Fort.Night

I was on vacation.

Specifically, I was on the best vacation I have ever taken in my entire life; including (after judicious consideration) that time my father took me to Disneyworld for my eighth birthday. We went to [edit: Tyler Place in] Vermont and it was amazing. As I announced on Friday: "I have never had so much fun and..." I held up my hand as Patrick opened his mouth, "I DON'T CARE whether you or you or you or you agree."

Not that the rest of the family didn't enjoy themselves; they did. Every morning at 8:30 a delightful woman named Barbara showed up at our cabin to collect Caroline and Edward and wheel them off for breakfast followed by five mommy-free hours of snacks, songs, swimming, lunch and the occasional boat and/or hay ride. Patrick joined a cadre of six and seven year olds for woodworking and fishing and rock climbing and nature walking and general whatnoting (he also was breakfasted and lunched, although as he tells the story he ate nothing but pineapple and bread for seven days - like I care.) Having disposed of the children Steve and I would roll up to the inn where there were all kinds of good things to eat. On the first day I ate ten pieces of bacon. Then I gave the matter some thought and returned to the buffet for six more. We mini-golfed. We shot arrows. We did a low ropes obstacle thing that was surprisingly fun despite a rocky start (team building began with a trust circle where you close your eyes and flop backwards and - without naming names - SOMEONE, SOMEONE who I really should have been able to trust dropped me. but I forgive) and an undignified ending (to scale a twelve foot wall Steve and an accomplice threw me into the air without first checking to see if anyone was ready to catch me - they were not, I dangled like a participle.) I took three naps on three successive days that each lasted over two hours and for the first time since the twins were born I feel like I have actually gotten enough sleep. And if there was anything nicer than watching Barbara leave with the twinkles in the morning it was knowing that she would be coming back at 5:30 in the evening to take them off to dinner before returning to put them to bed while I shamed myself during karaoke night.

We went to camp and, like I said, it was the best vacation ever.

In no particular order:

- It never ceases to amaze me how long it takes me to get one family ready for a week's vacation. I literally spent all day, every day the week before we left getting organized and packed. I had a four page list of things I wanted to bring, especially Patrick's passport and birth certificates for the babies so that we could take advantage of being so close to one of my favorite cities in the world and go to Montreal for a day. Oh how I love Montreal. So it was disappointing that I remembered everybody's travel documents but mine. I was bummed about this for the first half of the trip but Patrick later crossed the border by boat and he assured me that the water on the Canadian side looked exactly the same as the American water, so I wasn't missing anything. I told him, yeah, but Canadians themselves are seven feet high and purple so it really was a shame we didn't see any. Not to mention the fact that every street corner in Montreal has racks filled with free chicken pot pie. He is uncertain as to whether or not he believes me.   

- It then took me two full days to unpack and do laundry.

- JFK has got to be the worst freaking airport in the entire world. OH MY GOD. We flew out with a connection through Detroit and although it was a horrible hour of the morning (we left here at 5:30 am) the trip was surprisingly bearable. The return through New York, however, was a misery. They kept putting us on little shuttle buses and letting people afflicted with both vertigo and a death-wish zip us under the wheels of massive, taxiing 747s. Since Steve had the brilliant but only marginally effective idea of strapping car seats on either end of our stroller - picture if you will a six foot long stroller with full-sized car seats fore and aft - we could only move in one direction and we took up enough room for a family ten times our size. As an aside, we opted to bring the car seats with us on the plane. This was less in deference to keeping the twinks safe and more in hopes they would recognize the futility of even trying to escape (looking at you, Cypress Caroline) and just sleep. It mostly worked, too, so the embarrassment of pressing through airports like a circus caravan was worth it.

- Edward's eyelid eczema is doing much better with the Aquaphor, thank you. Also, weird as this sounds, I think the multiple trips to the chlorinated pool really helped him. His arms and legs are much better. 

- Patrick got accepted as a Davidson Young Scholar. This is a nonprofit out of... uh, I don't know... not here... Utah? no Nevada... that provides educational assistance for kids like Patrick. I'm very pleased. We like his school and want to keep him there but we needed some help figuring out how that could work and I think Davidson will be able to provide this.

- Edward made a friend at camp. I don't know why I think this is so amazing and cute, but I do. Every morning they would go do stuff at the toddler playhouse and Edward would seek out a little boy named AJ so they could push a rocket car together. Caroline, meanwhile, would scout the perimeter, dancing her little Cricket dance (on her toes, shoulders wiggling) and try to climb out the window.

- Patrick's favorite part was the fishing. Much to my surprise Patrick is turning into quite the outdoorsman; all raspberry-picking, lichen-discussing, mushroom-hunting and small mouth bassifying. I asked if he had made any friends in his group.

"Oh YES," he said. "There's this one kid that I just love."

"What's his name?" I asked, pleased.

"I don't know. Look we're just here for the week; it's fine. Did you make friends?"

I thought about the low ropes group that objectively critiqued my centers of gravity as they decided the best way to turn me sideways and cram me through a hole.

"Nevermind."

- Patrick continues to be healthy, knock wood. His pediatrician has given him a month to be fever and -itis free or... actually I don't know what the "or" is. Tonsil removal? Another round of IV antibiotics? I just know that I keep prodding Patrick's neck and that I stick a thermometer into his mouth every time he opens it (not really. ok. yes. really.)

- Edward was given his first pair of sunglasses and now he wears them all the time. I mean all of the time that he is not holding them in one hand and gesticulating with them like a professor. Like a cool professor. A professor of jazz, maybe.

 

- It is becoming clear to me that Caroline has an addictive personality. She tried goldfish crackers for the first time at approxiately 3:10 Sunday afternoon. By 3:28 she had grabbed both of my ears, pressed her nose against mine and hissed, "FFFFFFFFFSSSSSSSSSH! FFFFFFFFFFFSSSSSSSSSH!" I would say they were like crack but that's kinda an insult to crackheads. Then there is her music. I cannot pinpoint the exact moment that Caroline decided she needed music playing at all times but she has taken over Edward's music player (fair trade for Eardeer and Legdeer I suppose) and it is hard to get her to let go of the damned thing.

Patrick dressed them all today.

This is the Salute to Edward version.

Note that she moves but the music thing remains firmly in hand. The entire time she had "A You're Adorable" on loop. God help us all.

- At the beginning of this post I was heading toward some specific question. Something that I have been meaning to ask. Now I have no idea what that was. Damn it. Any questions for me?

- I missed you and I hope you had a nice couple of weeks.

- An amusing/disturbing aspect to Edward's sunglass obsession is that he still has the iris cysts that (we think) make it difficult to see when the light changes. So as soon as he gets his sunglasses on he almost invariably careens into a wall. Oh, and he puts his fat hand up and says, "EYE!" He did this to me today and I said, "Eye? Yes. The glasses are on your eyes." And he put his palm into my face and repeated "Eye! Eye! EYE!" And then I realized he wanted me to slap his hand: "High five!"

"Eye eye!" 

He's going to be the cool one, I just know it.

PS Yes, the Tyler Place. Loooooooved it. In fact, I think I am in love with it - as I keep thinking about it and I wonder if it is thinking of me... . As far as I know they have a few openings later in the summer so if the idea of ditching providing stimulating summerfun for your children while you nap compete in the mini triathalon appeals to you then by all means give 'em a call. Two caveats: it is not cheap by which I mean it was expensive (and no, we could not really afford it this year) and if you go and love it so much that you tell everyone you know and then there is no room for me next year I shall track you down, create a trust circle and drop you.

Comments

[Annabelle]

Sounds like a lovely vacation...I'm living vicariously through you this summer, so thanks for going!
And yes, CTY is great. My brother and I did summer programs through them, and it was wonderful to be amongst all the OTHER, well, nerds (and boy, were we nerdy! but we turned out to be productive members of society!). DYS sounds fantastic from others' comments - I hope it works out well for Patrick.

[The Girl]

So I kept checking in, saying "Julia must've posted today. It's been two weeks. TWO WEEKS. Where does she live, the MOON?" But then... yeah, so, you were on vacation. And I'm psychotic. Sooo very sorry. But YAY for the good time, boo to the dropping (STEVE! WTF, MAN!?) and Lordy, but your children are beautiful.

Cricket: Elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist, wrist, Sugarplum.

[Gina]

Oh good lord that place looks amazing! Maybe their is hope for a vacation for us next summer (I've got a 3 month old and a 2.7 year old).

And I love those pictures of the kids. It gives me an urge to go buy some rit dye and T-shirts as I believe we only have one tie-dyed onesie in our wardrobe.

[Nancy Johnson]

SOunds like you had the best of times! Wish I had known you were in my neck of the woods (relatively speaking!) How I would of loved to hang out with you...umm...well, especially your kids, who I am in love with! YOU? I like you VERY VERY much! :)

Nancy in CT

[Mary]

Re: Edward's excema, my brother used to have it bad and my mom would hold a sunlamp over him to clear it up. I wonder if it's the light rather than the chlorine that helped?

Your vacation sounds heavenly, I want one!

[unexplained]

So glad you're back! Missed you terribly. Glad you had a wonderful vay-cay...

[You Gotta Be Kidding]

Like $7,000 for a week, plus airfare to get there?

Remind me what kind of trust fund you have.

[Priscilla]

Welcome back! Tyler Place makes me think of Dirty Dancing the movie. :)

[Amanda]

WOW they are so cute.

I'm curious to find out if you "used" $800 worth of electricity while you were away? Inquiring minds want to know...

[Heather]

I am so looking that place up. A vaction with the child but not WITH the child all the time?? Who invented such a wonderful concept. Someone should give them a medal!!

[winecat]

I missed you as well. I'd forgotten about the vacation so I checked every day to make sure you were all still in one piece.

The tie-dye group photo with the sunglasses has to best ever!

Glad you had so much fun and I love it when you mess with Patrick's head, kids are so literal I can almost imagine his replies.

[winecat]

Woo, just googled the Davidson program - Sounds like heaven on earth for Patrick.

[erin]

HIlarious! I don't even have kids and I want to go to camp!

Adorable pictures. Re: the solo shot of Edward wearing the sunglasses, he kind of looks like the baby version of that guy from the movie Twilight. Albeit, a tanner, non-scruffy, adorable baby version. I think it's the hair. (And yes, I mean this as a compliment!)

[Shauna McGlynn]

OMG-my cousin just got back from Tyler Place (can't WAIT to go there!). Her little guy is nicknamed AJ-too weird if it was the same one. Her kids are Aiden, Ava and Antonio. Same people?

[Bridget]

Yes, dermatologists love the bleach bath! Some kids have a lot of inflammation from low levels of bacteria infecting their eczema, and 1/8-1/4 cup of bleach in the bathtub will clear that right up...

[Redhead]

I need a Barbara! For a holiday fortnight (or two weeks' vacation if you prefer) but also at other times too. Please. Not sure I would like all the group activities though. I'm probably much to shy and British for all that.
Great pictures.
And I have a question. Does Patrick ever allude to the times before the twins were born? As in, things were easier/more fun/less annoying for him then? I have a 6 year gap between my two. So, just curious.
Thank you.

[Catherine]

Julia, I have a 4 year old who we suspect is very much "like Patrick". I found the message boards at Davidson Young Scholar about a year ago and they have provided me so much relief and information to stop the worrying. We're planning on applying in a year or 2. Hurrah for Patrick. It seems like a wonderful program.

[Kate P.]

We are headed back to Tyler Place for our second year...and what they don't tell you in the brochure is that you will get a second mortgage or sell one of your children to get back there every year!! Welcome to the Tyler Place Addicts Club.

[Nimble]

You had a real vacation. With fun and change and leaving responsibility behind and everything! Shocking.

[QoB]

I want to echo Hannia about the Centre for Talented Youth. I went to the Irish version (CTYI in DCU) from the age of 12-15 and it was one of the best things my parents ever encouraged me to do. I met many of my closest friends there, some of them from the US, and it was fantastic experience for kids for whom school is too slow-paced. I can't recommend it enough, but the residential programs might obviously have to wait for a few years...

[JoAnn]

Poor Steve, being maligned for dropping you...Tyler Place should give you and Julie a kickback, because I know for sure we'll be there next summer! (We're down south, and have weird school breaks, so I'm sure it won't impact your family - I promise! Meaning that we won't crowd up the place during your vacation, nor will we stalk you.)

[katie]

that sounds like the best summer vacation ever! and while montreal is all well and good, i really like burlington. not that it matters, but that's where i'd sneak off to for a day. glad it was such a success!

[Heather]

I seriously love your blog!!

[Aurelia]

I am definitely seven feet tall and purple and eat chicken pot pie for every meal, along with Montreal smoked meat. Show Patrick this comment and tell him that the next time he comes to Canada he can see me and my fellow countrymen for himself!

[terri c]

I owe Steve an apology now that I know who REALLY dropped you. Tyler place sounds like heaven on earth and much, MUCH better than any theme park.

[RaeAnn]

Not having the time to read all previous comments I will add this: The allergist treating my 4 year old's eczema prescribed twice a week bleach baths or swimming pool time as part of his regimen. So, not so odd at all.

[Maggie]

Ahh I am so anxious to find a Tyler Place in or near California! Anyone, anyone?? I see some family camps but can't tell if they have "Barbaras"

[jessica]

That salute to Edward picture should be your Christmas card picture. They all look so happy. It is adorable.

[Slim]

When a toddler does the face smash to me, I am inclined to melt and provide whatever is demanded. Send Miss C my way, wouldja?

[Audrey]

So glad to hear you had a wonderful time! After all the stress, you needed it. I'm still in the process of trying to get myself a small person of my very own, but when I do, I'll definitely have to keep Tyler Place in mind!

[Helen]

How did Caroline and Edward handle being away from you during the vacation? Since they stay at home with you, was the transition to a day-care type situation difficult for them or you?

[Helen]

Just read YouGottaBeKidding's comment and is that so .... 7K a week? So nevermind on the separation question, because it looks like we'll definitely not make it to Tyler ever and ah, it's nice to be with my kid for now anyway. :)

[sheilah]

Hahaha...so funny that poor Steve got blamed for dropping you (Julie was probably laughing uproariously at everyone's wrong guess...).

What did you do to get Patrick tested for that program? My son is about a year younger than Patrick and I would like to see if he qualifies for this.

[Kathy Jean]

For those interested, a picture of Steve's WHOLE face on: www.alittlepregnant.com

So glad you BOTH got a well deserved break!

[Helen]

Not Kathy Bates. In that picture, he looks like George Clooney! (Referring to post from alittlepregnant - see above) You people are a riot, so much fun. :)

[jan]

I AM SO GLAD to hear that Patrick was accepted by Davidson - rather more that you obviously initiated it and fully realize ... Let him prosper and be the great man he is clearly fit to be.

[Tina]

The image of a double stroller with two car seats attached his hilarious. For anyone planning on taking a car seat on an airplane I love the Go Go Babyz Travelmate wheels that attach to the car seat. You can push them through the airport in their car seat and check your stroller as luggage (if you'll need a real stroller where you're going). I have dragged huge car seats through airports before, but now I'm sold on Go Go Babyz. I bought mine at Babies R Us.