Somewhat Lower

So, yeah, we could not find Caroline and when we finally located her she was on the roof. Sort of says it all, doesn't it?

In retrospect - once she was asleep and I had checked on her four times and Steve put some pants on and we both had a Scotch - I realized a few things. I realized that we should have thought to lock her windows. Because, of course, Caroline would climb on the window sill. And, of course, once she was up there she would then be able to combine Cirque du Soleil balance with gecko-like adhesion and truly insane upperbody strength to push up the pane no matter how much it swells with humidity. And, of course, having gotten the window open and the screen out she would then peer into the chilly, inky night and think "What ho! Better investigate the roof!"

Menace Girl, indeed.

I also realized that when I discovered she was gone with only one probable exit I should have used that exit to start to look for her. At the time I was blinded by a suffocating image of her lying on the ground below me, broken, but a more methodical search would have been better. Steve pointed out after we found her on the roof that it had been stupid of us to call for her from the ground - what if she had tried to come closer to the edge when she heard us? A lot of what ifs. What if I had gone to check on her two hours later? What if she had turned right rather than left and gone over that edge? What if she had slipped tripped or decided to practice jumping? What if she had fallen asleep and rolled? What if she hadn't done any of this and the window had actually been opened by a stranger who had taken her? What if... I can do this for hours. 

On the other hand it seems ungrateful to perseverate on every hideous possible outcome when the actual ending to the most frightening fifteen minutes of my life involved a sodden, filthy Caroline beaming around the room at us (Steve: naked and paler than death; Patrick: twisting his hands into knots on her floor; me: shaking and hyperventilating and squeezing her hard enough to pop off her head) and asking if we all wanted to join her in the cuddle cave? We did.

[A cuddle cave is when you pull a blanket over yourself (and preferably a friend) and when Caroline isn't jimmying open windows she loves them.]

What NEXT? That is what worries me with Caroline. It's not the deviltry we know that scares me so much as what she is pondering while we are fastening the exits. Steve can make those windows so secure that even light won't be able to get out but who knows what she will get up to next time. Krissy in the comments talked about leveling up - like when the baby decides to roll for the first time at the exact moment you turn your back for a second and he's on the changing table - and with Edward and Patrick, two cautious souls, they - the next level has always been achieved after a great deal of toe dipping. Caroline's strides are more atomic and...

I CANNOT BELIEVE SHE WAS ON THE ROOF.

All she needed was a snake up there with her and it would have triangulated into my perfect nightmare. Aaaaahhhhh aaaaaaahhhhh aaaaaahhhhhhhhhh

She's fine though. Completely unfazed. A little been there, done that; like,"Ah yes, the roof, Edward. Have you... no?" Smirk.

Caroline has a dramatic streak in her that appeals to my own and I like seeing what she comes up with when I ask her to show me different moods. This is the face she makes when I ask for mysterious. I guess the mystery is why she has her eyes shut?

You can tell her chin is a little worse for wear after her adventures. I am trying not to think about causality. This is her mad face.

This is surprised-but-happy.

This is curl your tongue.

Not sure when that one will come in hand but I suppose it's always nice to have variety in one's repertoire.

In other much less heart-stopping news Caroline and Edward started preschool. I'm surprised by how much of a non-event this has been, especially for Edward who decided about three weeks ago that he was only happy when I am wearing him as a hat. Seriously. He is in the throws of the most major mommy-attachment phase I have ever witnessed and I dreaded what I anticipated as horrendous separation anxiety when I left him at preschool. But he's been fine. I mean, he got teary when I left today but he's been fine at pick-up and the teachers don't seem significantly older after a morning with him so I assume he settles down with all the cars and trucks after I leave. Caroline didn't bother to say goodbye this morning and all weekend she talked about Miss Whosit and Miss Whatsit and how they must be missing her. She has a very healthy sense of self.

I was supposed to See Someone yesterday but she was ill and rescheduled for this afternoon. I am - not surprisingly I guess - worried about it. I am worried about what I will say and how this could possibly work and I am worried about how I will come across.

Here. True story. About anxiety.

Steve and I went to Hawaii for our honeymoon. Our return flight was supposed to take us from Maui to Honolulu and then to the Cities. But it was delayed for hours in Maui and we watched as they worked on one of the engines. Finally they boarded us and flew us to Honolulu where we were delayed for additional hours while they worked on the plane some more. Eventually we took off and were in the air for whatever it was... four hours?... when they announced that they were experiencing a mechanical problem and as we were just that tiny bit closer to Hawaii than California they were turning the plane around and heading back to Honolulu. Which they did and as we landed we saw all the emergency equipment on the tarmac waiting for us.

Scary, sure, but not completely awful. At the time though I was absolutely convinced that the plane was going to crash and I refused to get back on it. Categorically. Refused. My logic was that we were on our honeymoon and that added a tragic glamour to the whole thing that Fate would be unable to ignore and therefore we were literally doomed. So I insisted that we get tickets on a different plane. One-way tickets to Minneapolis from Honolulu in January with three hours notice. Which... what? I think it cost almost as much as the wedding and when I recently asked Steve why he enabled this lunarific behavior (I'm really not psychic. why would I decide that I was?) he just looked at me like a long-suffering golden retriever.

Anyway I have my appointment today and although it is not entirely unreasonable for me to fear that my children will fall (AHEM) it is unreasonable to never take them to a playground (AHEM.)    

Three different Edward moods, all of them - unlike his sister's - sincere.

Amused

Very amused

Not amused

Thank you so much for your comments. It made me feel better to share how scared I had been and it was even nicer to be wrap up afterwards in your concern and kindness. Very much appreciated.

Comments

[Cara]

How do you appear to "someone"? You appear to be a witty, caring woman who loves her family and keeps up with a crazy, busy life remarkably well. And one who is looking for strategies to help her deal with her anxiety so she can do that even better. And if (s)he doesn't see that and know how to help, you can pick someone else. But, honestly, you are not going to be a surprise.

[MaryAnn]

Hi Julia,

I was going to write last time but thought everyone had said it all. I have to say that I was glad you were writing about it instead of the worst happening. My heart goes out to you and Steve as this was so scary.

I also want to commend you for seeking help. It is just too easy not to seek help... i.e. I don't really feel bad or I deal with this myself.

Here is wishing your session went alright and you're feeling less stress and hopeful about working with the counselor.

Mary Ann
Long time reader :)

[S]

Anxiety is a mysterious thing. A mysterious, annoying thing.
My latest bout with an anxiety attack (undiagnosed except from dr. google) was just after going to bed, when this huge fear appeared in my head that I just might die in the night. From what? I have no idea. I woke up my bf and told him, honey I am afraid I am going to die and my children won't know how much I love them!!!
After the fog cleared from his sleepy brain, he said umm, yeah, ok, well, let's see.. how about you write them a letter tomorrow and tell them how much you love them?? Ok? Well? sure.. pat,pat, pat on my back. You are fine!
And sure enough I didn't die..but it was so very real and so scary.
I am chattering aren't I?
Hope your appointment goes well.
Your kids are adorable as always :)

[Liz]

It would be super awesome if you could get Caroline to dramatically re-enact your Someone's reactions to "11 miscarriages", "Balanced Translocation", "Super-Genius", and "Daughter on the Roof." Anyone whose jaw doesn't drop at all the weight you've carried is a robot.

[Kristin]

I couldn't comment on your last post because I was so upset by it! Isn't that crazy, to be that way over someone you don't know at all, but it's true. I read it at work with my heart up in my throat and tears streaming down my face. What a terrifying experience. I am SO glad that everything is ok, and I wish you much luck in trying to block her next move before she thinks of it. So glad that everyone it ok!

[Kristin]

Your Caroline and my Gabe would be quite a dynamic duo and would probably give me a heart attack before the first 10 minutes were out.

I'm glad you are going to see someone and hope it helps.

[suz]

Thanks for the update. So glad you are taking care of YOU! I was majorly stressed just reading about Caroline's escapades. Take care!

[Lizzie]

There are those heart-in-your-throat moments that you just don't forget. Mine was hearing that my daughter (at 2) had pushed a bed over to a window at a friend's house so she could put the cord from the blinds around her neck and jump on the bed. (I might need a little vodka after typing that.)

I've had periods of time with panic attacks about safety--the pool and pond issues when daughter was 2 1/2 come to mind. And I'm already knowing that I'll need meds to deal with her riding in cars with friends! Ack! Cars! Big Death Traps!

Best of luck with your Seeing Someone!!!

[Hetty Fauxvert]

Whew. I'm so glad you feel like you can breathe again. And I hope things work out with your Someone (or if not this, then another). I say this as the only person I know who has actually gotten worse from therapy, probably because I ignored my own instincts about the therapist (thinking I'd hurt her feelings if I changed to someone else) and kept going even though I got worse, worse, worse under her tutelage. If your Someone ever says airily, "Oh, you have to get worse before you get better," then RUN do not walk for the nearest exit.

Caroline still slays me. What a pistol! However, upon second look at those last two photos, her right eye does appear to be turning in. One of our twins' eyes does that and we have had to do the whole eyeglasses/patching thing. Better to get that checked sooner rather than later. (And wouldn't she be stunning in a pair of rhinestone cateye glasses? Just sayin'.)

[Amy]

I am so glad that Caroline is okay, and hope that you will be soon. I am also glad that there is no way that my 2.5yo can climb out his window and on to the roof. Your twins are absolutely scrumptious. I adore your writing, but every time I see a new post, I hope for new pictures of your children.

I've been in therapy for a year and a half and on medication for anxiety for a year. Having someone to just talk to and who won't judge me is wonderful, and I hope you like who you see. Anxiety is challenging, and it's hard to explain why something makes you so anxious, but it does. I wish you all the best.

[Sue]

In New York apartments all the windows have child gates. They mean you can still open the window but kids can't get out. Once installed you don't have to worry about them again. Might be worth looking into.

[Mizasiwa]

wow!! thats all im capable of saying!!! i feel for you!!! i hope your meeting goes well and im really glad the twins have settled so well. you deserve it!!

[lolismum]

I am sure you have thought of this, but do tell the preschool about her propensity to escape, climb and do things that would make Houdini impressed. They need to be vigilant with her. good luck with everything, the "what ifs" are the worst, especially when the hamster brain latches onto them late at night. The roof! Good grief.

[Linda]

Just want to repeat-please inform the preschool about Miss Houdini. It is unbelievable all that she can get up to. They need warning that she is an exceptional escape artist, non par.

[Candy]

Seriously, I don't know how women are supposed to go through life non-anxious. There is so much at stake with every single decision we make or thing we do. My 20 year old daughter is going through a crisis and I feel as if I'm living it myself. We both need to "see someone"!

[kara]

I can definitely follow the logic of how Caroline ended up on the roof and that "of course" she would try that if given the opportunity. What I am having trouble wrapping my head around is the concept that she was still having a good time once she got out there in the cold, wet, dark. DARK. Really, seriously, she wasn't scared one teeny tiny bit? She didn't want to be rescued by Steve? That is AMAZING to me. But then, I'm one of the anxious ones. So, so glad she is okay.

Hope the appointment goes well. We will all be here in the virtual cuddle cave when you get back!

[laura]

I'm sorry. I got stuck on "Steve naked." I am a shallow individual.

[Kim]

Julia:
I'm not really sure how to advise you with Caroline, but I do want to say I understand. Of course each child is unique, but my oldest was much like Caroline. Drama, activity, no sense of boundaries. She is still like that. She's 10 now. She did stop with the physically risky behavior along the way. She finally learned to equate injury with pain and risk with potential injury. She's extremely smart in a weird scary way. Some of the quirkiness you describe in Patrick, reminds me of her too. But she's a quick study and by the time she was three or four, she figured out injury and eventually mortality. I'd say, now as far as physical risk goes, she's too cautious, because she keeps a mental inventory of every possible risk and does a risk benefit assessment on the spot. Where her daredevil nature still gets her into trouble is her absolute willingness to take any kind of risk when confronting authority figures or her lack of verbal filter. I am hopeful she will have a similar epiphany there too. We got to know the principal at her elementary school quite well, unfortunately. However, keeping her mentally active and busy goes a long toward keeping her from filling the gaps with her own ideas. That worked pretty well from the time she was a toddler. Granted it doesn't help Caroline with the bedtime issue, since she should be sleeping. But I guess that's my long winded answer to saying, you can't anticipate everything she will ever do, but maybe there are more ways to keep her engaged in the things she should be doing? More ways to wear her out? I don't know, my girl is a night owl too. Luckily we were in a one story by the time she could figure out windows. Definitely take some precautions, but I think management of her time may be the better route. Good luck. Parenting certainly is not without bumps.
Take care, I do hope the counselor is helpful. You need perspective more than ever with a daughter like Caroline. I've seen a counselor at several points in my journey with my daughter. I am really hoping it's given me a base to head into the teenage years.
-Kim

[zarqa]

Adventure Girl's antics brought a tear to my eye. OMFG! (excuse the language) How absolutely fearless of her!! Healthy sense of self and trust and her dominion over the world around her is right!
Ditto all the comments above about talk therapy helping. Writing therapy helps too, right, and you already do that so SO beautifully.

[Leah]

I honestly still can't get over it all. But to focus on poor neglected Edward for a moment: HUBBA HUBBA! Holy cow that kid is going to be a lady killer. Gorgeous!

[Jan]

Sent good thoughts all morning, East Coast time, for a productive first "session." You're on your way!

[JulieB]

I didn't read the entire 370 comments for your last post, so perhaps I am the 371st person to say this; but good grief - what an excellent piece of writing! and a ghastly experience for a parent. but the drama, the pathos, the humour - surely there is some [huge prize paying] blog award for best dramatic writing that you could sweep in and win? failing that, hurry up and publish a book, or ghost write a better `sequel' to Gone with the Wind. or something that pays vast sums of money for your fabulous prose!
PS and I have double locked my children's window, so that they cannot fall the 18 inches down to the ground floor porch.

[Mary]

Let me tell you a story. One day, I was in the kitchen, which is right next to the door out to the back porch. I was THERE. And I was WATCHING my daughter. My husband went out on the deck, set up a ladder, and climbed up to the roof to clean out gutters or something. I knew he was there, and I knew Em was in the room next to me, and the next thing I knew, husband was back inside, daughter under his arm, saying, "Do you KNOW where I found your DAUGHTER?"

She'd gone out the door (while I was RIGHT THERE) and up the ladder and climbed up to the peak of the roof. Where she said, hi daddy, and it's a good thing he has a strong heart or I'd be a widow right now.

We both just about died. But here's the thing. Today, she is 13, and she is still very dramatic, but she is a rock solid kid. She has excellent good sense, and I would trust her anywhere.

Hang in there. There's hope. Someday I'll tell you about the time we were at a swimming pool, and I was RIGHT THERE, PAYING ATTENTION, and all of a sudden she was underwater on the other side of the pool and a stranger had to jump in with his clothes on to pull her out. My boys never gave me this kind of grief. I swear I'm not a neglectful mother. This stuff just seems to happen with some of these girls.

[Erin]

Did you hear the interview on NPR the other day about the Power of Negative Thinking? Google it if you didn't. I'm a very (understatement) anxious person, but it makes me happy to think there's a way in which I can channel my anxiety into something powerful. Because I am the Worst Case Scenario Queen of the Universe.

[Tracy]

Before I discovered that flying can actually be almost stressless thanks to the wonders of Xanax, I found myself on a flight with a high school glee club. And I said "yeah, this is a movie of the week just WAITING to happen."

[Carrie]

It does get better. I promise. Eventually they learn a little caution. My son is a lot like Caroline. He's managed to survive and will be having a fifth birthday soon, but it was really hard to get here. The absolute worst was when he was about Caroline's age and took off running toward the end of our breezeway. We were three stories up, concrete underneath us. He went through the bars and only his hips stopped him. I still catch my breath when I think of it.

[hermia]

When I was ten and my good friend 11 (ish? we may all have been a year older), we were allowed to take picnics out on the flat porch roof from her bedroom window. Of course, the flat porch roof is connected to the pitched rest of the roof, and it was kind of fun to walk up to the ridge, lie on our bellies, and look over.

One day we were left with the siblings (two seven-year olds, a 3 and a 4 year old.) Because we wanted to go to the roof, they all wanted to come too. So we did. And we all went up to the ridge to peer over. And my friend's mom, who apparently has a great fear of heights, came home from the grocery store to find six children waving cheerfully at her from the top of the roof. Our protestations that we were not letting the little ones run around and were hanging on to them did little to make her feel better. :)

[Deanna]

Have you ever considered that your children each have superpowers? To open that window, she must have super-toddler strength! :)

[Christina]

I've been thinking of you all week. Our American friends think we (Australians)are terribly blunt so I hope this is not offensive to you but when I was wondering what would possess a two year old to climb on to a roof at night (mine's only one so excuse the ignorance) I had a vision of Caroline in manacles - the sort that connect the wrists to the ankles - and laughed. Not really socially acceptable though.

And, good luck with the anxiety and the Someone. Feeling nauseous most of your life is not nice and, being in the same boat, I can empathise with you. If its any comfort, Seeing Someone helps me, as long as I feel comfortable with them and they are a good listener.

I don't comment often but I love your blog and think Patrick is the most wonderful seven-year-old ever and wish I could live close enough to have play dates :)

[LizNeust]

I was travelling and didn't see the ACK post and the denoument until tonight. Even though I knew it turned out okay, I still got so upset for you that I had to take a quck turn around the living room. Yikes!

I've had anxiety issues most of my life, but having kids kicked them into overdrive. I have seen people and not seen people. I have taken medicine and not taken medicine. I am a huge fan of good mental health care regardless of form. I hope you have found a good fit, but I agree with whoever said that the first step is the hardest. Courage!

[joy]

i'm not trying to pick. i love your blog, and your kids. But Caroline's eyes look crossed in the last 2 pictures. it may just be a funny picture, but she may need glasses. i only post because we just had to get glasses for our 11 month old, because her eyes sometimes didn't line up. long story, just wondered if you had noticed.
So glad she is safe. Read the last post at least 3 times, cried each time.

[Amanda]

My goodness, aren't your children just the most beautiful little people in the whole wide world. (I'm still going a little crazy over the roof thing and am terrified to DEATH of all of them, thanks to Caroline, because maybe the boys will somehow become adventurous by proxy and then there will be more stories like the last one and OH GOD. But hell if they aren't just gorgeous.)

[Genevieve]

So glad it all ended well. How terrifying for you! Glad you had already planned to see Someone, as that is certainly a good time to do so (speaking from experience). Good luck in having a good Someone who will be helpful. I value my Someone more than I can say.

"Curl your tongue" will come in handy when Caroline wants to roll her Rs (for Spanish or just in general). Anecdotally, those of my family who cannot curl their tongues cannot roll their Rs, and those who can, can.

[Tracy]

I stumbled in here while surfing. I just had to comment because I've SO BEEN THERE.
First off, are they twins? They look to be about the same age. I have boy/girl 3 yr old twins and to say that they are an adventure would be the understatement of the century. The day before we left for Disney they sampled my fathers heart and cholestorol meds. We got home from the hospital and had about 4 hrs to pack the car, get to the airport, and go. (they were fine, luckily the meds must've tasted bad and they only chomped them a bit before spitting them out.) I have 5 children. (yep. five.) but the twins are by far the most accident/catastrophe prone. I have a theory that it's because most adventurous children will get into trouble but it's limited to their specific interests. With twins- what one doesn't think of the other will and they have help! So they get into EVERYTHING. My daughter is the worst of the two- 18 months I went to get the mail and she snuck out without me even realizing it. Real stealthy like right into the bushes. So I go inside and finish folding laundry- figuring she's in the playroom with her brother, where she'd been before....I hear crying. It's coming from outside. She's at the neighbor's door. The "what if's" still haunt me. My daughter is also very dramatic- like yours- and she does the "feeling faces" although she prefers to make me do them. She likes when do the "mad" face best and she does it along with me.

[Crystal]

I've always thought that Edward gave a little insight into wee little Julia. There's something about him that reminds me of you.

I have to admit, I don't give much thought to Steve.... the little vignettes... but he for obvious reasons comes across a bit more... one-dimensional. We just don't hear enough about him to really get a sense of Steve.

There are ways in which I suspect Caroline is like a wee little Steve... it's a cheering thought.

I also suspect most people would think I got that one completely backwards, but I believe... there are those closer to you who might think I'm on to something.

It's kind of interesting. Makes him, and your marriage, more multi-dimensional. More meaty novel than charming soliloquy.

It is the most fascinating thing for me, raising my family in an intact two-parent family. I tended to mirror my Mom. I am not too connected to my Dad's family, don't really know how to relate to them. Our three little heathens however, are an interesting mish-mash of myself and my beloved.... Interesting the combinations they reflect back at us, and how we see ourselves in them.

So... yeah... interesting to get to know more about Steve, if indirectly.

You made me laugh with the not taking them to the playground. John was sneaky and fast, the faux twins divide and conquer, one go this way, other go that way. I hated parks. They had leashes. Half the parents who saw wanted to know where we got them, a quarter made disapproving faces, a quarter hissed disapproving comments. Let them keep track of an autistic child with no stranger (or other) danger or sense of separation anxiety and an attention hungry youngest child and then they can complain.

BTW, howdy from Michigan... I'm just a lake and a state and a.... awwww, heck. Nevermind.

We're not so much neighbors but... we're in the same region. Though different time zones.... Interesting, I have never before lived in EST.

I love the weather. And the seasons. I thought the Pacific Northwest had seasons. Cha... As if.

[Pam L]

I was wondering if Caroline was eve able to articulate just why she went out the window, 20 feet, to another window, in the dark? Like the first answer, not after she had time to think about it. Of course when my then 3 yr old took off on his Big Wheel to the park, 3 blocks and 3 turns away and down a hill, was asked "Why?" he immediately told me "These kids were waiting for me!", so he already had an answer ready by the time I got there, that made no sense. He just wanted to BE there.

[victoria]

Caroline is just a little dollop of genius and joy

[L.]

Huh! I just went back to look at some older posts of yours (I know. that is probably a stalker kind of thing to do. I'm sorry) and came across this one:

http://julia.typepad.com/julia/2010/08/to-the-victor-goes-the-foil.html

Did Caroline go onto the roof to help the baby helicopter? (Whatever the heck that means. It sounds like something you'd see in Diego, which my son has recently taken to watching. I blame Diego for a lot of stuff, including much recent talk about swinging on vines, and hang-gliding.)

Anyway. Your kids are still unbelievably beautiful. Edwahd looks so... Kennedy (I mean that in a good way, I'm from Massachusetts).

[sarah]

i can totally understand that whole locked-from-the-outside sleeping arrangement you wanted now. i didn't know that there were children who wanted so much to climb; i thought that was a myth that bitch mothers told to scare new mums because my son never did that.

thank jeebus that caroline is alright. seriously.

i was watching a documentary (why, i DON'T know) on that snowboarder with the red hair... the flying tomato or whatever... okay, I WASN'T watching it my husband was, but his mum made an interesting point:

she said that sean (that's his name?) had always been a thrill-seeking daredevil and scared her to death since he was a wee babe and her advice to anyone with a child like that was to immediately find them a scary outlet (like snowboarding) or else they'd hurt themselves. i think she's right... so i think caroline might enjoy some perceived scary (even if potentially dangerous) play of an approved nature.

[quine]

Another one checking in to say hope your meeting went well - I met my Someone last week, for the first time in 6 years.
Also seconding the eye check - if there is a problem, it's much better to deal with it now, whilst Caroline's neural pathways (which funnily enough I envisage as red-carpeted with sparklers all down each side and strewn with diamonds) are still developing.

[Sarah]

LOVE the cuddle cave.

Have you read Dan Savage's 'The Commitment'? He has paragraphs on what he calls the 'irony graph'; that, the more poignant the event, the more likely it is that you will ALL DIE. I think of it often (too often!) as my entire life is predicated on those moments. So your honeymoon story resonated all too well with me; I'd have done exactly the same. Not illogical at all!

My own honeymoon had a similar event; we were in South Africa & took a little plane an hour from Cape Town into the bush to go on safari for a few days. On the way back, our plane waited on the tarmac for an hour before someone came over the tannoy to say that we had a problem but they didn't know what it was, so the engineers were coming out to take a look. Another hour passed, then we were told that we were taxing back to the stand so that the engineers could take a 'proper look'. After ANOTHER hour, the disembodied voice informed us that the engineers didn't know what the cause of the problem was so we were going to 'take off and see what happens'.

I am hyperventilating just remembering this, 6 1/2 years ago. It's safe to say that I have NEVER been so certain we were going to die (not even when a loon pulled out a gun in my crowded underground carriage in London). If there had been ANY way off that plane, I'd have taken it. But there wasn't. All of which to say; when I read your story, I was right in front of you at the ticket desk, changing that flight. No other possible way xx

[Pam L]

Shaun White, check out this video from when he was 11 yrs old: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYxY1LL3AUk

Did you watch the snowboarding at the Olympics? Amazing stuff, they are such a different breed. He is like a god in Colorado. They all have their "routines" they do before a run, certain music, meditating for a minute etc different ways to psyche themselves up. That's why I was glad when my kids did all the crazy outdoor stuff in Scouts, the rock climbing, white water rafting, mountain climbing, rifle & arrow shooting possibly dangerous other things I never heard about. They needed to do them, with someone else who knew how to monitor them without freaking out.

[Linda]

I read your post aloud to my DH and his first reaction was the same as mine... "Maggie junior?" That sounds like something our DD#2 would do, in a heartbeat. People keep reassuring me that she will be an amazing woman, independent and strong... but getting her to adulthood will be a challenge. Most days it is more fun than fear, and it is so worth it. In the meantime, nailed windows it is.

[winecat]

Just checking in to see how your visit went as a veteran of the anxiety and depression wars I can tell you it's VERY difficult some times but oh so worth it.

FINALLY after 2 years of therapy with the right therapist and 1 month of drugs that are the perfect combination for me I feel better than I have in 10, yes count them, 10 years.
Hallelujah!

[Donna]

I suppose, then, that I should be happy my daughter only stuck something up her nose. I'd definitely have to choose nose over roof.

Glad she's okay.

[Spacemom]

Oh Julia-
I think any parent would have anxiety after seeing their kid on the roof (so glad Luna does not have roof to climb to)

I once found Luna at the top of our staircase...outSIDE of the railing. She was 2 at the time and she decided to climb the little edges of the stairs. It was a 12'+ drop to a concrete floor. Freaked? YES.

Good luck on anxiety. I have that too.

[Sami]

Apparently bubble wrap is not a good thing, but what do I know. I think Caroline and my son were actually separated at birth... they're close to the same age and while he has not gone out the window I wouldn't put it past him. Stinkers... he's caused my mom and my sister to go - none of our children ever did that. Good luck and if you come up with any more toddler proofing - let me know. I'm always up for some increased safety in my house!