One Hand

I had a leg cramp at five o'clock this morning that was so horrible I was actually able to see the fourth dimension. Google tells me that the proper thing to do is reach down and pull your toes up, which is all good and well but I can't reach my toes under the best of circumstances. From a sound sleep, lying on my back, with 2.5 lbs of babies in the way it is absolutely impossible. And no, I do not actually sleep on my back I sleep on my side but I wound up on my back when I was flattened by the pain. As a side note, I cannot help but notice that whenever I wake up in the wee hours the babies are moving around like crazy. Well 13a, mainly. Who knows what b does. It appears that they sleep most of the day and are up all night. Great. Little teenagers.

I cannot quite place my concern about Patrick's school, to return to what I was saying in passing on Friday. It is a nice school. They stress community and personal responsibility and other positive things. Patrick seems to be happy enough. I know that they spent the first few weeks getting kids adjusted to the space and the routine and that they are only starting to do assessments this week. I know that he has a couple of friends that he really likes. His only consistent complaint is that he says he is there for too long. Since right now his day lasts from 9:15 until 12:20 but he will be going until 3:45 (THREE! FORTY! FIVE! is it me, or is that a REALLY long day?) when he transitions to full day, I am not sure what to do about that. Is it long because he is bored or because he would rather be home with me or is it just something to complain about? I have pointed out that when he goes full day he will start taking Spanish in the afternoons (in theory this should be a big draw), but he countered by saying he would rather take French. I explained that they only teach Spanish and he said, "What about German?" I think he is just being difficult because honestly - GERMAN? Since when is he interested in German.

Steve got the wall up and we now have two new rooms for the babies or guests or baby guests. Well, sort of. The drywall is up on one side. It is still pending in the other because... every time I think about this I giggle. Steve committed a small gaffe as he pulled the electricity for the new rooms and now when you flick the switch in room A nothing happens in there. Because you are turning the lights on and off in room B. The switch goes to the wrong room. See how wicked I am? I am cracking up just writing about it. Whoops! So Steve needs to do whatever it is that needs to be done so that the lights are not inexplicably flickering in one bedroom, and then he will put the drywall up and then there is talk of doors and wood trim. Patrick would like to paint the rooms red and purple, which I approve of in theory but doubt I will actually go for in practice. I am actually thinking a nice cream color in both or, should we all get a little high on the paint store fumes, a very light mushroom. Then I need to buy another crib and two more dressers and... I don't remember. Some other stuff. I made a list but I cannot find it. Car seat! That was on it. 

New REDBOOK post up about my latest OB appointment and ultrasound, should you care to read it.

I am actually LIMPING, my leg is still so sore from that Charley Horse. Steve and Patrick seem to be momentarily occupied so I think I will go soak it in the bathtub. And if I happen to lock the door and bring my book with me, well, all the better. 

Comments

[Dara]

Hmmm...speaking of schools, my just turned four year old daughter is enrolled full-time in our local Montessori school. She is in a pre-school class. Last week when we dropped her off, her teacher was not in. We asked and were told, "Mrs. So&So will be out for a few days". When we got home, my husband and I were quietly enjoying the paper, when we noticed an article about a recent "drug-bust". Turns out my daughter's teacher and her husband were busted growing marijuana on their farm. I thought she was a great teacher. She played the guitar and made up songs...my daughter said she liked her....the school sent home a notice saying she was on permanent leave and that they were hiring a new Montessori teacher ASAP. Keep in mind, Mrs.So&So was in her late 50's and a graduate of Vassar....I am still kinda in shock over the whole thing. And, a tad pissed. Not that I judge her...but the paper did state that the plants could be seen from the road...dude, couldn't they have hid the plants better?

Oh, she gets out at 2:30 and my eldest, in kindergarten, gets out at 2:35. 3:45 IS a very long day.

Leg cramps----milk,milk,milk. Works wonders for me. I still get them, but not as severe.

[Sarah V.]

Good lord! Am I really the first commentator on this post, or is it just that there's something wrong with comments and nobody's comment is showing up at all?

Anyway, what I was going to do here was the asshat thing of doling out unsolicited advice, so feel free to delete this, or whatever. Basically: Pelvic rocks. You get down on all fours and alternate between arching your back up and tucking your bottom in as far as possible, and arching your back down and sticking your bottom up as far as possible. Think of wagging an imaginary tail up and down rather than side-to-side. The point is to shift the babies just enough that the blood that's stuck in your leg veins has a bit of a gap to squeeze past. The book I read advised doing forty of these at various intervals which I forget during the day, then eighty at night, with a break halfway through to get some rest (or, if you're me, save yourself the trouble of having to keep track of sequential numbers as high as 80 - I find it a lot easier only to have to count to 40 at a time, but that's probably just me).

I did this through my first pregnancy (singleton) and had very little in the way of leg oedema, which may of course be a total coincidence, but... on those days when I did notice my feet swelling a bit, there was a noticeable improvement in my foot comfort level when I got up from doing my pelvic rocks. And so, yes, I do swear by them. The reason I bring the subject up now is because I'm currently seven months along in my second pregnancy (singleton) and also had a couple of leg cramps the other night (not in the same league of severity as yours, but nonetheless uncomfortable) and it was one of the few nights on which I hadn't done my usual eighty pelvic rocks the previous evening. Which, of course, may be a coincidence as well. But then again it may not be. So I offer this as a possible way of preventing further leg cramps, not to mention leg oedema.

[Melissa]

More unsolicited advice...not trying to freak you out. I had a similar leg cramp experience around week 25 of pregnancy. My leg still hurt two days later when I happened to have my ob visit. My doc noticed I was limping and asked why. I told him about the leg cramp and was very quickly sent to the vascular doctor for an ultrasound of my calf and inner thigh to rule out a clot. Are you a clotty person? If so (or even if not) you may want to mention it to the ob. I had no clot, just a strange ultrasound. Maybe the tech will move north and let you see the babes again!

[Pam L]

Leg cramps-ouch! I could never get rid of one while in bed no matter which way I tried to stretch the leg it made it worse. I always had to get up and walk on it. Potassium, I am told, is good for this-so eat bananas or something. I haven't had one in years, leg cramps that is, I eat bananas often.

All day Kinder IS long considering they are usually coming from pre-school/pre-kinder which is usually half days at best and not 5 days in a row, typically. Heck. it's a long day for anyyone considering you have to be "on" the whole time, ya know? Have to be good, have to be paying attention, have to be doing your best. No alone time, quiet time , melt down time etc. I remember being in grade school and sometimes staring at the clock wondering why it was only 3:17 when it seemed like hours ago I checked the clock and it was 3:15. My 14yr old now has to get up at 5:20AM each day so he can leave for the bus by 6:15AM. You know what THAT means, I have to be up at 5:15AM so I can get HIM up, because he can sleep through the horrible beeping of an alarm clock not set to the radio when it goes off. He can sleep through it forever, while it wakes up the rest of the house, so I get him up. Luckily, this means we are BOTH tired enough by 10PM to go to sleep, but I'm still not happy about it. 5:15AM is just cruel. Atleast I got a 7 year break from this since his brother was in high school and he was worse to wake up, much much worse. See all the fun you have to look forward to with school?

If I had millions to give away I would give it to the district's transportation dept. so they could have enough buses and drivers to run buses for the elementary, middle AND high school all at the same time so no one had to walk out the door in the utter dark and cold to catch a bus to school.

[Geohde]

I like the light switch debacle.

Sounds like something I would do :)

Hi,

I have occasional night time leg cramps, but I just couldn't correlate it with anything at all that might be a cause.
I would appreciate your posting anything that you learn about and find is effective in preventing them. (And I am not pregnant--but will try the milk, bananas, and pelvic rocks.) It happens only rarely, but oh! is it miserable!
Keep us posted.

Thanks!

[marion]

Never been pregnant, but have had middle-of-the-night charley horses for years.

1) There is a bundle of nerves in the inside of your mouth around the middle of your bottom lip but extending downward. This bundle connects to your legs (don't ask me how). When you wake up in the middle of the night with a charley horse, press down HARD on this bundle - as in, grab your lower lip in a two-finger pincher grip on both sides in the middle. This will help. Pressing HARD into the knot in your leg with the other hand also helps, but that might be too awkward at this point.

2) Stretch every night before you go to bed - nothing fancy, just do the "one leg bent, the other stretched straight out behind you" stretch.

Sorry you're getting the cramps. They suck.

[Jen]

On the kindergarten theme, I admit that I'd never thought of your problem with length. I was just jealous of the start at half-day and then lengthen scheme, since my kid's is 9-3:30 right from the start. He too says it's "too long" although, again without a lot of clarity on exactly why that is. For him, it may be playing the perfectly behaved child is a chore for that many hours. He doesn't attempt it for that long at home.

But at least now, I know that it could be just as bad if it was shorter. Not a very helpful comment, is this? Sorry about that.
I am going in tomorrow for an hour or two to help out -- I did this with the older kids, being the good volunteer mommy once a week, and you definitely do get a good view of what's going on. You'll have a harder time with this...I can't imagine if you manage to find 2 hours of time for yourself after the twins appear, that visiting a school and hearing all the little kid voices will be high on your list!

[akeeyu]

I read somewhere that with fetbryos, their most active period is when they're sleeping. Therefore, they may not be party animals, just sleepwalkers.

[Elizabeth]

I got charley horses when I was pregnant. I would wake up crying, and my husband would have to remind me that I needed to stand up. I think being tired and in pain I just couldn't remember what to do on my own. Stretches in bed didn't help. Eating bananas and milk didn't help. Standing up did. The ghost of the cramp would be there for the following day, though.

[Lee]

My .02 about leg cramps.

With caution, my OB recommended a magnesium supplement to help with the charley horses. She mentioned the possibility of intestinal issues, but I thought, "Some loose stools sound nice at this point as does no leg cramps!"

She was right: magnesium helped and for a few nights I was in absolute heaven.

The loose stools weren't quite loose. In the spirit of TMI, I'll say it was like a tablespoon of looseness followed by constipation. Ten times a day.

So, WITH CAUTION, I'd recommend magnesium.

[winecat]

Ouch, it hurts just reading about it. As for Patrick and his languages I heart Patrick.

[winecat]

And I forget it's great to here that the 13's are doing well. I was getting a bit worried.

Party On 13's

[Jess]

Sometimes I wake up with a leg cramp so awful that I think I'm going to die, and my instinct is to leap out of bed and put weight on that leg immediately. Walking on it seems to be the only thing that helps. One time it was so bad that when I tried to stand on the cramped leg, I actually fell over because my leg couldn't stand the pressure. The toe-grabbing trick will definitely be on my list of things to try next time that happens.

On another note, I also scorned German when presented with options about languages to learn, because really? German? Who needs that? And now ten years later I'm engaged to a German man and desperately trying to become fluent before we have kids so that we can raise them bilingual without them being able to say things in front of me that I don't understand. So, you never know.

[malin]

So sorry I am about to do this but, If you can push on your leg were the cramp was and it still hurts now to the touch, you should take that seriously. Oh yeah and I love your blog, I read all the time.

[Lisa O]

Want some unsolicited decorating advice? For gender unknown nurseries, yellow is nice - with red & white gingham sheets, curtains, whatnot.

Leg cramps? Potassium? Bananas?

[All Adither]

How about zebra stripes in one room and leopard print in the other?

[Lara]

I had horrible leg cramps - where the muscle would turn into a huge knot - while pregnant with my twins UNTIL my OB explained I probably had a calcium deficiency. When I upped my dosage of calcium, the cramps went away and did not return.

[maggie]

Get out of bed (if you can) and stand on the leg and lean forward, so that you're flexing your ankle.

Ben Moore Linen White is a nice yellowish beige-ish white.

[throwingutah]

Cramps were my worst pregnancy symptom. By all means, stand up for the midnight charley horses, because trying to reach your toes when you really can't just extends the muscle even more. Get up and bend your knees to stretch out the calf. You can take care of your hourly trip to the potty while you're out of bed.
I recommend a nightly glass of orange juice. It has potassium galore, plus the benefit of liquidity. It doesn't matter if you drink a bunch of fluids at bedtime, since your bladder fills hourly, plus it helps with the B-H contractions.

[Amie]

Make sure when you're stretching (the kind of stretch you do because it feels good, not the kind before you start working out) that you pull your toes up towards your head....don't point them downward (as if you were a ballet dancer) because that will bring on cramps if not cause them all together. I found when ever I got a cramp, I could just pull my toes up towards my head, I didn't even need to grab them with my hands, just do it with my feet, that the cramp usually subsided quite quickly. Sorry you have them though, they sure do suck!

Glad to hear the 13's are well and Patrick, well, I just LOVE reading about him...he's so intriguing for a 5 year old!

[Catherine]

Red & purple? I think you should totally do it. Not the entire room, mind you. Maybe an accent wall. Or a border. Or some wainscoting. I'm one for brave colors though. Son's room is orange and purple. Granted he was three when we did it. And I mean, ORANGE.

Oooh! Stripes. Not both colors alternating. Maybe some narrow purple strips over beige. OR! Red geometric shapes. I'm really good at living vicariously through other people's painting fun. If you scan my blog you'll see I have some great, unfulfilled, ideas.

[jaybee]

my guys went to kindergarten from 8:15 - 2:45. They had a nap/quiet time after lunch where the teacher darkened the room and read stories to them as they lay on beach towels. My kids never complained about the length of the day but were pretty wiped out by dinner time. Patrick should be able to handle the length -- maybe once they get into the regular curriculum instead of assessments and introductions, he'll be more interested. And Sailcloth is a great Benjamin Moore color!

[JuliaKB]

Light salt, which is half potassium and can be found right next to regular salt in the supermarket and usually helps with leg cramps.

My daughter actually complains that her school day is too short, and she goes 8am-3:30pm. But she was in preschool until 6pm before, so I can see her point. On the other hand, I heard from a mom whose daughter was in preschool only a few hours a week before going to K that it took her pretty much the whole year to adjust to the full school day. I think Patrick will get used to it, and it is a good thing that they do gradual transitions so he can start when he is ready. And, hopefully, after the evaluations his school days will get more challenging.

[lorrie]

Hyland's Leg Cramps with Quinine. You can get them at Walmart. Don't know if it's safe for pregnant women.

[Cherith]

That same thing, charley horse, happened to me during a pregnancy. I literally woke from a sound sleep and jumped straight out of bed it hurt so badly.

I don't remember who or what or where, but somewhere I picked up the idea that a low level of potassium might be to blame. Eat a banana. ;)

I also remember hearing or reading, again I have no idea where, that to avoid such painful awakenings, every night before you go to bed grab your toes, or have them pushed towards you, in a full foot flex move, and stretch your calf muscle. You can also accomplish this by just standing on your toes on a stair and pushing your heel down. I think this is what worked like a charm for me. I started doing this quick little nightly stretch and I never had the problem again.

I feel your pain, I limped for days afterwards. Hope it feels better soon!

[Jo in Utah]

Calcium supplement, i.e. Tums, could be helpful, you need like 1200 mgs and it can help with contractions too sometimes. Good luck, I hate leg cramps.

I was at work when I commented above ... may I continue?

I remember reading somewhere that babes in utero are rocked to sleep / into inactivity when we are active - walking around, etc. But when we lie down to sleep - they wake up! Which is why newborns like to be carried around in slings, Bjorns, etc. - reminds them of the lulling when they were still on the inside.

Funny Charley Horse story: I had a friend who's mom told her to POINT HER TOE when she got one - poor woman tried it, repeatedly, of course only making the pain more excruciating. I guess not funny "ha-ha" ...

[MJ]

My son, who just turned 6, is in grade 1 this year and it's his first year of all-day school. He spends his weekends plotting ways to destroy the school but not injure any of the teachers or students so he never has to go again. I've asked him why he doesn't like school and his replies include: day is too long, he wants to be with me, why does everybody speak French (it's a French immersion school), doing things he doesn't want to do, the structure, the day is too long, can't be with me.

I've been advised by wiser parents that this is common and should pass. It doesn't, of course, keep me from obsessing it about it all day long (9 am-3.30 pm) and wondering if we sent him to the wrong school. So, my unsolicited advice would be to give it a bit of time and then re-assess. That's what I'm doing while continuing to obsess about it. I call that multi-tasking.

As for the cramps, I had potassium (that looks like it's spelled wrong but I'm too tired to look up the correct spelling) recommended. And the tried-and-true source of potassium is bananas.

[electric boogaloo]

These comments are just all over the place aren't they? I have no helpful advice but what the heck:

1. Even though bananas are supposed to help tremendously with leg cramps, I suggest not eating them while pregnant - or any other time - because it is my expert opinion that bananas are gross.

2. Yes, that is a long day. I can't focus on anything for that many hours.

3. Hahaha I am laughing at Steve and thinking he should have acted like he did it on purpose. So one baby can control the lights in the other baby's room, which will be useful for communicating in Morse code and for making the other one go the ef to sleep if they are being noisy.

4. Tell him French and Spanish are basically the same thing.

5. Oh and! Have you thought about green? There's a color at Lowe's called Leaf Bud that I absolutely adore. If you pair it with white or nuetrals it's soft and soothing. If you pair it with deep red, it looks retro. If you put it with lavendar or light blue it looks adorable and baby-roomish.

6. Not that you should let anyone else tell you what color to paint your babies' rooms.

7. Hahahahaaa I just remembered again about the light switch switch. Awesome.

[Coral]

Cramps: New theory is that a lack of iron causes cramps. So I make sure I take dolomite (magnesium and calcium), and iron. When you are actually having a cramp, huge deep breaths make it ease off. Someone told me that it was to do with an oxygen lack to the muscle. I don't know about that but the deep breaths do ease it off quickly.

[jk]

Sorry about the cramps, no help from me...but if you think your son is in for a long day, my daughter's kindergarten went from 8-12:30 for one month, and now we are at full days 8-3. Talk about one tired kid! She's not an early riser, which just adds to the misery... I've been a fan of the all-day kindergarten for some time. Just be prepared for the meltdowns.

[Sarah]

I had leg cramps at night when I was pregnant too, no advice to offer I'm afraid, just to say, yes, it is extremely difficult rolling around with cramps and a belly full of baby. And also I haven't had any more since she was born.
And also, the midnight parties? I was told that the walking around you do during the day naturally rocks them to sleep. They get lots of nice rest giving them the energy to party all night. Yay

[lisak]

I just skimmed the comments, but has no one asked what the doc had to say about the state of your recent (not usual) precarious mental health and how that relates to the reglan? Or your continuing nausea? Most curious and ever so glad the 13's are well and good. Patrick continues to make me smile.

[Colleen]

I think Patrick will do OK in the full day setting. After all, lots of children go to daycare all day and have to be "on" and they do fine. At least your school starts later-- my son's elementary starts at 7:40!
If you are feeling uncomfortable with the school for no real reason, you might consider volunteering there. Especially in K, they often use parent volunteers while teachers do one-on-one assessments. If you were volunteering say, once a week, then you would get a good feel for how the classroom runs and how Patrick is doing in it. Just a thought!
Also, hate to say it, but here it is. I am a special education teacher, and I had a regular parent volunteer last year. Having someone who could come in and work one-on-one with my lower students while I worked with the o thers was amazing. Really. I felt like writing down this woman's name and drawing little hearts around it. And, I am sure that I treated her child better because of it. It is impossible to help those good feelings for the mom from spilling over into your treatment of the child.

[Pam L]

I must agree with the volunteering thing. I did this once a week for the first 3 years of my younger son's schooling. It was selfish on my part, although I was a useful volunteer, but mostly I wanted to see what really goes on there. That is where I gained such great respect for the classroom teachers. They worked hard and were awesome as far as dealing with 20 or so kids all day long. I don't think I could do it.

[Amanda]

Can I add to the unsolicited information?
Am I right in thinking you are injecting heparin still? I did with both my successful pgs (recurrent miscarrier with Factor V Leiden - so low molecular weight heparin injections daily) & the drs recommended I took Calcium supplements. I also find that I tend to get cramp when I haven't had enough fluid - so drink more water (great when you feel nauseous already).
Hope that hasn't gone too drive-by advice on you.
Loving the stories of Patrick's school :) Loving the twin pg. You take care.

[Scissorbill]

Get up and bear weight on the offending leg.

[Lisa]

Try a heating pad for your calf. That helped me out. As far as Patrick's school, always trust your 'mommy instinct'.

[Nicky]

Can you not tell Patrick that he *is* learning French? I mean, it's not like he can tell the difference, right?

[Laurie]

If you are having leg cramps eat bananas or other foods high in potassium if you can. Remember that if you don't eat and get the proper nutrients to sustain a pregnancy especially a twin pregnancy the babies will take what they need from your body and depleat them. You don't have to eat huge meals but snack all day long. Check out the healthfood store and see if they have some sort of vitamin powder that you can add to practically anything you drink. I can't think of the name of it but I know that my friend who had quads used it. (Lot of help there) Leg cramps like that signal low potassium.
Also on the school note, it's not unusual for him to be going to school that long. My daughter who is in kindergarten goes from 7am to 1:25. She gets up at six a.m every morning. Next year she will actually go an hour and a half longer. This is public school.
All of my kids have had disappointments regarding curriculum. They all started kindergarten with their own agendas of what they wanted to learn and what they felt they knew well enough. If you truly want a curriculum solely catered to your child your best bet would honestly be to homeschool or hire a personal tutor to teach him in your home. There are many times that I've wished I've done that myself in dealing with teachers, school etc. Just keep talking to him about his day. If you want to know what your child is learning ask his teacher. Keep in communication with his teachers. If you have concerns then discuss them with his teacher because that is a part of what she is there for. If he isn't being challenged then talk to her and find out what you all can work together and do about it. Hope I was helpful.

[Pam L]

The one caution I have regarding getting more challenging work from the school for Patrick is to be careful they are not just giving him MORE work, busy work, instead of more challenging or stimulating lessons. My sons ran into this, and although they had the IQ,and could do it, they felt like they were being punished for that by having more work to do than others. They're still kids and don't like homework any more than other kids, for the most part.

[Brooke]

Are you only buying the one carseat? If so, you might want to make sure that Patrick's old one (assuming that is what you will be using) won't be expired before you are done with it. Since most seats are good for 6 years from date of manufacture, you should probably be fine. Patrick is, what, 5? And depending on how long before he was born you got it, and how long before that it was made, and how long you intend to use it, you might need a new one.

[Tine]

Just popping in to say "yay!" on the good baby report. Yay!

[Christiana]

On the paint: We're specifically doing gender neutral in the baby's room for future options, even though we plan to find out the gender in time to paint. We're doing a pale, sage green which we have gotten many compliments on. I grew up in a house where my father only ever allowed us to have white walls and I always hated it as a kid, but I was a very colorful child.

My kindergarten was 8:30-3:15, but we had a 2 hour nap time just before the end of the day, so it wasn't all-day activity. Do they still do nap time in Kindergarten?

The onl thing I know about preventing cramps is increasing your potassium - I've heard avacados are great for this (do you feel like guac?)

[Vanessa]

For the leg cramps - I had one so severe I was hopping around naked, which is always what one wants to see (I'm pretty sure I resembled squid, only with a voice a cartoon character would love.) My boy took hold of me, laid me down, reached down (no, this isn't the part where he lustily unties my stays and corset and ravishes me on the deck of our pirate ship. See: twin pregnancy. See also: naked squid) and flexed my foot flat. The cramps went away instantly. When the aches come back, if you have Steve flex your foot flat, it will kill off the ache, it even helps when the cramp has passed.

And there's always that pirate ship hope to boot.

[melissa]

I wanted to post this on the Redbook site (to get you the brownie points) but it's not letting me get to the comment section right now. But anyway, all I wanted to say was:

Nothing pregnancy-related to comment on, but only this: my God, you're a spectacular writer. Seriously, your posts are among the highlights of my day.

[Liz]

Another vote for getting out of bed and getting some weight on the leg - fast. I've always had charley horses at night and that's always worked for me. Of course, the leaping out of bed part was a little harder while I was pregnant. It (the leaping) also freaks out the person in bed with you, which is fun.

[L]

Ouch to the leg cramps. I had them with both of the pg. They were quite bad I even ended up breathing through them using the labor technique and wondering how I would ever get through the labor if leg cramps could bring me to tears.

As for Patrick, go and talk to the teacher about the curriculum and don't hesitate to ask what they teach those who know all that. I had a wonderful discussion with my son's teachers yesterday which started exactly like that. It ended up with "We've never had a child like that" (which scared me though). I am really thankful that it took them only seven days to figure it out. They told me about lots of things they could still teach him at least in math. He will still most likely have to jump through a few hoops to get to a new material but at the very least the teachers and I are on the same page.

[peggy]

Just a note to say I love the new widget that connects directly to REDBOOK! (jazz hands)