Vir

In 2001 the NCAA Men's Basketball championship was held in Minneapolis. I was working downtown at the time and one afternoon a day or two before finals I called Steve and asked whether he thought we should get tickets. He said, oh that could be fun and then we went back and forth about whether we would want to watch Duke win (sorry) (and they did) or whether Maryland might have a chance (they did) (but then they did not.) We debated for quite a while. Then that night I went to my stats class and my professor devoted half the class to working out the statistical improbability of being allowed to purchase tickets to any given NCAA finals. In other words, Steve and I had wasted the better part of an afternoon trying to decide whether or not we felt like doing something that we could not have done even if we were desperate and had started the process a year earlier.

I thought about this when I called the pediatrician's office last week and said I would like to bring Caroline and Edward in for their missing vaccine (the Hib) and that we might as well get some flu shots while we were at it. Oh and I'd like to bring Patrick in as well. They said okey dokey, Hib on Thursday and... we'll put them on the waiting list for the flu shots.

Waiting list? I said.

Yes.

For the seasonal flu?

Yes.

And H1N1?

Yes.

Well ok then.

So after reading all of the comments and the links I thought and I bit my nails and then I thought some more and then I remembered how horrible it was when Caroline was getting oxygen through a nose cannula and I said oh to hell with that: flu shots for everybody! And having come to this momentous decision we are now on a waiting list.

It's actually sort of funny.

Meanwhile the father of our carpoolees is pretty sure that his scratchy throat is The Flu; a suspicion I tend to believe as he is: 1) a doctor and 2) a doctor who works in a hospital where H1N1 has been picking out paint samples.

I skipped communist playgroup today because my own throat is scratchy and although I just have a cold I assume the other parents would rather I kept it to myself. Also, despite my very best intentions and the nice people I still kinda hate playgroup and tend to leap at any chance to miss it. I feel guilty about this.

+

I took Edward for his follow up at the eye doctor. As you may recall Edward has clusters of cysts around the perimeter of his irises that his pediatrician (and all of his partners who casually wandered in during Edward's newborn check as word spread through the office that there was Something Interesting in room 9) thought were colobomas. For the first few months the cysts crowded the pupils of his eyes and it is unlikely that Edward was able to see. Eventually however his pupil widened and light started filtering past the cysts and the impression at his last appointment a year ago is that Edward's vision is not impaired. Still, she wanted to see him again closer to two years old and at the time I said, yeah, sure, whatever, because the idea of an entire year passing was hard to fathom. 

The crappy part of a pediatric eye appointment is that they start late and then they check the eyes before dilating them. Then you have to wait half an hour for the pupils to open and then they are late again and at the end of it all you have had to entertain a toddler for two and half hours in a very small space. With Caroline I think it would have been impossible unless they had let me open a heating duct and allowed her to crawl around through the walls like a gerbil in a Habitrail. Fortunately Edward is more easy-going and he was happy to sit on my lap while I read the books we had brought. Then I whipped out the mini MagnaDoodle (if you are going to buy only one thing that you always have in your purse for small children, let it be the MagnaDoodle) and drew pictures for him for a while. This was before they dilated his pupils and I was worried that afterward he would be fractious as he would no longer be able to see the books or the MagnaDoodled letters. I was surprised and amused to observe that Edward - far from being freaked out by his blurred vision - was totally into it. He kept holding up his hand and moving it closer and further away from his eyes.

It was all very "Whoa dude" tiny stoner and it kept him occupied for at least fifteen minutes.

This morning, however, his eyes are STILL dilated which I find weird. I had to keep helping him with his fork at breakfast since he was stabbing into the air rather than the french toast. 

Before they broke him with their atropine, though, the prognosis was good. He is a little farsighted which is apparently normal for the age and he responded appropriately to the lights and the lens and the creepy stuffed duck that they operate through a switch on the floor and which scared the fuck out of both of us. It accomplished its job, though, which was to get Edward to look up and perhaps its secondary purpose which was to get Edward to stare suspiciously in that direction for the rest of the visit.

The doctor said she would like to see him again in two years and I said yeah ok whatever because the idea of two years passing is hard to fathom.

+

Remember when I was trying to upload the ABC video?

Not only did it not work but it completely screwed up our internet access for almost a week, preventing me from doing pretty much anything online. Sure I guess I bonded with my children and I caught up on my stupid TV and I baked a lot of bread but being unable to download email both blows and sucks. We get internet through a satellite and they have this fair use agreement which is neither fair nor useful and to which we would never agree given any other option besides squirrel power. We are limited in the amount of data we are able to upload and download and if we exceed that in any twenty four hour period they throttle us and reduce us to a snail's pace. So irritating and I compounded the problem because I forgot that I had a window open (sorry it is a Mac; I guess they don't call them windows do they?) that kept trying to upload the video. So it persevered and as soon as we were unthrottled the video would attempt to post and bing! we'd be throttled again.

All of which is to say that I have already suffered to show you this abridged version of  the video of Edward so I will not apologize for my singing.

Aaaaaand roll 'em! Wait! Adjust your volume first, it might be loud.

PS New ads up. One for Uma Thurman who I am trying to buy as a modern mother (I mean she IS a mother, I know that) with the pacifier and the hair and the other for a book that I almost did not accept because I was afraid the tagline "get your J.A.P. on" would offend pretty much everybody. But then I clicked on the link and saw that it is a memoir about an American who moves to Japan and, hell, who I am to worry about that which is intended to be funny?

Comments

[jen w]

you might be able to get moved up on the waiting list due to Caroline's history. The high risk kids (and their families) get them before the rest!

[Lisa B in Seattle]

And we all say "yaaaaaaa!" :)

[TeacherMommy]

He. Is. Adorable.

Excuse me while I go get a spoon.

[Shannon M.]

Yes, I had a friend recently "sneak" her kid into the pediatrician's office to get the flu shot. The pediatrician, her friend, said to manufacture some illness when she called in for an appointment, bring her son in for a check and he'd give him the flu shot while there. Okie-dokey for sure.

Edward's singing is fabulous! And so is his mama's!

[Karen O]

Re: ". . . yeah ok whatever because the idea of two years passing in hard to fathom." Being (literally!) at the other end of that spectrum, I feel the same way when another colonoscopy rolls around. Luckily, the interval is more like five years.

And - if you ever get your local readers and bloggers together, I'd love to be on the list.

[Kelly]

same thing happened to me...I agonized over the decision and finally decided to get my 4 yr old daughter and my 16m old boys vaccinated and BAM! We're all on the wait list...and I got an email from my 4 year olds pre-school that H1N1 has officially enrolled. So exciting.

[Kim]

My son had his pupils dilated when he was 3 and it took about 24 hours to get back to normal. I think it's OK. Weird.

[Heidi]

I'm so sorry throttling was experienced in the makeing of that video. But oh my, I'm so appreciative of it this morning! How wonderful.

Your Asianesque soup is SO wonderful that a triple batch will travel two states to be served at an after-funeral gathering. That is how good it is, so thank you very much for sharing. (The rest of you--go to Julia Scrambled. Now. Second post down.)

[Not On Fire]

The H1N1 flu shot was officially approved in Canada today. Why you ask? I don't know. But we will be getting ours soon.

On another note, why is the font on your page so small all of a sudden?

[gretchen from lifenut]

We don't need the H1N1 shot because we have/had it. Based on our experience, get one ASAP. If your names come up on the list, do not hesitate. It was pretty bad, worse than I thought.

My 12yo daughter had her eyes dilated a few weeks ago. They took more than a day to go back to normal. It's not a look I like on a child. She thought it was funny, though and it gave her an excuse to wear sunglasses at school (a big no-no).

[Carla Hinkle]

I am pregnant and have been TRYING and TRYING to get an H1N1 shot (can't have the nasal b/c of aforementioned pregnancy) and let me tell you, I could not be more sick of the All The Pregnant Ladies! Get Your Shot! Or Very Bad Things Will Happen! hysteria. Because there is not a shot TO BE FOUND in California (where I live), anywhere, so far as I can tell. All the media hyping swine flu hysteria can bite me until someone can find a way to actually GIVE ME THE DAMN VACCINE.

[Corinne]

Sorry about eating your child whole, he was too delicious to resist. He's totally 1930's movie star with that lockjaw accent. I love it.

I'm fretting also about not being able to get the vaccines. Not helped by the fact that they HAD the regular vaccine, but ran out before less-than-organized moms made appointments. To quote the office person, "Well, we HAD it, BEFORE, if you'd called SOONER." Thanks!

About the satellite access: I feel your pain. We had Direcway for quite a while until my rage got the better of me and I screamily canceled our service. Then, faced with no internet service (we too live in the sticks) I found out about cellular internet. We got a modem from Verizon (our wireless carrier) and a router from Kyocera that allows us to share it among all computers in the house and I love it. It is limited bandwidth (5 GB per month) but unless you watch movies on line you probably won't hit it.

[Lama]

We got our regular flu shots at the ped office, but now they have stopped giving them and they are still waiting on their order of H1N1 to come. I did a little search and found out that some CVS are giving them for kids age 6m to 24 years, so I'm taking my 4 year old boy girl twins today !! My twins were preemies and I'm scared to death of the H1N1 virus, which unlike any other flu where usually 90% of the fatalities happen in people 65 and older, for this flu, the fatalities are 90% in people YOUNGER than 65 !!http://health.usnews.com/articles/health/healthday/2009/10/20/swine-flu-still-strikes-younger-people-hardest.html
My son is borderline asthmatic, and I don't want to take any chances !
BTW, I'm just a lurker who is in love with your writing, and all your children are ADORABLE!

[plumwin]

Oh Edward the tiny stoner! That made me laugh. A few months back our two year old had to have dental surgery and was given liquid valium in the waiting room before being brought back. They said it would take about three minutes to work. Sure enough he was racing around like a nut one minute and then he just turned around (completely stoned) and said "I love you mom. I love you too dad. No, I really, really, really love you both" and then he slid to the floor. We both burst out laughing.

[Jenn]

My husband has asthma and even HE is on the list for a flu shot. I mean, criminey's sake, if someone with a chronic illness can't get a flu shot, who can? Old people, apparently.

[sheilah]

He is so pleased with himself he doesn't even want to finish the song. He is quite adorable (as are all your children).

(wish I were still in the Twin Cities as I would take you up on your meeting invite...)

[Gina]

Let me just say "Amen" on the magna doodle. Ours has done time in countless waiting rooms as well as travelled the country providing hours of amusement.

And I feel your frustration regarding the the flu shots. I have an auto-immune disease and am on two immune-suppressants and I cannot find any mercury-free flu shots to save my life! Arrgh.

[Snarky Mommy]

Amen on the MagnaDoodle!!! We have one for each child in the mini size and a large one the two kids share at home. They love it and the 30 seconds of peace it brings me are so worth it.

[deborah (formerly of The Trying Game)]

Okay, that was totally freaky. Your voice sounds EXACTLY like mine on that video.

[Robbi]

Hi Julia! Just wanted to comment and say that I live in Detroit, and my kids are on a waiting list for the flu shot as well. Frusterating right!?

[Tine]

Psst...Minnesotans in search of H1N1 vaccine, check this: http://www.health.state.mn.us/cgi-bin/idepc/h1n1_fluschedule/fluclinic_search.cgi and then call your clinic.

Also, I noted a week or so ago (not sure if this is still true) that even though many regular clinics were out of the seasonal flu shot, a lot of pharmacies and store-based quick clinics (Target, CVS, Cub, Walgreens, etc.) still had them. In my experience only Target Minute Clinic would vaccinate little kids (under age 9 or 10) though. My kids are 3 and 6; I made a *lot* of phone calls and wasted van trips before I figured this out.

[Aunt Becky]

I would officially like to tongue kiss the makers of the Magna Doodle.

[Ruth]

I bought WB a MagnaDoodle to use while we were visiting my parents this year. My mother almost didn't give it to her because the package clearly stated that it was only for ages three and up (do they think a child will garrote his/herself on that short little string?). I assured her it was o.k. and she gave in graciously, although I suspect that she still thinks I am sometimes a tad too cavalier with her granddaughter's safety.

Four of the six of us have had flu shots, the rest are on waiting lists. We will be using a lot of soap, water, and hand lotion this winter.

[Helen]

I had to click on the ad just to make sure it was Uma Thurman. That's a great ad. Strange, but good for clicks.

My son (2 yrs) and I both got the nasal spray with live swine flu today (drove very far and waited over an hour in waiting room full of sick kids)... We're nowhere near you (many states away unfortunately), so sorry about the availability issues. My son also sneezed right away when we went out the door so who knows what's in his nose at this point. Also, out of 4 people from that office, 2 said he'll need another dose in 4 weeks. The other 2 people at the check-in area said he won't need another dose, because "they just changed it." Lots of confused people out there, including me.

[Gina]

Was grocery shopping in a store with no pharmacy to speak of and they were lining up to get their flu shot at a folding table set up in the produce section. Seniors only, no one under the age of 65 certainly, but as I stood there with my bananas in hand I had to question their decision to give this vaccine in the only part of the store where the food is not packaged?

I left my cart and went shopping at another store.

[Candy]

My boss (who I hate today so it pains me write anything about him) has eyes that, when dilated, take at least 24 hours to un-dilate. He actually has to miss work because he can't see to drive. I thought he was making it up (not hard to believe) but maybe he and Edward share this in common??

[Kristina]

Henry's eyes stayed dilated for almost 24 hours. And then it went away.

[CaraH]

My God, but that video was cute.

[cursingmama]

Ditto on the pharmacy/target/walgreens/cvs/etc... clinics having seasonal flu shots available.

[Sarah]

When we complain about health care, we should consider that the delay in starting to make the H1N1 flu shot vaccine is possibly a consequence of our health care system and the fear of liability. Here in the Maryland suburbs of D.C. there was H1N1 last year in late April or May. Schools were closing then. Production should have started then, but a lot of waffling around happened. I believe that vaccine was not begun (and then not in the U.S.) until real summer. All the children will already have been sick before the vaccine is distributed. While the media is wailing about one thing and another, I am not hearing them ask why this vaccine was not ready. Surely it couldn't be because those who make the laws are not in a high risk group for H1N1, unlike the seasonal flu. Have they no grandchildren?
Also, as I am on a tirade, consider the situation of my neighbor who has a $20 co-pay for each "shot." Her 1-year old requires 4 injections, two for each flu, and her 7-year old is not a candidate for nasal spray. She has saved co-pay for her 10-year-old and herself by getting nasal spray at clinics, but she is still looking at real out-of-pocket money, if the shot were to be available from her pediatrician. Today this neighbor tried a clinic for her baby, only to find four blocks of people in line for 200 injections. Insult added to injury in that the county was towing cars of those who tried to wait for the "mist." Some were illegally parked!
All of this, because I wanted to say that my son has to go to bed after having his eyes dilated, and the dilation lasts a long time. Some people are evidently more sensitive. I am off the soapbox now. I look for your posts every day, and I actually told someone I got the good cous cous cakes recipe from a friend. Then I remembered we are not actually friends--I'm just a wannabe.

[Meegan]

Yaaaay! Cute video.

We are also a waiting list for the flu vaccine. Well, the children are. I had received mine on impulse, as I noticed the "Flu Shots Here!" sign at the pharmacy. Wish they could do them for the babies as well. Nuts.

[VHMPrincess]

Those looking for the h1n1 vax - CALL YOUR COUNTY HEALTH department. Ours has plenty and has a FLU VAX clinic EVERY DAY but are NOT advertising because they are ALREADY being overrun w/out advertising and requiring the POLICE to monitor the line. So - the health depts and ped offices are getting it first - call them. Our ped has it to, but only the vials of shots w/thimerisol{sp}. The health dept had flu-mist for healthy children and adults and shots for everyone else.

[Maggie]

aaaaaa! I love that video! I watched it about 4 times one right after the other and for some reason it is wacking my funny bone just right and my eyes are all teary. Maybe because I suspect Edward is totally stringing you along :)

[Northwoods Baby]

FWIW, we got our flu shots at the County Health Department office. No waiting list, just a call to make an appointment. And free for the nibblets, which is always nice. Of course, Wisconsin may operate differently from Minniesoda, but I doubt it's too much so.

[Doug]

Likewise the local Kaiser has a limited supply at pediatrics but they're not "advertising" it. If you know where to look on their website it shows up as an option, but basically they're just handing them out to people who are there for "well baby" or "well child" visits although they will take drop-ins if you're in a priority group. Presumably they'll do their usual flu shot mass emails when they have enough extra to handle the results... anyway my 6 month old got her H1N1 shot today. She already had her seasonal so it's two more visits for the two boosters. Luckily it's free (Kaiser doesn't charge for flu shots - it saves them money so they don't want any barriers).

[Ali]

Long time reader delurking here! I am a college student living in a dorm and 3 or 4 types of flu, including H1N1, have been running rampant here since the first week of school. Since you share literally EVERYTHING at college with about 4,000 other people, even copious amounts of Purell and handwashing aren't enough sometimes. The health center ran out of flu vaccines in 2 days (before I was able to get one) and isn't getting more. I just started volunteering in the Emergency Department of the biggest hospital in the region, which of course is a whole basket full of flu. As a volunteer in a high-risk area, I am eligible for free seasonal and H1N1 vaccines from the hospital, but not until allllll the other hospital workers are vaccinated, so who knows when that will be. Just last week I read your post and thought "wow, I hope I can stay healthy until I get vaccinated" and of course the next morning I woke up with the flu. I don't know if it was H1N1 or a seasonal type because the health center stopped testing but boy was I sick. For anyone out there who may still be deciding on whether to get vaccinated, DO IT! (Or at least get on a waiting list!) Obviously I didn't die from the flu but I could barely sit up for days and I do not wish that upon anyone.

[Flicka]

I used to work for an eye doctor and we did LOTS of dilations. Anyone with light eyes, kids included, tend to stay dilated for 24-48 hours. My mom has light blue eyes and she always looks stoned for at least two days. It annoys her no end. She is not as relaxed as Edward about it all. But Caroline? If you have her dilated, she'll probably revert back within hours. It is wierd, you're totally right. Atropine is strange stuff.

Love your beautiful children! My husband enjoys it when I read snippets of your blog aloud to him...we both laugh. :) And because of you we're doing a CSA box next year. (Read about it at Scrambled.)

[Julia]

Warning: unsolicited advice.

Is the eye doctor a pediatric ophthalmologist? If not you mmight want to have Edward checked by one of them as well. There's this whole thing about the nerves and the brain cells developing through use during infancy and early childhood, and if vision in one eye is disrupted for long, it can lead to further troubles down the line. Kids reach visual maturity at about 6, so if you are going to need to do something, now is the time. A regular ophthalmologist may not be as up to speed on those issues.

My son had completely different problems with one of his eyes, infantile glaucoma (which we had never heard of). Even after the glaucoma was resolved we fought amblyopia for years because of the few weeks (maybe months, I can't even remember) the vision in that eye was impaired.

[Jody]

Two thoughts:

The director of Uma Thurman's movie said that, as a working mom herself, she felt that Thurman's SAHM character was "feeling a little sorry for herself" because combining work with children is not that hard. Also they dressed Thurman like a slob in the movie because, even though New York SAHMs look put-together, it's not possible for them to be both put-together and as beautiful as Uma Thurman.

So that's not a movie I plan to see, thanks.

And my second thought, triggered by your reference to Caroline in the heating ducts, is that if you haven't introduced The Mysterious Benedict Society to Patrick yet, you should.

[Aurelia]

That video? Is that you speaking?

Mildly freaked here, because you and I have the EXACT SAME VOICE. Admittedly I am stuffed up as we speak, so slightly diff today....but otherwise?

My husband just turned and asked why I was on a video talking to someone else's baby....weird.

[Nik M. Sonfield]

Dear Julia,

Hi, my name is Nik Sonfield and I’m writing on behalf of Mind’s Eye Productions and it’s founder, Deirdre Fishel. We love your blog and thought that you and your readers might be interested in Deirdre’s latest documentary, “Sperm Donor X.” The film follows three single women and their experiences as they attempt to become pregnant using sperm donors.

As the daughter of a single mother who chose to use a sperm donor, I believe strongly in this project. I hope you will take the time to visit our website, mindseyeprods.com, for further information. We need more media material that humanizes the sperm donor process! Get “Sperm Donor X” and share it with your friends and community! We need your support!

Here is a little more information from Deirdre about her documentary:

My name is Deirdre Fishel and I have just completed editing a deeply personal documentary that follows me and three other diverse women as we decide to pursue single motherhood, navigate the bizarre waters of picking sperm donors over the internet, deal with our parents, try to get pregnant, and ultimately embrace how lucky we are to be alive now and able to create joyous families of biological and adopted children.

I started the project six years ago, filming myself and the other women for two years. But when my kids were born I took a hiatus, for many reasons. Two years later the call to continue came when a friend wrote an article on single mothers by choice. These women were freaks. They were humorless, even their children seemed to bring them no joy. I become obsessed with telling the story from the inside. The film received a New York State Council of the Arts grant which took it through more shooting. Editing has just been completed by a two-time Academy Award nominee who worked on deferment because he believed so strongly in the project. Now all we need is to raise finishing funds to get it out.

The film is fiscally sponsored by WOMEN MAKE MOVIES, so all donations are tax deductible. Give a $100, get a DVD and a credit on the film. But no donation is too small. Or if you want to help in another way give a house party where you show the film and invite your friends. Every dollar counts. My contact info is ph: 917-922-7845 email:deirdref@mindspring.com. Go to mindseyeprods.com or stilldoingit.com to learn more about me and my work.

Only six percent of children will grow up in a traditional family, meaning two straight people, who marry first, have kids and don't separate. We need more images that show that while going it alone certainly isn't easy, alternative families are in now way second best. Thanks in advance for your support!

Checks can be made to Women Make Movies and sent to Deirdre Fishel, 406 Douglass St., Brooklyn, NY 11217

[Elaine]

Are all you bloggers sponsoring that book, "Get your J.A.P. On?" I've seen it on more former IF blogs than I can count...and notice it probably because I live in Japan and am very, very cynical that anybody can write anything new about living in Japan (shoot me, but there it is.)

Just curious

[Cookie]

The H1N1 seems to be the hardest to get for toddlers. My pediatrician's office had the seasonal flu and the H1N1 for older kids, so my 4yo got it, but not for the under 2 set. We're supposed to call back each week to see if they have it in.

[Stephanie]

As you very well know, Edward is adorable. Simply adorable!

[www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=563611337]

Ack! The cute! The unbearable cuteness of being Edward! Okay, not unbearable at all.

I love the afterthought, "Me..." after all the "Yay!"s.

My boss was just diagnosed with H1N1 today. But it's okay because it's not as if we've been sharing documents and office equipment and such all week... oh... wait a minute...

I'm doomed.

[Haus]

He is sooo cute!

Ditto on the MagnaDoodle.

Also ditto on the flu shots. We're keeping our fingers crossed that our peds office will have rec'd their shipment by the time our flu shot clinic rolls around.

[tgsdmom]

Someone with no name, you mean "unEddie-bearable", right?

[Kelli]

We live too rural for DSL as well, but I would like to echo the comment about the cellular internet. If you get cell service that works at your house, you can probaly get pretty high speed internet. My husband and I used to use the Verizon aircard, but moved to Sprint as it worked a bit better at our house. They have a new device called the MiFi, it pulls the cell signal from the cell tower and transmits it to up to 5 computers within 200 feet. We have a relatively small house, so we just leave it plugged in in one spot and both of us can be online anywhere in the house. I always sound like a weird, raving fan when I talk about this, but without it we would literally have to move. My husband works from home, and I work remotely a few times a week and it works great for us. We travel a lot as well, and it's nice because we can take it with us and have wireless internet access pretty much anywhere. You should try a couple different companies, (Sprint, Verizon and At&t) and they all have at least a few week return policy.
I love, love your blog!

[peeks]

Wow he is dead cute. and for some reason I didn't imagine you would sound so... American. Maybe your voice is deeper, but I was hardly expecting Minnie Mouse. hmm.

How is the running going?

[uberimma]

Oh I love it. "Can we just SKIP to the END! The FUN PART WITH THE CLAPPING! Oh okay fine, if you insist. Me! There. Now let's clap! Yay!!!"