Very Very Exclusive

It's Not A Corset

At night Edward wears a discreet undergarment, one that pulls up and is designed for the retention of unexpected moisture - you know, in case a pipe bursts in the wall and Edward's bed is accidentally flooded.

I think this is perfectly normal, children develop differently and at their own pace, all things in good time, to every flower there is a season and possibly some Simon and Garfunkle lyrics as well. Mellow, patient, rosemary, thyme, the opposite of nonplussed which I think should be plussed. Steve - well, without spreading gossip from the early 1970s - let's just say Steve is the very last person on the planet who would ever lift an eyebrow over a heavy sleeper with a small bladder. And even though Caroline has been sleeping a la Marilyn Monroe (she's not even wearing a smile) for two years nobody mentions it - not even Caroline.

However Edward has noticed in the past few weeks that this foundation piece is remarkably similar in its design to that of a diaper. And do you know who wears diapers? BABIES. And do you know what Edward most certainly is not? A BABY. In case you haven't noticed - and he is perfectly willing to scream this information directly into your ear - he is a big boy.

So Edward has started asking, sometimes piteously and sometimes aggressively and sometimes in song, to wear pajamas without anything underneath them. And I have said sure, absolutely, but before he does that he needs to make sure his body is ready, too, and the best way for him to know that his body is ready is for him to wake up dry in the morning.

To date this has never happened. Ever. No I lie. He woke up dry once a couple of years ago but he was sick and horribly dehydrated. But apart from that, never. 

In an effort to assist him we have: limited bedtime drinks, taken him to pee before bed, woken him up an hour and a half later and taken him to pee again but when I go up to check on him an hour after that... he's wet. Seriously between the hours of 9 and midnight the child has never once not peed in his sleep.

If it were up to me I would simply carry on with the pull-up until he stops on his own but he's upset about it and I would like to help him if I can. Usually I am pretty confident in my parenting instincts (I didn't say I was right; I just said I was confident) but I am utterly stumped by this. Putting a resisting child into an overnight diaper feels wrong wrong wrong but having him wake up in a cold sticky... well that certainly isn't right either.

Do you have any thoughts at all? Either on how to help him stay dry overnight or how to help him feel better about the need to wait until he strips or a product suggestion that might feel less diaper-like while keeping me out of the laundry room at three in the morning? Anything? I had come to the conclusion that the entire notion of bed-wetting was created by previous generations of parents with unreasonable expectations (why take away the safety net before you've learned how to walk on the wire?) but I had never contemplated a child who obstinately rejected my acceptance.

PS Yeah, he's in goodnites already. The monster truck motif is failing to convince him of anything.