fit nicely into that category. It seems right that they will be born around Christmas. I can't wait.