1 800 What Now?

My mother was supposed to come here for the long weekend. She got to the Washington airport at 6 am yesterday but called me a little after seven to say her 8:30 flight had been delayed for an hour. She waited. Then the flight was pushed back to 11:30. She went in search of a Delta customer service agent (the delightful Beryl) and asked whether Beryl thought there was a chance in hell that the flight might actually depart. Beryl said no. Then she moved my mom to the 2:30 flight, upgraded her to first class and showered her with food vouchers. My mother - in case you are wondering whyfore - is very sweet and charming. Anyway, Mom waited some more and I continued to build expectations at home about Nana! coming! soon! and the hours passed and then the second flight got delayed until 5. Mom said, "Beryl?" and Beryl said, "Sorry. Go home. Not happening. Oh and here take this telephone number so you can call about your refund."

Her trip was already so short that it did not make sense for mom to come a day later so the entire visit has been cancelled and our fun-filled weekend is now stretching before me like a Nanaless desert. I am bummed and my mother is bummed and Steve is horribly distraught (he loves my mother) and Patrick is philosophical (he just saw her in DC after all) and Caroline and Edward were very sad until I gave them each a pudding pop.

Caroline said, "Oh! Banilla is DELICIOUS."

Edward said, "I yike chocyate."

Caroline said, "Yeah, well, that's the way it goes sometimes, little guy."

Little guy? At last tally he was three inches taller and seven pounds heavier than she is. Her condescension towards him transcends time and space and I look forward to seeing what mechanisms he develops in response to being perpetutally patronized by an elf.

But back to my mother. This morning she called the number she had been given by Delta. Then she called it again thinking she must have mis-dialed. The third time she started laughing because apparently Beryl in her haste had written the number incorrectly and my mom wound up calling a recording that offered free sex.

My mom said, "You know, I really admire Delta's committment to their customer satisfaction initiatives."

She later observed, "But I'll bet it isn't really free. They probably charge for baggage."

I think my mother is hilarious and that is why I talk to her five hundred times a day and why I am so sad that she isn't here. Also, now what? It's the fourth of July weekend and we were all set to show her the farm and grill things but without her the effort just doesn't seem worth it somehow.

What about you, American compatriots? What are you doing? And you, my far-flung friends? You must enjoy it when America shuts down for a day or two. It's like when our neighbors go out of town and take their dog. It's quieter.

I hesitated before mentioning this because I am pretty sure that someone will take offense about something and I dislike it when you scold me but... I am thinking about it a lot and transparency and all. 

Between the ages of 21 and 38 I slowly gained ten pounds. This seemed about right to me: I once lived on camel lights, aspirin, alcohol and egg rolls only when I could afford them; so I was thin and unhealthy. After that of course I was pregnant a million times, had three kids, got older... fine. I did try the cabbage soup diet last summer to get into some pants and then again to get into a different pair of pants but I have to admit that was more an experiment in the joys of self-denial than an actual weight management initiative.

Then, somehow, between March and now, I have gained another ten pounds. Blammo. Just like that. And it is all in my ass and my stomach. Oh and my breasts but no one is complaining about that - that's fine. Keep it up. And wouldn't it be nice if it worked like that? "Oh I'd love another piece of cake but I can't... it'll go right to my boobs if I do." Or "I had to stop putting whipping cream in my coffee since it was making my eyelashes so thick and long."

Where was I? Right. Ten pounds in three months. Since I have not started eating an icecream cake every morning I am wondering if the sudden weight gain is somehow related to the anti-anxiety medication (Celexa) that I have been on since last November. I seem to have cycled through most of the other possible side effects (and to be fair most have passed after a few weeks - best advice my doctor has ever given me : "Give a side effect two months to resolve itself") and maybe this too shall pass but I don't know. On the one hand I feel better than I ever have in my entire life. I feel like a painting that has been straightened - my view on risks and dangers and impending tragedy was skewed and now it is not and it is marvelous. On the other I googled Celexa and weight gain and found stories about people who gained gained thirty forty fifty pounds and I thought GOOD LORD. I don't want to have to choose between mental and physical health. That sucks.

I mentioned the sudden weight gain to my doctor (also the sleepiness) and he suggested cutting my dose in half and seeing if it helps. I have been doing this off-and-on for about a week and so far the only measurable difference is that I rolled down my window and yelled "Do you MIND?" at a gaggle of roller skiiers who not only insisted upon occupying the dead center of my road they scooted along; they then congregated en masse at the stop sign, preventing me from turning and thus delaying my ability to get rid of my children at camp by THREE WHOLE MINUTES. I am perfectly willing to share the road but just for reference (Edward) sharing doesn't mean that you get the whole thing.

So I am a little crabby is what I am saying.

Anyway, having lauded the emotional miracle that is Celexa I felt compelled to tell you that it's not all peaches and cream. Well it might be but I wouldn't know because I have stopped eating. Actually I signed up for Weight Watchers because I do well when I get to obsess about controlling things (points! earning points!) I started last night and was amused to see that I used up 70% of my daily allotment on red wine. I mentioned this to Steve and he said that this struck him as disturbing but I started at 9 at night and the other 30% went to brown rice.   

Not sure what I am expecting you to say, really, but there it is. If you have any advice or philosophy I'll take it.

I recently made a genealogical breakthrough (I am fascinated by family history and always have been. I just like stories I think) and part of our trip to DC was dedicated to what I called Patrick's Family Heritage Tour (he referred to as The Compromise) which started with the houses where Steve and I had lived as children and ended at the new-to-me Litton family Cemetary. I never realized this before about a month ago but once upon a time 400 acres just north of Washington were farmed by my great great great great great great great grandfather. So Patrick and I went... back to Rockville. Rockville, home of my ancestors.

The graveyard used to be near the house but in the intervening three centuries the house fell down and a suburb grew around it. It was sort of charming. The backyards of a block full of 1960s ranch homes formed a peaceful ring around the place. Like a Brady Bunch Stonehenge.

I almost forgot! The NICEST thing happened. The first stop on our tour was the house where Steve's grandparents had lived. There was a woman working on the garden when we arrived so I explained that Patrick's great-grandparents had lived in the house (because I thought she would wonder why I was about to take a picture.) She promptly invited us in, gave us a tour, explained that Steve's grandfather had practiced medicine out of the house and showed us where he had had his exam room and where people would wait. She could not have been any more gracious and as we left she took down a framed sign that was hanging on their porch and said, "I would like to give you this. I think it should go back to the family."

Steve's grandfather made it. Isn't that just so... KIND of the new owners? I got all weepy as I accepted it.

Enjoy your holiday if you have one and if not, there's always August.

Comments

[Ellie]

Well, I suppose if you're really, really bored this weekend, you could try calling that number Beryl so kindly shared with your mother? You know, maybe?

Also, have heard your state has shut down: my condolences. Is it just me or do state politics seem to have taken on a completely new level of insanity and unreasonable behavior?

The weight gain sounds frustrating. (I have the opposite problem, seemingly unstoppable weight loss since last summer's brain tumor. Just a slow but very steady loss. My breasts are getting smaller and this is annoying. Sure I've lost plenty from hips, thighs and belly but gosh, why couldn't my brests have remained untouched). I would say for you ... eat healthily, continue your dosage at a level commensurate with steady mental health, and add exercise. Lots of exercise. Like, bike 10-12 miles a day. Good luck.

The story about Steve's grandparents' house was very sweet.

[Lora]

I had the sleepiness/weight gain problem when I took Zoloft. I gained 10 pounds in 4 weeks. This time around I'm taking Wellbutrin and haven't had any of the sleepiness/weight gain issues. I would go back to your doctor and discuss other options. The nice thing about the anti-anxiety/depression meds is that there are quite a few to choose from. Since you've been taking Celexa since November you've given this one a good try - maybe it's time to try another to see if you can get rid of the side effects.

[Anon for this]

Having had a lot of experience with anti-depressants of the SSRI variety but not Celexa, take this with a grain of salt please.

But have you actually noticed that you are eating more? Have you kept a food diary or tracked what you are eating? While everyone responds to the drugs differently, it may not be worth the mental agony of dieting.

I gain about five pounds a month while on antidepressants, and there is nothing I can do about it. Even eating normally, I still gain weight. Then I tried to fight it and failed. Decided that feeling hungry all the time was definitely not conducive to my mental health at a time when I need anti-depressants.

I hope that dieting works for you. Or that you can find a drug that is effective without weight gain.

Oh my it sucks ass to have to decide between gaining so much weight and feeling like you can get through the day. I totally can sympathize.

Maybe you could try adding in another drug (like Topamax -- for migraines) that would ameliorate the weight gain. Even 50 mg, a very low doss, helped me a lot with the weight effect.

I'm trying to give concrete suggestions because it just might not be something you can control by eating less, sad to say. I wish you the best of luck.

[Anne]

Ha. Reading about that gift made me a little weepy too. Which just tells me that the PMS is poised to strike. Anyhoo, carry on, have a lovely weekend. Apparently I'll be crabby and weepy.

[Kim]

Am now humming ancient REM songs. So thanks for that! And sorry about the weight gain. Agree that you should monitor what you're eating, unless you know that feeling good has increased your appetite.

[Melody_NC]

Probably not a popular answer but I went vegan a few months ago (with the occasional dip in the vegetarian pool) and have lost ten pounds effortlessly, as in no exercise and no dieting/deprivation. There was definitely a learning curve with cooking vegan and sometimes I'm preparing extra meals (husband will eat vegan, kids will not) but I feel amazing and the weight seems to continue to trickle away. I have never been the weight I am now without exercise and calorie counting so being able to do this without all of that is worth it to me.

[Dina]

Happy about your perk up - but segue....segue. Don't know if anyone recommended the Artemis Fowl series of books for Patrick. Premise...the 10 year old, genius, Fowler is holding together the (nefariously gained) family fortune since his father was captured by the Russian Mafia while trying to transport about 50 million cokes into the country for free enterprise (and to fill his coffers). Stories include fairies, dwarves, leprechauns (SP?) and all their futuristic gadgets. Sorry, you could look this all up, but I get carried away by wonderful books. Also, try anything else by Eoin Colfer...very creative and enjoyable for adults, too. Happy Fourth

[AR]

Erm, I'm on an anti-depressant (not Celexa; and have maybe put on 10 lbs over the course of two years, but that could be due to hedonistic eating), but what I want to say is, and erm, this might not be what you want to hear: WW is so bad. I did it for 2 years and I lost buckets of weight and I looked thinner than I had in ages. Yay! But then I was hungry all the time (because WW is actually a diet disguised as healthy eating--and oh, I wasn't on the Lexepro then) and I eventually got tired of starving myself and gained it all back plus 10.

I think...now I do intuitive eating and I'm not skinnier and I might even be a little fatter (though all my clothes still fit and you know, my husband still adores me) and the thing is: I'm insanely happy. Instead of working on controlling calories and fat grams I control hatred of myself.

So erm, I'm not lecturing you. I'm just saying that there's another way. Respectfully. I'm sure you'll work out what's best for you (and it might be WW), but yes, there are other options.

[Cara]

My girl turns one on the 4th. We're doing it up right with watermelon, sprinklers, the grill, sparklers, and about 30 of our nearest and dearest. (I swear I tried to keep it small. But, most of that's family and there's no stopping them once they get started.)

[vanessa]

1. Dude, you must come to DC again soonish and have a real bloggy get together.
2. All SSRIs cause weight gain. It sucks but there you go. But I wouldn't go worrying about it yet: it may be that 10 lbs (really not much at all) is all you will gain. Also, while being SUPER overweight is not good for you, being a little bit "overweight" but still fit is perfectly fine, health wise, and not worth risking your mental health for.

[Amanda]

We're local-ish to you, and headed to the Hudson parade tomorrow (it starts at 11, need to get there early to score seats).

Great parade, all the right stuff (horses, bands, kids doing karate, fire trucks, etc), but not too long, plus they still throw candy!

Corner of 2nd & St. Croix is our annual site.

[C]

The only med I have been on for anxiety and depression that didnt cause weight gain is wellbutrian (sp). My PCP calls it the wellbutrain diet. Been on meds for 12 years and have gained about 40 lbs. Lost some, but it is no longer coming off so liposuction it is. Not the answer for most but it is for me.

[abi]

I am going to repeat the commenter AR above, which is that dieting in general, and WW in particular, is not really a solution; and I am going to gently suggest that although you have gained weight, that is not the same as saying that you are any less healthy, or that -- heaven forbid -- you are choosing between your mental and physical health. Weight gain may or may not be an inevitable side effect of the Celexa, but almost always is the inevitable result of dieting, so frankly I don't find it worth the mental and physical stress. And I, too, am going to suggest you do some research into intuitive eating. This is a good place to start: http://www.intuitiveeating.org/.

[L]

I don't know if this is relevant for you, but my mom takes Celexa and it gives her carbohydrate cravings. What works for her is to eat small snacks with healthy carbs (like, a slice of whole wheat bread) in between meals. She says that if she eats a snack *before* she gets too hungry, everything is fine, but otherwise, she gets desperate for sugar.

[liza]

leaving aside the weight issue, and noticing only the bookends: so basically, what you are saying is both you and your mom
could charm the pants off a snake (is that a saying?)?
whilst the theme of your blog in general is that your children are incredibly charming?
count me as charmed too.

[liza]

ugh, charmed, meaning, I fall under the spell, not that i too cast a spell! mine english is disapparating

[katie]

oh rockville, i was just there today. and i would have much rather met you and others at the 4P's on a thursday night! i would have even schlepped along the 5 month old b/c i'm not ashamed to bring a baby to a bar! and drink a beer! anyway, glad your adventures in DC were fun but sad i didn't see you were coming till after you left, what with the 5 month old in my house and all. i would have given my 2cents on things to do (like the udvary-hazy air and space annex out at dulles! modern architecture AND space exploration AND aviation history all rolled into one!).

[katie]

ps - when i was on zoloft (now i'm on cymbalta) i gained a fair amount. my shrink said it's because you can just stop caring. not that the medication itself is directly making you gain weight, it's just making you so relaxed you don't think twice about having dessert or an extra snack and the pounds creep on. now i'm just fat because i live on a diet of nutella and gummy bears. but we're increasing my meds which should help me feel more normal soon :)

[jen w]

I would say it is probably the medication. If you only gain 10, maybe it is fine. 10 isn't so bad...Could you be eating differently because you feel better, are happier?? Eating a bit more? I have slowly gained about 10 lb in the last 10 yr and I'm not happy about it. I've started running and am actually in better physical shape than I've been in since I was about 20, but still the weight has not moved. I was on wellbutrin for a while a couple years ago but did not gain or lose with it. I think that the fact that you are feeling so much better is worth more than the 10 lb. I would not go off the meds, unless you continue to gain a lot more. ya know?? It could also be just that your metabolism is changing. I found that mine has slowed way down (I'm 37) and I think part of it is normal aging. I read the normal female gains 5 lb every 10 years even without eating more. Depressing huh?

[bethany actually]

That sign is awesome, and it's very cool that they gave it to you!

We're doing nothing much for the 4th weekend except enjoying being at home. And shooting off some legal fireworks.

Sorry about your mom's aborted visit. That's a bummer.

[Cris]

The story of the sign is lovely. Isn't it wonderful when people are kind? We went to my grandfather's grandfather's farm and the people there were sweet to us too - their grandkids played with my kids (who were sooooo sick of being in the car and really needed to blow off steam) and didn't mind at all that Cam chased the chickens. We got to take lots of pictures and then went to the graveyard and tracked down the first member of the family to move to Michigan long long ago.

As for the weight gain - you have my sympathy. I was doing so well with diet and exercise for about four months last year and then we thought about doing one more IVF cycle. I immediately stopped exercising and started eating and have gained so much weight. I feel like I don't even look like myself. I'm still searching for a solution that fits into my increasingly busy life - so hearing about your efforts is always appreciated. I'll hope for the best for you!

[Leslie]

For the 4th of July, I am going to sit around and pray for rain and that the idiots don't set off fireworks. It is not a good time to be living in New Mexico.

[Mary]

When I took Zoloft, I gained 40 lbs over the year and a half I was on it. What I wish someone had told me is to quit drinking alcohol. A big part of the problem was that I was drinking too much, which made me more depressed and anxious and also added a ton of calories to my diet. I went off the Zoloft and quit drinking and the weight is coming off again, glacially slowly, but I'll take it.

My doctor did mention, at the time, that Wellbutrin doesn't have that side effect, FWIW.

[KatieV]

The sign is so, so sweet and a wonderful keepsake. So kind of her to give it.

And I laughed out loud at "part of our trip to DC was dedicated to what I called Patrick's Family Heritage Tour (he referred to as The Compromise)."

Re: the weight gain, I know my husband gained a good bit when he went on Paxil. None of his eating/exercising habits had changed--just the medication. The weight, four years later, is still there. But at least he feels better!

[L]

Hey, did you ever end up getting your thyroid function checked? It might be a worthwhile thing to do at this point. :D

[Michelle]

Your problem with weight gain and anti-depressants/anxiety meds is something I am well aware of as I too had this problem. I switched to Wellbutrin (many others have mentioned as well) it was the only one I had found with research that did not cause gain and my in fact cause some loss.

[GingerB]

Didn't you remember REM's sound advice "Don't Go Back to Rockville?" I probably understood more lyrics in that song than any other early REM . . . I don't think I could disregard it.

Welbutin, baby. Down some pounds here, and I don't say that very often. Try not aging, because aging apparently makes you more fat and more fertile and this might just upset the applecart for you. Not sleeping might help, or it might just make you nonsensical, as it does me.

I hope to spend time doing time honored guilt-relieving-baking wherein I make pies or cakes for people to whom I am in debt. Children look cute when you let them scatter flour.

[Bec]

Snap. 10 pounds (5 kilo's here). Suck it up and deal with it, it's worth it :)

After three years I just came off the anti depressants and the weight just fell off. Truly it's worth it.

Go shopping, buy bigger pants.

Bec

[Nancy]

WW online has helped me realize I can eat whatever I want but in smaller portions and that works for me. I've lost 30 lbs slowly but that's okay. My daughter is currently on Spark People - an online program that is free and she has lost 36 lbs so far.

[Carla Hinkle]

I have no advice on the anti-depressant/weight gain connection (though it sounds like there is one and please, put your mental health first!!).

But what I can contribute is that I am 38 and I have noticed a major, major slowdown in my metabolism this year. I just need far fewer calories than I used to and if I try to exist on my old-normal eating habits, I gain weight. Instantly. I find it a bit depressing, but if I want to be in the same general size category as I was 5 years ago, I need to eat 300-500 calories less a day. I'm trying to train myself into knowing what this new normal is so I don't have to obsessively track calories, which is also depressing.

So I guess it could be a combination of your meds and age. If it were me, I think I'd tinker w/the meds (at least find out if there's something you can do) and also try to rework eating habits. Being 10 pounds up is not so bad but I can totally see why you wouldn't want to be 20 pounds up.

[June]

WW isn't a drastic diet if you're only trying to lose 10. I did that once and it was fantastic... although you're right, counting points is just secretly FUN. Charts! Graphs! Calculators! I guess I have a secret math nerd after all.

Anyway, I support you! Lose the 10, it feels fantastic. Sure you're probably just as healthy at this size but you can be healthy AND vain too! :)

[Pam L]

I have no experience with any mood altering drugs, well,not legal ones anyway,and that was a long time ago. But what I mean to say is, I think it's OK and "normal" to be cranky or crabby sometimes. Not if you find yourself walking around with a scowl on your face, but when my neighbors decided they had to leave for their boat trip at 5am and all their friends that were going showed up hollering and revving their truck engines, I was crabby too, mostly because it made me dream of unknown part guests who kept showing up at my house, and would not leave only it wasn't my house, and I woke up very cranky. Then last week when my next door neighbor decided 11pm at night was the perfect time to cut up some lumber in his garage,using a power saw, with the door open , I almost yelled out the window to him, but I didn't, I don't know why. Anyway, some crankiness is OK and a much better option than gaining 40 pounds.

Oh, and I think the heritage tour was a grand idea and the woman who gave you the sign was awesome.

[Chaya]

Julia, I love you. Please don't ever get a twitter account and disappear on me.

[SarahB]

This weekend is devoted to resting and nesting, what with 5 weeks to go being pregnant. I'm glad for the extra day and not doing anything traditionally "July Fourth." It's kind of strange, but also lovely.

I'm sorry your mother couldn't make it.

I'm also sorry about the 10 pounds in few months business. My body stated to decide to gain weight about the time I hit 29-30, and I was starting to "outgrow" my pants, but then I got pregnant. So, while I'm gaining plenty for a pregnant lady, I'm trying not to fuss too much about it until this whole birthing business is over. I would say that only an extra 10 pounds from 18 to 38 is a real gift in terms of weight baseline, so that's something. But, yes, I would be looking into some diet and exercise changes since the Celexa seems necessary for now and see how it goes. And, please, do share. As someone who's realizing that the automatic skinniness of my youth may be gone forever, I would love to hear what works for you.

[Val]

How kind of her to give you the sign! I love that.

'No advice on the rest, but your kids are adorable, I'm sorry your mom won't get to spend the 4th with you all, and good luck figuring out the health issues. I hope you guys have a good weekend, whatever you end up doing. :)

[Mary]

We just saw a picture of you a few weeks ago and you look good! I'd be delighted to be ten pounds up and be so slim or down ten pounds and look like that. Maybe the Celexa is killing your squirrel-like metabolism but don't be too hard on yourself. All you are is maybe not quite as skinny as you used to be. I hope WW helps you get where you want to be.

Have a happy fourth!

[laura]

You might want to have your thyroid levels checked in relation to your weight gain.

[RocketGrl]

My mom said, "You know, I really admire Delta's committment to their customer satisfaction initiatives."
You kill me.

So why were the flights getting cancelled?

[Kathleen]

Love the sign story.

I gained weight on...Welbutrin, being a freak of nature in so many ways this is not surprising to me.

Over the course of a decade of dealing with depression I've had to decide to be okay with being sane and 50lbs overweight. I stopped trying to loose weigh because everytime I did, I gained it back plus 10.

Now that I am not dieting, my weight has stablized. I often wonder what my body weight would be if I had accepted the extra 20 instead of what I wound up doing.

[Abi]

I was on Celexa recently, and did indeed gain weight - probably about 20 lbs, at a guess, although I wasn't enthusiastic about weighing myself at my fattest. I did lose a fair bit of weight by living communally in a place which didn't have all that much tasty food I could eat (celiac: biscuits were out), and I was required to work quite hard.

Of course, when I returned to a more friendly food environment much of the weight came back on. However, the weight loss thing can be done, to an extent at least. Perhaps it would be more productive to concentrate on not gaining any more weight at the moment. That's always a good start.

I would suggest it's better to be heavier and happier than lighter and less happy, although there is a lot to be said for being able to fit into one's trousers.

The random sleepiness thing is very annoying, particularly if it chooses to pair itself with random insomnia. Unfortunately, I used a hypnosis thing to help me to get to sleep, which used sounds very similar to those I heard as part of my job (tuning organs in churches). This meant that my brain associated tuning organs with going to sleep, which was not helpful.

Having said that, it appeared to associate most things with going to sleep. I fell asleep in some interesting places: on a stone floor in church (next to a radiator) while I was supposed to be practising the organ; at my desk (OK, so that's not interesting in the slightest); sitting cross-legged on top of a table tennis table; while holding notes for organ tuners; standing up, singing in a choir...

No idea how you get around that one, I'm afraid. I wish I'd known, as the ability to stay awake can be crucial to one's social functioning.

[Christina Pitt]

Now you mention it, there hasn't been a lot of news out of your place - and it makes sense now I look at the date.

I hear you on the breasts - after my boy came I lost two cup sizes (that is to say, I am now flat chested) - and gained a diastasis and ?hernia which I am too lazy to fix. Hard to handle when my stomach had always previously been nice and tight, no exercise required.

As for our weekend, my husband and I have been obsessing over whether and what to build on the back of our block. It's a residential block with a subdivision - essentially, land we already own. (And I wish I had a community of advisors like you to help us out. The problem is, it's a reasonable economic choice, but is it a sensible lifestyle choice? For a lazy-bones likes me?) But I hope you do find something entertaining to keep you entertained in lieu of your entertaining mother.

On books - as I'm writing an epic - after you mentioned the book about the necromancers, Garth Nix is another author who might interest you; also possibly Anthony Eaton. Also, when I was a bit older than Patrick I really enjoyed the Lockie Leonard books by Tim Winton (disclaimer: his adult novels are oh-so-black, I won't read them).

Lastly, what a fantastic piece of family history and what a lovely way to acquire it. Where are you going to hang it?

[Christina Pitt]

- dumbASS (me). Garth Nix wrote Sabriel, didn't he. I was thinking of the Keys to the Kingdom series. It isn't as good as the Abhorsen series, in my opinion. But still enjoyable. Anyways. Sorry about that.

[Slim]

Until you come back, could those of us in the DC area hang out with your mother?

Health at Every Size. Intuitive eating. Get some exercise, eat your veggies, get a good night's sleep, retain your ability to enjoy life. You are not giving up your physical health for your mental health; you're just giving up the pursuit of thinness.

[Leslie]

I see several people have recommended Wellbutrin. Just one word of caution about it: it's a great anti-depressant, but it can sometimes make anxiety worse, so be cautious with it.

[Mizasiwa]

I have to agree - the picture you posted does not look like you are overweight?? I have put on 10 kgs in 3 years and it is just growing and growing. Im short which makes every centimetre look terrible. If you think you need to lose the wight then you do but i wouldnt stress too much if the meds are working i wouldnt mess with them, feelng healthy in your mind is very important, if you change the meds you may have something else to worry about and thats not good. Sorry to hear about your mom not making it. Isnt if funny that when you cant share something it doesnt seem worth it? anyway I hope you enjoy it regardless. still love you to pieces!!

[wasabi]

I also gained a lot of weight on Zoloft and then switched to Welbutrin. However I'm not saying that to suggest you should switch to Welbutrin. I was depressed, not anxious. I'm just saying yes if you have gained 10-20lbs in just a matter of months then it is probably related to the Celexa, though I suspect as someone else suggested that it's leading to you eating more, not that the medicine is just making you gain weight while you eat the same amount of food. You might just ask your doctor if he could recommend a drug that doesn't have that side effect.

[Jenn]

My perspective on weight and losing it is rather skewed. So I'll just say that I spent the weekend catching up on chores, packing for our move later this year (pending approval of our short sale offer) and reading your archives until the backlight from my iPad made my eyes hurt. And as a kid who used to keep a calendar to mark the days until one of Nana's visits .. And a grown up who talks to her mother a LOT more since she retired, my condolences on the missed visit.

[Crystal]

Let's see, I'm an obsessive, antisocial asshat with brain damage. So my social life has never been terribly rich (wait, I can't truthfully say that, but there have been ample gaps).

I've either gone all out and regretted the leftovers and hassle, or just let things slip quietly by, sometimes I've punted.... So far my kids are reasonably well adjusted for being raised by an obsessive, antisocial brain damaged asshat.... And then there have been the glorious times we had the whole gang, fun, but sometimes the quiet is nice too. When did Mr. Rockwell seep into our other holidays anyway?

One nephew flew all too soon back to FL, other nephew still here for another week and a half, I'm by turns excited and despondent at the prospect of his departure. Mostly despondent, he's a fantastic kid. I have John's two best Portland friends to pick up for a week this week, and then a late night rendezvous with GR airport one night, then a late morning appointment with Detroit the next day. I'm taking John and booking a hotel, visiting a friend, and stocking up on all the Trader Joes I can fit in the Coleman refrigerated cooler and the bag coolers with ice. Then I shall proceed to veg for a week before getting back to working with the trainer on my ponies.

Today I'm ready to eat my young, shouldn't have delayed my preparations and having a grand time anyway. :)

Red wine and brown rice is full of antioxidants. I think it's a brilliant diet, actually. Add a bit of lettuce, and maybe cut back enough for a small tender steak, and I think you're on to something. :)

Have a happy 4th, Julia. :)

[RocketGrl]

It's nice to see lots of my sisters hanging out around the edge of the pharma bell curve comment here. I found the welbutrin/lexapro cocktail awesome for depression and social issues, but ohh the side effects. Elavil's side effects were untenable too.I have been on Zoloft for seveal year without side effects, but it does little to help with my social anxiety. So being around people is fine once I am there, but prying me out of the house? That's another story.

[Shawna]

I can't complain, because we had Canada Day on Friday... but I CAN complain that the province I work in does not have a holiday in August, yet the province I live in and - here's the key part - have my kids' daycare in does. So I'll have to take it off as a holiday that counts against my annual leave allotment.

Humbug.

I nevertheless hope you're having a great July 4th and look forward to your next installment!

Also, I will read your readers' suggestions regarding the weight thing with interest. I have been mildly contemplating measures more drastic than saying no to a fourth cookie in one sitting...